Ali's Wedding Page #4

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Getting high

Getting high

Our president is getting high

Stop there, please. Stop.

Very good.

I think we need to make

the dance less suggestive.

Can I speak with the Baathists, please?

Sheikhna, should I shave the beard?

Allahu Akbar. I am Saddam...

Ali.

So what did you think of today's...

immunoglobulin genetic diversity lecture?

I found it...

intense.

You know,we might...

travel to uni together sometimes?

Swap notes?

Great.

Test each other.

Great.

Thank you.

After you.

No, after you.

But, you're to my right.

Now you're to my right.

But, you...

You two dancing, or are you in this tute?

Yeah.

No, they swapped me over into this so...

I am looking for my son, the doctor.

Ali Albasri.

Call him for me.

You know how we've been talking,

student to student?

I thought maybe we could talk

male to female, you know? Speak speak.

I mean, not now, but when you're ready.

How would you know when I'm ready?

Morning all.

Morning.

Right, everyone.

- Alicia, here, is Patient X.

- Hi.

I need a volunteer

to take her case history.

You. Briefcase.

Your face is not familiar.

Yeah, I was swapped over.

Ali.

OK, Ali. Come down.

This is a 26-year-old female

who comes into the GP Clinic.

You're a second-year GP intern.

Take her history.

- So, I'm the doctor?

- You're the doctor.

- Good afternoon, Alicia.

- Afternoon.

Thanks for coming to my clinic.

What seems to be the problem

this afternoon?

I have a really weird discharge.

Huh.

That's no good.

Not good.

What do you mean, he's not on the list?

He was first at the mosque to get in.

- I'll find him myself.

- Sorry, you can't go in there.

So with the discharge,

did you see it first,

smell it, or hear it?

I saw it, and then I smelled it,

but it didn't make a noise.

Come.

Oh, sh*t.

No wonder we couldn't find him.

He is operating. See?

These people say they don't know you.

- Is this your teacher?

- Sorry. Family emergency.

- Is he a good teacher?

- He's one of the greats, Mum.

OK. Back up here.

Our two families are having tea.

You need to dress up.

Hello, Ayoob? Hey, bro.

With this tea ceremony,

what do I do not to get married?

Spoon in? Spoon out?

Do I drink the tea? Not drink the tea?

Relax... but listen carefully.

So, you grab the sugar.

- I thought ours didn't have the sugar?

- No, it does. Oh, wait...

Look, forget the sugar for the moment.

The most important thing

is when you drink the tea...

- OK, so when do I drink the tea?

- Unbelievable, man.

Ayoob?

If you don't want to get married, Ali...

Oh my...

When do I drink the tea?

No!

Don't operate until I see her.

And how is the play?

Oh, excellent.

My Ali is very gifted.

Although his primary concern,

as you have witnessed firsthand,

is to be a great surgeon one day.

- That is so balanced of him.

- Indeed.

He plays five instruments.

I must say,

I never thought of Saddam Hussein

as being this handsome.

Really, it was an issue.

Saddam was an ugly, fat man,

and my boy, well...

- You can see with your eyes.

- Indeed.

My own daughter.

I wish she could hide her beauty

behind a false mustache.

Speaking of my angel.

- She is beautiful.

- Of course.

Sheikhna.

Please, try my baklava.

Thank you, Yomna.

He drinks the tea,

before I have given my approval.

The boy is so eager to marry.

It is done.

My doctor son is engaged.

Very unorthodox with the sugar business,

but we are here.

A thousand blessings

on our newly engaged couple.

Two faiths, under one roof.

You are quiet.

Our son is speechless with joy.

I will call everybody tonight.

You liked the tea?

It was tea.

That will show all those women

who thought you would be single forever.

Or worse.

It's my degree.

How can I be a proper husband

when I'm studying?

You father fought in a war,

studied for two decades,

and fathered four children

all at once.

Mom, I'm not as good as Dad.

I need to focus.

Maybe he is right.

After all, this is Australia.

People only do one thing at a time.

Perhaps I could convince Haj Karim

and the other witnesses

to hold off the announcement.

Maybe the end of your first year

is better.

And you, no calls.

Just three calls.

No, not even half a call.

Woman.

The son of the cleric

says he's in tutorials with you.

My name's Dianne.

Is it true?

Completely. My name is Dianne, see?

Is it true, Dianne?

- What, you want 100 points of ID?

- Is it true he's in tutorials with you?

He. You mean Ali?

What do you have against him?

I have worked...

day and night to get where I am.

I deserve to be here.

I don't like to see the son of the cleric

getting an easy ride.

He's not a good Muslim.

You should know that.

So, I will ask you again...

is he in tutorials with you,

as he says he is?

Dianne.

Yeah, he comes to every session.

And he's the second smartest student

in my class, Luay.

Why did you do the "potato pot-ah-to"

speech at the mosque?

It was a spontaneous speech.

You didn't get 96.4, did you?

- It's complicated.

- What are you doing here?

I'm doing the study, just... not enrolled.

What, so in six years you're gonna

become a pretend doctor,

and treat pretend patients?

The Prophet said it's not the end result,

it's the intention.

I'm doing it for my dad.

You of all people

should know what it's like.

Dianne, ever since I was a kid,

I was introduced as Doctor Ali this,

and Surgeon Ali that.

I didn't have the guts to tell him

I was Moron Ali,

and now I have to carry this.

- A briefcase?

- It's my older brother's.

He was the smart one.

He should have been the great surgeon,

but insteadhe had to go

and step on a f***ing landmine.

You know what? It's...

It's my problem.

I won't bother you with it again...

We're out of milk.

How about the 100 Chupa Chups?

Charlie, do you even want to do medicine?

It doesn't matter now.

But, yes, I'd like to help people.

I'll help you.

You helped me get in.

I'll help you get in.

What's the most common disorder

of the autonomic nervous system

that can impede systemic circulation?

- I know it's not good.

- Great. What's it responsible for?

The heart?

Ali, the hardest thing in the world for me

has been getting in. I can't waste time.

Tell me when you've studied it properly.

One of the most common disorders

is the long-standing diabetic damage

to the autonomic nerves.

They call it the...

diabetic autonomic neuropathy.

Give me the physiologyof what happens

to your cardiovascular system

out of a warm bed.

Give me to lunchtime.

Your blood pressure would drop

immediately,

and your heartwould contract

and beat more rapidly and vigorously,

as your arteries increase their tone,

and then your blood pressure recovers.

Like everyday when I see you.

No, Dianne. I'm sorry.

- Were you talking to her?

- Yeah, about the last lecture.

Oh, the causes of cirrhosis?

- What were they again?

- Why? Weren't you listening?

Alcohol abuse, viruses, Hep A, B, C...

No, not A, just B and C.

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