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Blackadder's Christmas Carol Page #5
- Year:
- 1988
- 43 min
- 1,721 Views
and all-round softy Ebenezer Blackadder?
- Well Mr Blackadder lives here.
- Ah, das ist gut.
Because we have a wunderbar secret.
What secret?
If I told you we're going to give him
an enormous fortune for being so generous,
then it would no longer be a secret.
Dem, I'm so stupid! Dem!
- What would no longer be a secret?
- We are Queen Victoria.
What? All three of you?
My dear little hobgoblin, here is our Royal Seal.
We have come
to present your master with 50,000
and the title of Baron Blackadder
for being the kindest man in England.
Lumme, Your Majesty.
Baldrick, what did I tell you I'd do if you didn't
slam the door on these scrounging loafers?
But, Mr Blackadder... Ow!
I'm not at home to guests.
I flatter myself we are rather special guests, sir.
Of course, I must apologise.
One rarely receives a Christmas visit
from two such distinguished guests.
Ah, so you recognise us at last.
Yes, unless I'm mistaken, you're the winner
of the Round Britain Shortest,
Fattest, Dumpiest Woman Competition.
And to be accompanied
by the winner of this year's
Stupidest Accent Award
- I cannot believe...
- Cork it, fatso.
This is the Victorian age, where,
apart from Queen Piglet Features herself,
women and children are to be seen and not heard.
Queen Piglet Features!
Yes! Empress Oink, as lads call her.
The only person in the kingdom
is that stupid frankfurter of a husband.
The Pig and the Prig we call them.
How they ever managed to produce
their 112 children is beyond me.
The bedchambers of Buckingham Palace
must be copiously supplied with blindfolds.
Sir, we've never been so insulted in our lives!
Well all I can say is, you've been damned lucky.
Ah, Baldrick, this is excellent, excellent.
All the riff-raff and the spongers dealt with
and gargantuan quantities of tuck to be gobbled.
Here, have a wishbone. What do you wish?
I wish there was some meat on this.
Those last two were particularly satisfying.
It felt like having a go
at the real Queen and Prince Albert.
It was the real Queen and Prince Albert.
Don't be ludicrous, Baldrick.
What would the Queen be doing here?
She come to visit you to reward you
for being the nicest man in England
by giving you 50,000
and the title of Baron Blackadder.
It couldn't have been the Queen
because when she visits people,
- What? Like this one?
- Yes, just like that...
Blackadder, Blackadder
Dee dum, dee dum, dee dum
Blackadder, Blackadder
Dee rum, ti tum, ti tum
Blackadder, Blackadder
Dee rum, ti tum, ti tum
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"Blackadder's Christmas Carol" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 1 Sep. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/blackadder's_christmas_carol_4216>.
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