Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk Page #3

with graphite alloy rims.

And I chased after him with a tire iron.

Just, uh... I just wanted to see him run.

My dad, uh...

My dad was able to get him

to drop the charges

if I went to the recruiter's

office the next day.

No regrets, Sergeant.

Hey, y'all. Look! It's you!

Ladies and gentlemen,

America's sport proudly honors

America's heroes.

- Welcome, heroes of AI-Ansakar Canal.

- Beyonc!

Put a lid on it, Sykes.

Staff Sergeant David Dime,

Sergeant Antonio Holliday,

Specialist William Lynn,

Specialist Marcellino Montoya,

Specialist Theodore Yang,

Specialist Robert Earl Koch,

Private Lodis Beckwith

and Private Kenneth Sykes.

USA!

If you suffer

from erectile dysfunction,

it could be due to inadequate blood flow...

Figures.

Sergeant, request permission

to switch seats.

Permission denied, Specialist Lynn.

You will take it for the team.

Move out and draw fire.

Roger that.

Hi. I saw you on the TV.

It was just like a movie.

I was just so proud.

You guys are the best.

I'm right there with you.

No. Not with you in Iraq, but...

My cousin's girlfriend's brother

is also serving in Iraq.

You remind of my dear late husband, Fred.

I wear a uniform, too, but...

I must have watched your video, like...

Then we could drop a big one on Fallujah.

But you boys, you're the real thing.

Your supreme sacrifice.

Keep you in my heart.

Just like it says in the 89th Psalm.

Gettin' 72 virgins in Heaven. Why 72?

- Thank you.

- Yes, sir.

- Good job.

- Good job.

Very cool.

Josh, man, I'm starving right now.

Can we please stop and

get a slice of pizza,

- a hot dog, something?

- Uh, I'm sorry, man, we just...

We have to head to the end zone

now for the video shoot.

- What video shoot?

- They didn't tell you guys?

You're gonna be starring

in the official team greeting.

- Go America!

- Wait, what about...

What about halftime, Josh?

I am still waiting on intel from HQ.

"Intel"? "HQ"?

That's, like, G.I. Joe talk, Josh.

Hey, but seriously, Josh,

you're gonna look out for us, right?

We don't want to look like

a bunch of morons on TV. Understand?

- Of course.

- You are a soldier, Mango.

Just be prepared.

Yeah, but prepared for what,

is what I'm trying to find out.

For whatever. Have you not learned this yet

from being in Iraq?

You see, in Iraq, people just try to kill

you, not make you look like a douche bag.

Oh, sh*t. Don't worry about that, bro.

You'll always be a douche bag in my book.

Okay, okay, guys, it's gonna be fine.

But sorry, one second.

Where's Major McLaurin?

Sh*t.

Lodis, Sykes, go find Major Mac.

Bring him to the end zone.

- Yes, Sarge.

- Josh?

- Advil?

- Oh, sh*t, sh*t. Sorry.

I'm sorry. Sorry. Yes, yes.

I will definitely get

that for you right away.

Okay. Okay, so you guys

can just wait right here,

and I will go tell them that we're ready.

- Wait, there's Major Mac.

- Wonders never cease.

So, so let's get this straight.

You say you want the shooting,

you want stuff blowing up,

but no swearing and no smoking?

That guy ever come up for air?

It's cool, man.

- Man's closing our deal.

- Better be.

My mom's gonna be pissed

if I don't get her that car, man.

Hey, Billy. Go long.

You got it!

Whoa...

Specialist Lynn

comes through in the clutch!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's Steven.

That's Steven. I gotta call you back.

It's Steven. He's calling. Okay, bye.

- Hey! Let's go! Let's go!

- Ready, aim, fire!

- Play football, Albert?

- I play a little bit.

- Get off me!

- Get the hell off my field!

Get off now! Get off!

Mango, Mango, Mango!

'Hey, you! Get Off!

I think we need to get off the field.

- Go! Go!

- Let 'em play!

- Get off! Get off!

- Dude!

Off! Let go of that ball! Get

off the field! Get off...

- Put him down!

- I'm taking this Viet Cong off your...

You boys better watch out.

That gentleman's pretty touchy

about his field.

Hey, game's over, boys. Come on, rally up.

- Let's go, guys, let's go.

- Aw.

Hey, the man don't care

about our sacrifices, sir.

Keeping his ass safe from WMDs and stuff.

Well, to be fair, he does do a good job

keeping up the grounds.

Hey, Mango.

Doesn't all that green make you

just want to crank up that lawnmower

- and have a go at it?

- It's AstroTurf, you moron.

At ease, at ease, at ease.

My apologies, sir.

That's just how we talk amongst ourselves.

I can appreciate good trash talk.

It's not the best I've heard,

but still pretty good.

- Why, thank you, sir.

- All I'm saying is,

any beaner would love a...

- Hey, show some respect.

- Lock it up. Mango, come on.

Eyes front, y'all.

High-value target, 11 o'clock,

20 meters. Goddamn!

Excuse me.

- I see Mrs. Mango right there.

- Doesn't miss a thing, does he?

- Come on.

- Hey.

- On the whistle.

- Let's go.

Bad news?

Um, no, sir. Are you...

That's right. And you must be

Specialist William Lynn, right?

Specialist Lynn,

I've been looking forward to meeting you.

- It's an honor to meet you, sir.

- The honor's mine.

You're part of a famous tradition now.

- Audie Murphy? You heard of him?

- Um...

Heroes of the Alamo.

I know you heard of them.

Everybody knows Texans

make the best fighters.

I never thought of it that way, sir.

And modest, too. I like that.

- You're from Stovall, correct?

- Yes, sir, I am.

I know it. Grew up near Sweetwater myself.

Started my first real estate company

in the area.

Excuse me, Mr. Oglesby. Everything's

ready for the videotaping, sir.

Okay,

now hold your balls up like this.

- Big smiles, girls!

- Everyone ready?

And action.

Bravo Squad would like to wish

you and your families

a very happy Thanksgiving.

And to our brother and sister

soldiers in the field,

Hajji don't surf!

Cut! That was not in the...

Bravo Squad would like

to wish you and your family...

Cut! People, we...

Bravo Squad would like

to wish you and your family

a very happy Thanksgiving.

Go team!

Dallas sucks horse cock!

- Boo!

- You suck!

American soldiers strong and true,

the best in the world at what they do.

Thanks for keeping us safe and strong...

Come on, Bravo.

Against all those who would do us harm.

Bravo, USA! Bravo, USA!

USA!

Now, if you want to talk about a group

that knows how to suit up and show up,

well, here they are.

The best our nation has to offer.

I have to say, I have never...

I have never been prouder to be an American

than when I saw that footage

of Bravo in action.

Now, it's my personal feeling

that the War on Terror

may be just about as pure a fight

between good and evil

as we're likely to ever see.

And would the world be a better place

with Saddam Hussein in power?

I bet a grateful Mr. and Mrs.

Mohammed Q Public in Baghdad

would have a thing or two

to tell the naysayers about that.

Now, I was visiting

with the President recently,

and he assured me we are winning this war,

make no mistake.

As long as we keep our eye on the ball,

we shall prevail.

- Sir.

- Welcome to Texas.

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