Ali's Wedding Page #6

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I do.

For six weeks.

- We've witnessed this solemn proceeding.

- So, kiss her.

We shouldgive

this temporary marriage thing a go.

I will never, ever be caught.

Yeah!

Master Saddam stay defiant

You will never be caught

Let the US and their allies

Come attacking

I have backing

Yes, yes, master

We have your back

No, no, Saddam

We will attack

All your secrets will be open.

Master Saddam, the Americans crashed

through the gates. We must run.

What happened?

No!

Allahu Akbar.

Come on, Saddam.

Nuke them with your might and power.

There are no WMDs.

I had to fake it...

Till I make it.

All these years he lied to us

He lied to us

He lied to us

No. It cannot end like this.

You will be caught

You will be caught

You will be caught

You will be caught

You will be caught

We're going to Broadway.

Broadway? Unbelievable, man.

No!

No one said Broadway.

It is theBin Khattabi multipurpose hall.

How does that even sound like Broadway?

It is a Muslim community hall in Detroit.

We're going to Detroit?

- Detroit. Unbelievable, man.

- Yes.

Our dear friend, Dr. Hasoon Albandar...

He is the brother-in-law

to the Iraqi ambassador in the US.

He saw the show and loved it.

He made one phone call

and we have been invited to perform it

live in Detroit

Sheikhna, won't thatmeanwe'll be serving

the devil regime of the USA?

Luay will not be needed.

Principal cast only.

So your conscience can remain guilt-free,

Seyyed.

I'm not going to Detroit?

Bro, the mustache.

You've got your hair out.

And you've got a stupid mustache.

Oh yeah. Hey, listen.

- I found a way for us to stay together.

- We are together.

No, together together. Forever.

The play's going to America.

- What?

- Yeah.

That's amazing.

- You are so good.

- Really?

I was really proud.

This is God,

the author of destinies and will.

He's talking to me.

He's laying out the path for us.

- Slow down, Charlie.

- God wants me to disappear.

In the States, I'm going to call Dad,

away from the mosque,

away from the community.

I'm gonna tell him the truth.

I'm gonna stay there and not come back.

- I don't want you to go.

- No, hear me out.

- I'll drop medicine...

- You were never doing medicine.

I'm going to get work there, as an actor.

Hollywood always needspeople like us

to play terrorists.

And then you can join me.

You come over, we get married,

and we stay there

until our parents forgive us.

This sounds like one of your plans.

We can't just run away.

- I'm not turning my back on medicine.

- No, you mustn't.

There's great medical schools there.

- This is insane.

- No, it's more than insane.

But we're Muslim.

What other options have we got?

In America we can live like Australians.

Do you really want to be with me forever?

Please don't.

Please. Charlie...

Dianne. I want to marry you.

And not temporary.

Sh*t.

- What?

- Fish bone.

Dianne.

I've never known, ever,

what I've wanted, but...

This I know.

Don't you want to marry me?

What have you done with my glasses?

They'll be on his stupid head.

Please, just think about it.

I'll call you as soon as I've settled.

Tell us one more time.

We like hearing your Aussie accent.

How many times do I have to tell you?

It's a musical, a comedy.

It's a funny play about Saddam Hussein.

- We don't tend to laugh at terrorism.

- Terrorism?

It's on your phone.

What have you guys planted on my phone?

"We will come back and kill them."

That's not mine.

Your words.

"I'll have front row seats."

- What?

- "I will watch them suffer."

"The bombers will slaughter you."

Should I keep reading this obscenity?

Name the bombers.

The Bombers.

The Bombers are a footie team.

AFL.

Aussie rules. You guys have NFL here.

We've got AFL.

Those were text messages

I sent to my mate, Wazza.

Because he's an idiot Magpie fan.

Got to admire the guile of these guys.

They concoct a pro-American play,

sell out to a thousand crazed zealots

in Detroit,

and then hide

all their sicko terrorist messages

behind a football team.

Wow.

No.

I've got to be in Detroit.

I've got to disappear.

It's God's plan.

Ladies and gentlemen,

this is your captain speaking.

I'll ask you to fasten your seat belts.

We'll have turbulence

on our descent into Melbourne.

A few bumps ahead, I'm afraid.

Ali.

I will ask you this once and once only.

All I want is a straight answer.

Are you doing medicine?

Did you get the score

you told everyone you got?

Sheikhna, don't be too hard on the boy.

I was trying to let them know

you were overseas

and they told me you weren't enrolled.

So naturally we thought

that there must be a mistake.

But, alas.

When have I given you the impression

I am your enemy?

Or worse, a dictator?

Or...

You couldn't come to me

and tell me straight?

"Dad.

I failed. I'm sorry.

I tried, but not to be."

- I'm sorry, Dad.

- Sorry, nothing.

You will apologize to the community.

I am done.

The Prophet has said

that lying is a sin,

which burns away at the soul

as fire burns through wood.

Hence,

I stand before you,

and before God,

offering my repentance.

Assalamu 'Alaikum.

We've now heard it.

Where to now? I hear everyone ask.

Sheikh Mahdi has done a reasonable job

raising his children.

I don't see the need

for our sheikh to step down immediately.

However, if my son

had been a lying failure,

I know in my heart,

I could not live with the shame.

Sheikhna, what if the boy gets married?

To atone and prove he is a man.

Abu Faisal.

Please.

It is with great pain,

I must reveal another,

yet more shocking truth.

I, unwittingly,

while driving my taxi,

stumbled upon Ali

with a loose Muslim woman,

at places not consistent

with our religion.

A bowling alley.

An aquarium.

The picture resolution is not perfect,

but if you zoom in...

What is this fool on about?

Tell me this was not you.

No!

Haj Karim.

You offered Ali

your daughter's hand in marriage,

and he has betrayed her

with another woman.

It helps no one to name names.

The girl knows who she is.

That's what happens

when we let our women go to university.

Seyyed, please.

Why are you doing this to her?

Please, sir.

It's not her fault. Please.

I beg you.

Nothing improper happened.

She's guiltless.

I trusted you.

You've shamed me.

It's not her fault.

You've shamed me.

I think you have said enough.

Dianne, wait.

I've never touched Yomna.

My parents, the community...

They all arranged it for me.

Believe me.

Why would I do that?

You've told so many lies,

you have no soul left.

Everything about you is just a lie.

No, everything except you is a lie.

Do you get what you've done, Ali?

I can't do medicine.

He's going to send me back to Lebanon.

You have f***ed up my life.

- OK. I'll talk to your dad.

- You've f***ed up my life.

Don't talk to anyone, ever.

Sit in a cave for the rest of your life.

- Just leave me the f*** alone.

- But I love you.

I absolutely hate you. I hate you.

I hate you. I divorce you.

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