A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy Page #7

Ich grolle nicht

Und wenn das Herz auch bricht

Ewig verlor'nes Lieb!

Ewig verlor'nes Lieb!

- I love you. Don't get married.

- Ssh.

- I can't live without you. I'm serious.

- What a childish thing to do in the barn.

- Do you have any feelings for me at all?

- I don't know.

- How will you ever if you get married?

- I won't.

- Meet me later.

- Go away.

- By the brook at midnight.

- Don't cause trouble!

Give me a chance! I haven't

had a single free moment

to show you how charming I can be.

Your charm is apparent,

but that's not enough.

Why are you so stubborn?

Do you love Andrew?

- How dare you!

- You protest too strongly.

- I love Leopold.

- You don't. He'd run a poor third.

- You're rude.

- You're adorable. And Andrew's married.

(Leopold continues singing)

(Maxwell whispers)

Go away, will you?

We've both had too much wine.

How can you resist? The moon is full.

You're about to be married for ever.

This is your last free night.

Spend it with me.

Ten minutes, just talking. I know if

you knew me better, you'd like me.

You don't want to get married with the

nagging thought "Maybe I should have."

"Maybe if I'd given him ten minutes,

he would have changed my mind."

"But now it's too late.

I'm the professor's wife."

"Secure, it's true, yet something's

missing. Maybe if I'd acted..."

Stop it!

- Marriage is the death of hope.

- It is not.

- No, not with the right person.

- I don't love you.

Because you don't know me.

Give me ten minutes. Ten lousy minutes.

If you don't, I'll kill myself right after

the wedding. This time I won't miss.

(whispering continues)

All right! OK, I'll meet you.

- You promise?

- Go away.

If you don't come,

the guilt will haunt you for ever.

- (Adrian) Ariel, come play for a while.

- All right.

Yes, why don't you?

I feel like something devotional.

I love your accompaniment. You have

a way of caressing the words I sing.

(Ariel plays)

Our Father

Which art in heaven

Hallowed be...

- (door closes)

- What are you slamming the door for?

He doesn't sound that bad.

Is something the matter? You've got

a funny look on your face. Are you OK?

Andrew, kiss me.

(Andrew gasps)

- What are you doing?

- I want to make love to you.

Adrian, what's the matter with you?

Adrian, stop! Adrian! Adrian, stop that!

- Adrian, we've got guests in the house.

- Yeah, that makes it a little dangerous.

Adrian, stop it. Adrian! This is

the kitchen table! What are you doing?

Adrian! I cannot have intercourse

where we eat oatmeal.

I want you right now!

Adrian, stop this. You're crazy.

Stop it!

Adrian, there's a fork under me.

Oh, stop that.

Look, I broke an egg!

This is like a Flemish painting.

- Get those pants off!

- Ssh, quiet!

There's a man in the next room singing

the Lord's Prayer. We'll go blind!

- Adrian! Adrian, I'm on the burner.

- Kiss me.

(Leopold) Lead us not into temptation

But deliver us from evil

For thine is the Kingdom

(moaning)

What are you doing?

- Don't stop.

- (Adrian pants)

I suddenly feel panicky.

You can't stop now.

I'm past the point of no return.

I feel a lot of fear

in the bottom of my stomach.

Yeah, but you're gonna

have to pack me in ice.

I can't. It's disgusting.

How can it be?

I don't have my clothes off yet.

I'm sorry, Andrew.

I really wanted to. You know that.

I just... suddenly...

I became aware of myself, of the others.

I could feel my heart beating.

You don't feel it for me any more. Face it.

Oh, look.

Maybe I don't. I don't know what I feel.

I know one thing.

I can't go on like this any more.

(Leopold) What about the spirit world,

Andrew? We're all waiting.

(Andrew) OK, everyone, I can't

guarantee this thing is gonna work.

You're a man of science.

What are your views on an unseen world?

I don't believe in ghosts,

though I almost became one before.

- I believe in science and sex.

- Not love?

Yes. Love at first sight.

- Can there be love without sex?

- I think the two can be totally different.

- How?

- Sex alleviates tension and love causes it.

Think about that for a minute.

OK, join hands, everyone. Everyone,

just hold your hand. Everyone, relax.

I'm dealing here with ectoplasm

and animal magnetism.

Everyone, concentrate on the ball

and make your mind a blank.

- Can we look at it?

- You can look at it, yeah.

OK, relax. Please, take this seriously.

Keep concentrating.

Just relax.

Concentrate.

Concentrate.

Just relax.

(tinkling)

Look at that! Look, isn't that fantastic?

- (Dulcy) Oh, it's wonderful.

- It's working!

- We went swimming there.

- It's the brook.

- (Ariel) It's a person. Some man.

- (Adrian) It's Andrew! No, it's Maxwell.

It's Andrew. It's neither of them.

- (Ariel) He's waiting.

- (Adrian) For who?

(Dulcy) A woman.

- He's alone. She never came.

- (Andrew) Is this looking into the past?

- (Leopold) It's an optical illusion.

- There's someone in a dress.

- They're just talking.

- Why doesn't he kiss her?

- I know he wants to.

- I wonder why he doesn't.

- He's too timid.

- She really wants him to.

(Ariel) She does want him to.

You can see. She's straining too.

- (Adrian) But he just isn't.

- (Maxwell) He's missing his chance.

(Adrian) It's so sad.

(Dulcy) Isn't it true, the best

opportunities only happen once?

- Careful, Andrew.

- You got something to pour on it?

- Take that away from there.

- The house'll burn down.

- You've really invented something.

- Yeah, but what?

- Give it time. It'll die down.

- I hope so. I can't seem to put it out.

There, you see? That explains it.

Movement is no miracle.

The retina retains an image for 1/16th

of a second, flickering lights...

- Quite explainable.

- Is it?

But what did we see?

The past, the present, the future?

Maybe it was the spirit world

and those were two ghosts.

There are no ghosts,

except in Shakespeare.

And many of those are more real

than many people that I know.

Come along, Ariel. Time to go to bed.

Thank you, everyone. Lovely dinner.

Thank you for dinner.

- Marvellous demonstration.

- I think I'd better go to bed too.

Adrian, dinner was super. Thank you.

Goodnight, Andrew.

- I was always scared of ghosts.

- Andrew's got everything under control.

- (Andrew) Aren't you coming to bed?

- (Maxwell) I'm gonna stay up for a while.

- I'm not tired.

- (Andrew) Really? You're just gonna...

- (Maxwell) Get a little air.

- (Andrew) No kidding.

A little. It's such a pretty night.

- Oh. Where's Dulcy?

- She's exhausted.

Uh-huh.

It's funny, Maxwell. You don't seem

as depressed now as you were before.

- I'm not.

- No?

- I'm much better.

- Good. I like to hear that.

How come, Maxwell?

Why do you feel better?

Well, I guess if marriage

is the death of hope,

then the night before marriage,

there's still hope.

Where do you think

you're gonna walk at this hour?

- Just around, under the stars.

- You think maybe down by the brook?

- Why are you so concerned? Go to sleep.

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