A Hard Day's Night Page #26

PAUL:

Oh, I don't know, anyroad up, they

never are, are they?

GIRL:

(teasingly)

What are you?

PAUL:

I'm in a group... well... there are

four of us, we play and sing.

GIRL:

I bet you don't sound like real

people.

PAUL:

We do, you know. We sound like us

having a ball. It's fab.

GIRL:

Is it really fab or are you just

saying that to convince yourself?

PAUL:

What of? Look, I wouldn't do it unless

I was. I'm dead lucky 'cos I get

paid for doing something I love doing.

He laughs and with a gesture takes in the whole studio

PAUL:

...all this and a jam butty too!!

GIRL:

I only enjoy acting for myself. I

hate it when other people are let

in.

PAUL:

Why? I mean, which are you, scared

or selfish?

GIRL:

Why selfish?

PAUL:

Well, you've got to have people to

taste your treacle toffee.

She looks at him in surprise.

PAUL:

No, hang on, I've not gone daft. You

see, when I was little me mother let

me make some treacle toffee one time

in our back scullery. When I'd done

she said to me, "Go and give some to

the other kids." So, I said I would

but I thought to meself, "She must

think I'm soft." Anyroad, I was eating

away there but I wanted somebody

else to know how good it was so in

the end I wound up giving it all

away... but I didn't mind, mind,

'cos I'd made the stuff in the first

place. Well... that's why you need

other people... an audience... to

taste your treacle toffee, like.

Eh... does that sound as thickheaded

to you as it does to me?

GIRL:

Not really but I'm probably not a

toffee maker. How would you do those

lines of mine?

PAUL:

Well, look at it this way, I mean,

when you come right down to it, that

girl, she's a bit of a scrubber,

isn't she?

GIRL:

Is she?

PAUL:

Of course... Look, if she was a

Liverpool scrubber...

(Paul starts acting a

Liverpool girl, he

minces about then

turns, extending his

leg)

Eh, fella, you want to try pulling

the other one, it's got a full set

of bells hanging off it... Y'what?...

I know your sort, two cokes and a

packet of cheese and onion crisps

and suddenly it's love and we're

stopping in an empty shop doorway.

You're just after me body and y'can't

have it... so there!!

GIRL:

(shattered)

And you honestly think that's what

she meant?

PAUL:

Oh, definitely, it sticks out a mile,

she's trying to get him to marry her

but he doesn't want... well... I

don't reckon any fella's ever wanted

to get married. But girls are like

that, clever and cunning. You've got

to laugh.

He laughs.

GIRL:

Well, it's nice to know you think

we're clever.

PAUL:

(grinning)

And cunning.

GIRL:

And what do you do about it?

PAUL:

Me? Oh, I don't have the time, I'm

always running about with the lads...

no, we don't have the time.

GIRL:

Pity.

PAUL:

(not noticing the

invitation)

Aye, it is but as long as you get

by, it's all right, you know... bash

on, happy valley's when they let you

stop. Anyroad, I'd better get back.

GIRL:

Yes.

PAUL:

(going)

See you.

GIRL:

Of course.

PAUL stands at the doorway, shrugs then goes out.

EXTERIOR STREET:

In the street, workmen are collecting shovels, drinking tea

and doing all the things people do around building sites.

RINGO mooches around.

In the road is a hole with a diameter of about 3 feet, and

at least 6 feet deep. RINGO looks down and a man is busily

working at the bottom of the hole. He glares at RINGO. After

a moment RINGO turns away. We now see a very elegant young

lady coming towards RINGO. She is daintily avoiding a series

of puddles. RINGO has an idea and does a Sir Walter Raleigh

with his large Mac spreading it over one of the puddles. The

girl walks across it smiling graciously. RINGO proceeds with

the coat to the next puddle and to the next backing gradually

towards the hole.

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