Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk Page #9

making a funny noise

or my roommate's cat

scratching up the sofa.

While you're on the other side of

the world, getting shot at by folks

who would just as soon

blow us all up to Kingdom Come.

Well, ma'am, I guess that's just

what we're trying to prevent.

Billy, to have you come

into my life, it's just like...

Five minutes, ladies.

Shoot. Second half's starting.

Listen, why don't we stay in touch?

Yeah. I mean...

Yes.

Yeah, I think, we should. Definitely yes.

Good.

Get out your phone,

I'll give you my information.

Then you can call me

and leave a message so I'll have yours.

'Cause, frankly, I do not want to lose you.

- What's your last name?

- Zorn.

I know. Everyone thinks it's funny.

It means "anger" in German.

Roger that.

You got a call from Kathryn.

That's my sister.

- Okay, there's you.

- "Zorn."

Always last on everyone's list.

I'll change you to "Anger,"

that way you'll be first.

- Sweetie.

- Faison, come on.

I gotta go.

You guys, I'm so sorry.

I totally apologize.

That was 110% my fault.

I don't know what happened. I am so sorry.

We blew it. We just blew it

because they were supposed to

bring you up immediately,

and then I was waiting for you

for, like, 20 minutes,

and I don't really know what happened.

Josh, you hear about the fight we just had?

- With the roadies?

- Wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Wait a second.

What do you mean, "fight"? Guys.

Joshy, Joshy, Joshy, it's good, man.

Relax, okay?

Hey. Jesus, Billy.

I've been trying you.

I know. I'm sorry.

You know me,

banging all those cheerleaders.

Yeah, right.

Listen, I'm on the freeway, okay?

I'm coming to get you.

Did Dr. Schatten

arrange that appointment yet?

He left a message.

- Look, Kat, you really think...

- No, I know. Trust me.

There's no way I'll let those f***ers

take my brother away.

- What are you laughing at?

- You.

I should just take you with me.

You'd kick Hajji's ass.

Listen, what you're about to do

is the right thing.

Billy, it's the right thing.

Just tell me where I can find you

after the game, and I'm there, okay?

All right.

Drive to the yellow loading area.

- It's a black stretch Hummer.

- A stretch Hummer?

- Oh, my God.

- Yeah, that's us.

But, Kat, I don't know.

It'll be hard to leave the guys.

Just hold tight, Billy, okay?

I'll be right there.

Love you.

Raise it. And praise it.

- We must let the world...

- Whoo-hoo!

That we will persevere.

- Hallelujah!

- Losers.

Come on.

Dude, what the f*** happened to your eye?

Dude, what happened to your face?

Hey, Travis, man.

Don't mess with these guys.

These guys are the Bravos.

The what-hos?

Oh, yeah, I heard of you guys.

Goddamn. You're famous, huh?

Tell me something, Bravos.

What do you think about

gays in the military?

At least they got the balls to join.

I hear ya, dude, serving your country

and all that, very cool,

but guys blowing each other in foxholes?

That sounds kind of wack to me.

Like maybe it's got something to do with

why we're getting our butts kicked in Iraq.

Sh*t, Billy, this guy seriously

needs to shut the f*** up.

- What?

- Yup.

I'll tell you what.

Why don't you join up?

Why don't you get in a foxhole with me

and see what happens?

Hey, man,

I'm just messing with you, all right?

"Don't Ask, Don't Tell,"

I'm totally down with that.

I don't give a sh*t

if you guys are gay, bi, tranny.

You're the real American heroes.

No? Whatever, man. It's cool.

I still support the troops. Go, Dallas!

- Let's go, guys.

- Yeah, Dallas!

Whoa.

- So, how does that feel, baby?

- Okay.

- Does that feel good? Yeah.

- That's funny, right?

- Okay.

- Okay. All right.

- Hey. Let go.

- This is one of the things we learn

in basic training

when we're not blowing each other.

- Hey.

- That's right.

Relax, relax.

Hey, this is what happens when you

cut off the blood flow to the brain.

- Hey. Hey. Shut up.

- How's that feel?

He's fine. He's just joking.

That feel good, boy?

Hey, I'm just having a little fun here

with "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."

- Do something.

- Arm down. Put your f***ing arm down.

- Sit down. Sit down.

- Come on. He can't breathe.

- Crack.

- He's gay?

F***ing a**hole.

Travis. Travis, hey.

- Hey, Travis. Come on.

- Hey, Travis, wake up!

Would you wake up and give me a kiss, boy?

- Wake up, Travis. Come on.

- Come back anytime, okay?

- Yo, Travis, wake up.

- Travis, babe.

Travis, wake up.

Stand up. Stand up. Come on.

- Sergeants.

- Anytime.

Hey, shut your mouth.

- Something I should know about?

- Guy was mouthing off.

Crack gave him some corrective training.

Okay, children, drink up.

Y'all gotta get sharp.

Hooah.

I hear the choppers coming

They're hovering overhead

He's pretty wasted there, Sergeant.

He'll be fine once he's back on base.

It's the rest of us

that I'm worried about.

Look.

Push it through, Dallas!

Sergeant, if you had a choice,

would you go back?

To Iraq, I mean.

I don't have a choice, do I?

So your question lacks relevance.

- But if you did have a choice.

- But I don't.

- But if you did.

- But I don't.

- I'm just saying.

- Shut!

Do you wish we had a choice,

is that what you're asking?

Well...

We don't, Sergeant.

That is correct, Specialist Lynn, we don't.

We're in the thick and deep

and all we have is each other.

That's why we need to keep our sh*t

high and tight,

and watch out...

This better be good, Albert,

because we are runnin' out of f***in' time.

Oh?

Uh-huh.

Yeah?

Are you available for a meeting?

Am I what?

- Sure. When?

- Now, with Norm.

Albert says Norm wants to make our movie.

- Holy sh*t.

- What?

Albert comes through in the clutch.

After all that bullshit,

the man keeps his word, sh*t.

I just hope Hilary Swank

- thinks about playing Billy again.

- Shut up.

Come on, Billy. We're on our way.

Could you please tell Mr. Oglesby

that they're here?

- Thank you.

- I'll tell him. I'll tell him.

Yo.

All right, guys, here's the deal.

I've been talking to Norm. He's inspired.

He's all over Bravo.

He wants to make the picture.

Might as well. His team sure sucks.

He wants to do it right.

The only thing is, he has a little

problem with the option price.

Hundred thousand for eight men.

- That's a lot of cash.

- Hear that, Billy?

What's that, Sergeant?

That's the sound of us getting f***ed.

Dave, have some faith, man.

Look, Norm ain't no...

He ain't no Santa Claus.

We all know that.

In fact, they floated around an idea

of making you two the stars

- and forgetting about the others.

- No.

Huh. That's what I said.

I said Bravo lives by the warrior code.

You guys don't leave anyone behind.

Show some goddamn respect, Albert.

I got nothing but, Dave. Nothing but.

I'm on your team, okay? Relax.

I am relaxed. Billy's relaxed, too.

- Aren't you, Billy?

- Totally relaxed, Sergeant.

- He's totally relaxed.

- Okay, hang with me.

Guys, I'm gonna get you there, okay?

So, right now what they're offering is,

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