A Kid in King Arthur's Court Page #2

Wait. Your Father

Sent You Here ?

[ Murmuring ]

I Cannot Lie To Thee, Sir.

My Father Knows Nothing Of

My Nocturnal Transgression.

Do Me A Favor.

Call Me "Calvin."

Calvin.

That Dance.

What Was It ?

Dance ?

You Know.

Oh. That's Not A Dance.

That's Karate.

You See, There Was This Big Kid

Who Was Beating Me Up Every Day

And Stealing My Lunch Money,

So My Dad Signed Me Up

For Karate School.

I Really Miss Them.

My Sister Too.

You Have No Idea

What I'm Talking About,

Do You ?

I Fear I Know Nothing Of

Karate Or Lunch Money,

But I Do Know

What It Is Like

To Miss One's Parents.

My Father Has Never Been

The Same Since Mother Died.

I Miss My Mother Deeply.

I Miss My Father Even More.

I Really Need

To Get Home, Katey.

Can You Help Me ?

I Truly Cannot.

Perhaps There Is

Somebody Who Can !

- Who ?

- Merlin.

- But You Said He Was Dead.

- Not Quite.

[ Rock Moving ]

Cool.

A Secret Door.

Come.

[ Rumbling ]

This Way.

[ Wind Whistling ]

We've Lost The Light !

[ Chuckles ]

No Problem.

It's Incredible !

[ Cal ]

Just Like

The Temple Of Doom.

This Is It.

[ Stones Creaking ]

These Were Once Merlin's

Quarters. 'Tis Now My

Father's Private Sanctuary.

[ Cal ]

Is That--

Aw, It Can't Be.

Oh, That. That's Just

Father's Old Sword.

"Old Sword" ?

That's Excalibur.

My, Thou Dost

Know A Lot.

I Watch A Lot Of Cnn.

No One's Touched It

In Years.

'Tis True.

Wow, You Even Have

A Hot Tub.

'Tis The Well Of Destiny.

Oh.

That Is All That

Remains Of Merlin.

If There Is A Way Home,

It Will Be In There.

Sweet.

Quick.

Someone Comes.

Hurry !

Here Is Where

We Must Part.

There's Something

Very Special About You,

Calvin Of Reseda.

Perhaps Your Arrival Here

Was No Accident.

Hey, How Do I Get Back ?

Follow The Wall.

It Stops At Your Quarters.

Good Night, Sir.

Ah, The Knight I Sent For.

Come To The Well

So That I May Gaze

Upon The Face Of Greatness.

Who Said That ?

Come.

Come.

We Haven't Much Time.

Is Someone Down There ?

What Are You Doing Here, Boy ?

Stand Aside So I May See

My Great Warrior.

Where Is He ?

Come, Come.

Step Forward.

Um, I Hate To Tell You This,

But I'm The Only One Here.

- You Must Be Joking.

- No.

You're Merlin, Right ?

Something Has Gone

Horribly Wrong. What Was

That Wretched Spell I Cast ?

Half A Quart Of Pig Vomit

And The Two Monkey Bladders ?

- Pig Vomit ?

- Or Was It

The Other Way Around ?

Good Lord !

Oh, I Get It.

This Is All A Big Mistake.

That's Okay.

Everybody Picks Me Last.

No, I Couldn't

Have Got It Wrong.

But Look At You !

What Manner Of Armor

Is That ? And That Animal

Sleeping On Your Head.

Animal ?

It's My Hair !

Look, Your Wetness,

I Don't Understand

Any Of This.

- And What Am I Doing Here ?

- I Brought You Here...

To Save Camelot.

- Me ?

- Arthur Is In Trouble. His

Kingdom Has Been Shattered...

By The Iron Fist

Of Lord Belasco.

Oh, The Dork

In The Purple Dress.

We've Met.

And You Haven't Seen

The Last Of Him.

He Is A Dangerous Man.

He Means To Steal Camelot

From Arthur. And You...

Are Going To Stop Him.

Look, You Definitely

Have The Wrong Guy.

Why Don't You

Just Send Me Home ? I Mean,

My Family Really Needs Me.

Camelot Needs You !

[ Groaning ]

Help Arthur

Find His Way Back,

And I Will Help You

Find Yours.

[ Sighs ]

[ Battle Cry,

Shield Clanging ]

Nicely Done.

Thank You.

Now, Would You

Care To Show Us How

It Is Done In Reseda ?

