A Child's Christmases in Wales Page #6

- Gorwel!

That's right.

When we finish with the presents,

let's get sledging, like.

But the snow has melted.

Oh, don't worry about that, Bren.

We'll grease 'em up, like, and off we go.

- I don't think this is a good idea.

- Trust me, Bren.

I waited 15 years for it to snow, like.

Every dog has its day.

You're not an animal, Gorwel.

I'm the closest thing we've got.

Oh, goodness me...

Come on, boys.

Geraint, he can't go tobogganing.

Talk some sense into him, will you?

Geraint!

Um... Gorwel...

Well, this is a stupid idea.

I really don't think...

Oh, you worry too much, Bren.

Yes, well, your problem is

you don't worry enough, Gorwel.

Ah! I can't be doing with

that pessimism stuff.

Who was it that said

I'd never climb Mount Everest,

or take aver Blankety Blank?

But you haven't.

Yet.

- Oh!

- Come on, then, boys.

Let's have it!

Now, the key to winning a sledge race

is all about coming down

that hill as fast as you can.

You are going to go down the hill,

down the hill.

What you mustn't do at any point

is think about going up the hill.

I'm not getting on the flaming sledge.

Don't be ridiculous, boy. How else

are you going to win a sledge race?

You can't tell me what to do.

Are you disobeying me, boy?

I'm not a boy! I'm 16 in two weeks.

I will decide when you're 16,

thank you very much.

Right now you're going to listen to me.

Now, everybody here - everybody -

is waiting for you to get on that sledge.

Do you want to be remembered as the

one who spoilt everybody's fun today?

No-one else thinks we should sledge.

Everyone except you and Gorwel

wants to go home.

What, so you know that, do you? You

know what everybody wants, do you?

Why don't you ask them? Go on.

Let's have a vote.

Who thinks that we should sledge

down this hill?

Well, I don't think much

of the idea, to be honest.

It's treacherous,

but, well, if Owen wants to.

I'm just worried that someone's

going to get hurt,

but if Owen's got his heart

set on it, then...

I don't really fancy it.

There you go. You see?

No-one but you and Gorwel

thinks that we should do it

and Gorwel's not right in the head.

How dare you say that

towards your Uncle Gorwel!

You said it yourself.

You said, "If there was any sense,

"they'd lock him up in the aquarium

and throw away the key."

Um, he's distorting, right? I didn't...

I'll tell you another thing, my boy...

I'm not your boy!

Yes, you flaming well are!

Those tests were inconclusive.

I'm not anyone's boy. I don't need you.

All you've ever done for me

is boss me around, talk down to me.

"Shut up, Maurice." "Go over there,

Maurice." "Maurice, this is my girlfriend.

"She's a dog walker,

but also does erotic dancing."

Nothing wrong with having a dual income.

Well, not this time.

This time you're going to do

what I want,

and we're not sledging down that hill.

- No-one is sledging down that hill.

- Oh, my God!

Watch out!

- Maurice!

- Watch out, Bren!

I told you one day it'd be me

sitting around with my feet up.

Peace on Earth and mercy mild...

You know what you did

was very impressive.

Anybody can look at their father

and see a hero,

but you realised I'm just a man,

like Tom Jones,

and like Tom, I... I make mistakes.

In the New Year, er, I thought perhaps

we could spend some more...

father-and-son time together.

Quality time.

Do you want to go to Alton Towers?

Yeah?

Good lad, yeah,

I know a couple of people there.

Like Tom Jones,

I'll get it shut down for the day

so we can have it to ourselves.

Huw, come back.

Better go and, er, help finish off.

What are you watching?

It's A Wonderful Life.

What happened?

This chap was depressed, and then

it turns out that life is, er, wonderful.

Any good?

I quite liked it.

Everybody, please take you places

at the table. The dinner is prepared.

Come on, Bren. Come on.

Ladies and gentlemen,

sorry for the delay.

The Rhys brothers proudly present

the turkey...

...sandwiches.

Oh!

Do you know,

I lave a turkey sandwich.

Oh, hang on a minute, Bren.

I made you a special sandwich, like.

Oh!

- There we are.

- Thank you.

There we are.

Stilton.

Gorwel...

...I don't actually like cheese.

What?! Gone off it, have you?

I've never liked it,

I just didn't know how to tell you.

Well, in that case, Bren,

I apologise for having got you

over ten years' worth of cheese

and cheese-related paraphernalia.

It's the thought that counts.

I must admit, I am a little relieved.

I was having a hell of a time

tracking down Cheeses Of Antarctic

Merry Christmas, everyone.

Merry Christmas!

So although every Christmas was the same,

in a way,

this one was a bit different.

Huw had learned to value his son.

My parents, to value each other.

Gorwel had learned not to go hurtling

towards innocent people on a toboggan.

A lesson he sadly forgot only days later.

And me?

Not sure what I learned, really.

But for what it's worth,

I've passed it on.

Merry Christmas.

...And a happy New Year

Good tidings we bring

To you and your king

We wish you a merry Christmas

And a happy New Year

Oh, bring us a figgy pudding

Oh, bring us a figgy pudding

Oh, bring us a figgy pudding

And a cup of good cheer

We won't go until we get some

We won't go until we get some

We won't go until we get some

So bring some out here

We wish you a merry Christmas

We wish you a merry Christmas

We wish you a merry Christmas

And a happy New Year!

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