Beethoven's Big Break Page #4

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Run home to your

daddy and mommy.

Wait, that's right.

You don't have a mommy.

Lewis, stop it.

Hey, did you have

fun with your friends?

You're late.

I'm sorry.

We were on the set.

You okay?

I'm great.

Cut it out!

You're such a nerd,

Beethoven.

BILLY:
Hey, Dad,

there's that crazy lady.

EDDIE:
Yup. That's her.

Come on, boy.

Oh!

Uh...

Hi.

Hi.

Why are you on our steps?

Oh...

I'm trying to write a script.

Oh.

That's a weird place

to do it.

Let's go, Beethoven.

I'm starving.

Thank you.

I was hoping maybe I could come

in and watch the dog for a bit.

Watch the dog?

Yeah, get some inspiration.

I'm suffering from

a little writer's block.

Patricia and Stanley

are really pressuring me.

Can you watch the dog

while you eat?

Probably.

Yes, I can do that.

Come on.

(BEEPS)

How's your kung pow chicken?

It's good, thanks.

How's your... What is that?

Vegetable lasagna.

(INHALES)

Delicious.

Mine is still frozen.

Do you want me to put

that back in the microwave?

No, I kind of like it.

It's like a macaroni

and cheese Popsicle.

Do you guys have microwave

dinners every night?

No.

Sometimes we have pizza.

Or burgers.

Right?

Really a couple

of bachelors, huh?

We do okay.

Oh!

No, I'm sure. I can see.

LISA:
So I hear

you named Beethoven.

Yeah. He really likes

that classical stuff.

Cool. Maybe I'll put

that in the script.

Yeah?

If it's okay with you.

Yeah. Yeah. Of course.

Billy, finish

licking your food.

So...

I'm beat.

Okay.

Big day tomorrow.

Right.

I'm gonna go to bed.

Good night.

Do you... Do you have a home?

Oh.

You're right. I should leave.

Do I have to?

I have no idea what to write.

There is no scene

written for tomorrow.

I'm gonna be fired.

You know,

I got fired this week.

It seems to lead to

promotion in this business.

So why don't you just stay

here as long as you like? Work.

I'm sure you'll come up

with something great.

Really?

Yeah.

Hey, Eddie?

I just wanted to say thanks.

You're nice, Lizard Guy.

Thanks.

Good night.

She thinks you're nice,

Lizard Guy.

(GROANS IN DISGUST)

God.

(BARKING)

Come on! This is my bed!

(LAUGHS)

Oh, ha, ha.

You think this is funny?

This is not funny.

It is, actually. And I think I

have our scene for tomorrow. Thanks.

Kissed me all over my neck!

You went to first base

on my neck.

SAL:
This is our target.

He answers to Beethoven.

Yes.

Good name.

Shut up.

He's big, and he's strong.

But soon he will be ours.

But what if they don't

pay the ransom again?

Well, this time

they will pay the ransom.

Which is why we are

waiting for the film

to almost be complete

before we nab him.

The studio thinks he's

their next big star, so yes,

they will pay the ransom,

and I will get my revenge.

They better. 'Cause I don't

want another dumb dog

running around here again.

(GROWLING)

Take it back.

What?

Take back what you

just said about Frizzy.

No.

Frizzy loves you!

There will not be another

dog running around here,

whether they pay

the ransom or not.

What do you mean?

They fired me.

They humiliated me.

So, yes, we will

take Beethoven.

Yes, they will

pay the ransom.

But, no,

they will never see

their darling dog again.

(GRUNTS)

(SQUEAKING)

Hey, hey.

Come on, that's not for you.

Stay.

(SNIFFING)

Really?

(WHIMPERING)

Hey, watch it!

There he is.

Come on, buddy.

Heel, heel, heel.

Hey, hey, hey.

There's my guy.

Hi.

Who's a movie star?

You are, that's who!

How'd you sleep last night?

You look great.

Hey, what are

you feeding him?

Is he gaining weight?

It look like he's been

working out. It shows.

If this dog looks tubby on

screen, you're out of a job.

Guess what we got

for you, Beethoven?

Come on, man.

Come on. Come on, man.

Come on. Come on.

Let's see what we got.

Ta-da!

Whoa!

It's iust a little token.

A very expensive token.

Hey, you're a star now,

and everybody is going to

start treating you like that.

I mean, that trailer

is bigger than my house.

Stanley, tell him

about the staff.

Yeah, the staff.

Come on out, fellows.

Staff?

This is so insane.

Voil.

Beethoven,

that's your entourage.

Okay, come on.

A chef? A masseuse?

Personal groomers?

I'm surprised you guys didn't

get the Dog Whisperer!

Dog Whisperer!

Here I am.

Calm and assertive.

This is...

This is ridiculous.

(HUSHING)

This is Hollywood.

What the...

(SIGHS)

I thought I was

the star of this movie.

Here you go!

Home sweet home!

Wow.

(EDDIE WHISTLES)

Wow.

Hey! Hey, hey,

get off the couch!

No! No, no, that's his couch!

Get off the chair.

What?

Look, you see that pile

of scripts over there?

Okay, these are scripts

that this studio

would like to do with

that star over there,

the one smelling

his own bottom.

I'm attached to produce.

You're the trainer.

Everybody wins.

Unless you rock the boat.

So look at it like this,

don't screw up.

Train Beethoven

and let that dog put us

on the front page of Varety.

Okay?

Okay.

Okay.

Here you go, honey.

Whenever you have a minute.

Take your time.

He's gorgeous.

Thanks.

What are you smiling at?

(FARTS)

When's my next appointment?

Just quit it.

Hello?

Beethoven, where are you?

(SCREAMS)

May I help you?

Sal?

(SPEAKING SPANISH)

Sal, I know it's you.

Well, of course it's me.

I'm ioking, obviously.

What are you doing here?

What am I doing here?

Hey, pal. I got a pass.

I work here

on the incredibly popular

Anmals Gone Wld.

We shoot right over here,

on the main stage, on the lot.

That is what I'm doing here.

I meant, what are you doing

here, spying on my dog?

That. That. Just came

by to say hello. Hello.

Came by to see

the big fellow.

How're you doing?

Beethoven, he's beautiful!

Look at that big fellow.

Come to Daddy. Come to Daddy.

(BARKS)

(GROWLING)

Wow. Get that beast

away from me!

I don't think

he likes you very much, Sal.

Hey, good luck

with your new job.

I sure am enjoying

your old one.

Come on, boy. Come on.

He's a bad man,

but you're a good boy.

You're a good boy!

EDDIE:
All right.

Now, listen to me.

I want you to roll over,

you understand?

Come on, no. No. Come back!

Roll. Roll over.

They're kind of dorky,

aren't they?

Actually, yeah.

But in a good way.

Sit. Come on.

My dad says you really

don't like Beethoven,

that you would prefer

a baybreeze frizay.

(LAUGHING) Bichon fris.

How would your dad

know what I prefer?

Well, he says you're more brainy and

refined and meant for bigger things.

Bigger than what?

Us, I guess.

EDDIE:
Come on, now.

I wouldn't be so sure.

He said you were pretty, too.

(CHUCKLING) He did, did he?

No. But you are!

Thank you, Billy.

I think you're

teaching my dad

how to be more

brainy and refined.

Oh?

Whoa!

Oh!

But it's not easy.

Oh.

STANLEY:
Prep 52A, and we'll

knock that out and call it a day.

All right, quiet people!

I hear way too much talking!

If you wanna have fun,

go to the dentist.

So what does our beautiful

Beethoven have in store for us today?

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