Uh, Actually I Was

Hoping For A Desk Job.

As From Today,

You're A Knight

In Training.

Thanks, But I Won't

Be Here That Long.

Don't Tell Me...

A Brave Lad Like You,

Who Faced The Full Fury

Of The Black Knight,

Is Afraid Of A Dummy.

Uh, No Way.

I Was Just Testing You.

[ Clangs ]

God, These Things

Are A Lot Heavier

Than They Look On Tv.

"Tv" ? One Of Your

Knights Of Reseda,

No Doubt ?

Uh, Something Like That.

Good Fit.

Can You See ?

Perfectly.

Oh, It Smells Like

Something Died In Here.

Excuse Me.

[ Grunting ]

- [ Kane ] This Way.

- [ Cal ] Yeah, I Knew That.

There. Whoa !

Calvin ?

Yeah ?

Remember Three Things:

Lean In.

Protect Your Steed.

Fix A Point On Your

Opponent's Person

And Have At Him.

That's Four Things.

What ?

Never Mind.

Hit It.

Ah !

[ Splashing ]

Well, I'd Like To See

You Try That.

I Thought All Knights

Spent Their Time Rescuing

Damsels And Fighting Dragons.

What Are They All

Doing Here ?

They're All Training Hard

For The Big Tournament.

You See, The Prize

Is Quite Appealing

To All Men Of Royal Blood.

Really ?

What's The Prize ?

My Sister.

And Camelot.

What About Her ?

Doesn't She Have A Choice ?

She Has Refused All Suitors.

Therefore,

On Her 21st Birthday,

The Tournament

Must Decide For Her.

Bummer.

I Think I Agree.

Come. You Try.

[ Cat Screeching ]

You Are The Most

Exquisite Flower

In This Garden, Princess.

There Is One Major Difference

Between The Garden Flowers

And Myself, Lord Belasco.

Mmm ?

A Rose Will Prick You,

But I Will Do Far Worse.

You Cut Me To The Quick.

All I Want

Is What Is Best For My King

And His Kingdom.

Camelot Could Be Great.

We Could Make It Great Again.

"We" ?

Yes, Of Course.

The Two Of Us Together,

In Wedded Bliss.

I Will Marry The Man

Who Wins The Tournament.

Enter It...

If You Have The Nerve.

Good Day, Sir.

So, Master Kane,

Where's Your Castle ?

Oh, I Have No Land

Of My Own.

Does That Mean

You Can't Enter

The Tournament ?

Alas, The Tournament

Is Reserved For

Far Better Men Than I.

No Way.

You're The Best.

If Thou Art Trying

To Get On My Good Side,

Thou Has Succeeded

With Royal Colors.

Ah. Here Is Thy Opponent.

Wait !

I Can't Fight The Princess.

You Are Right

About That, Sir.

Come.

I Wonder.

Do The Knights

Of Reseda Swim ?

You Have Much To Learn

Before Supper.

I Hear The Kitchen Is Serving

A Poached Goat's Head

In A Brown Grub Sauce.

Oh !

Or Perhaps We Could

Catch Yon Goose.

[ Grunting ]

Oh. Whoa !

[ Laughing ]

Oh, Geez.

I Cannot Believe

I Fell For The Oldest

Trick In The Book.

Then Again,

Since I'm Here,

Maybe It's The Newest

Trick In The Book.

Hey. How's It Goin' ?

Ah, Good Sir. My Shop

Is At Your Service.

Really ? Well, Thanks. Uh,

I Hear You Can Make Anything.

Indeed, I Have

That Reputation.

What About This ?

By The Circle Builders

Themselves.

Well, I Need

Another Pair,

Like, Yesterday.

Ah.

- Who's There ?

- I Trust You Slept Well ?

Yeah. We All Did-- Me

And The Forest Of Crawling

Things Living In My Bed.

All Right.

Come. Breakfast Is Served

In The Great Hall. We Must

Hurry Or We'll Be Late.

Just A Minute.

I Have Somethin'

To Show Ya.

What Is It For ?

[ Princess Gasping,

Both Laughing ]

Come On.

This Way.

Oh, Careful.

Come On.

So If It's "Bad,"

It's Good.

Right.

And If It's "Cool,"

It's Hot.

Oh, I Fear I Will Never

Understand Your Valley Speak.

Well, Belasco. What Dost Thou

Wish To Speak About ?

Decisions, Your Highness.

It's Time You Made One.

What Didst Thou

Have In Mind ?

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