Brewster's Millions Page #3

- Bring your camera.

Would you mind telling me what's

going on? What did they do to you?

What do you mean, what did they do?

I think I just inherited $30 million.

Oh, is that all?

I thought we did somethin' wrong.

30 million. Why didn't you tell me?

$30 million! Are you kiddin' me?

Monty's my best friend.

Things like this don't happen often.

This is incredible news! The man

just got $30 million given to him.

This is a good day.

We're always gonna remember it.

$30 million! That makes us rich.

Well, it makes him rich.

What a great day we're having. Me!

He's having a wonderful day.

I'm having a good time, too.

I'm his best friend. Did I tell you?

Jesus.

This is real m-m-m...

..money.

We're gonna have a lotta fun

with this kind of money.

- It's real.

- It is indeed, Mr Brewster.

- Let's not be rash with our money.

- Right.

Jake, I'd like to hire you

as my official photographer.

- Salary, $10,000 a week.

- $10,000 a week? This guy's a jerk!

Shut up. I accept.

Hold still for the camera, Mr Brewster.

Not bad for a guy

who didn't finish college.

You're doin' great, but, uh... I don't

think you inherited me with your money.

Needless to say, we'll be offering you

the special 24% interest rate...

..we reserve for major corporations

and a few of our Arab friends.

I don't want any interest! I want it in a

regular account that doesn't pay anything.

It's your vault. I should pay you rent.

- Very good, Mr Brewster.

- Mr Brewster,...

..you'd be giving up $7.2 million

a year just in interest alone.

I shouldn't take advantage of people.

Am I right?

Oh, yes, sir. Right you are, Mr Brewster.

I'd like to get $3 million in cash

now and take it with me.

Do you know how much $3 million in

cash is? You don't walk around that!

- You'd need an army of security guards.

- The man's right.

- What do they pay you here?

- 350 a week before taxes.

You can't live on that.

This is a dangerous job.

I'll pay you $2,000 a week

to be the chief of my security.

- No, no, no, no.

- Oh, yeah. That's wrong.

OK, $4,000 a week. And you get 20 other

guys and I'll pay 'em $3,000 a week.

- You miss the point, Monty.

- Go get the $3 million and follow me.

- Yes, sir!

- Everybody follow me!

Monty, listen to me.

This is Spike, your pal.

You don't do things like that!

- I'll tell you what's goin' on.

- You don't even know those people!

They're gonna think I'm crazy,

but I'm not. Stick with me.

This is the way we're gonna

beat the baseball system.

You got more heart

than any catcher I know.

I can get anybody out

for three innings.

With this inheritance, this is

our ticket to the big leagues.

- Do you understand? You with me?

- Well, yeah!

Well, let's go!

That's right. Take some pictures.

- Get more cameras.

- What do you want more cameras for?

I want it to be on film.

I need a record of it.

Watch the goddamn ball, Johnson!

You're not a farmer!

Don't swing at sh*t in the dirt!

What? Collect call from who?

Switchboard says it's Brewster.

Probably from jail. Just what I need.

Tell him he owes me 200 bucks.

Yeah. I'll accept the call.

Charley, I'm not drunk. I'm in New York

and I just inherited 30 million bucks.

I'm about to go into

negotiations to buy the team.

Actually, I better rent the team...

What kind of a crap play is that?

Wilson, you idiot!

You don't steal second

when you're down two runs!

Brewster, do me a favour.

Go crazy on your own time and charges.

The team's going to sh*t, we could miss

the play-offs. I'm in no mood for jokes.

That's why I'm gonna raise

your salary - I love your dedication!

I am gonna get the team new uniforms, a

team box with air-conditioning and a Tv.

I'm gonna arrange it so

we can play the New York Yankees!

Right, right. OK, just tell me

one thing, Mr Millionaire.

You're so rich.

Why are you calling collect?

They only gave me $100 bills. I had

to rent this quarter from my accountant.

Yeah, I know. It's a big problem.

Nighty-night, sweet prince.

Nighty-night? Charley!

He doesn't believe me.

Thanks for the loan of the quarter.

Wow! Now that's really nice.

It's beautiful. But there is no way...

..l could spend over $200,000 for

something you wear around your neck.

You know how many hungry people

that could feed?

Let's go to lunch.

Yo! Taxi!

- Who the hell is that?

- Monty Brewster, the world's richest guy.

Would you like to be my personal driver

for the next 30 days at $5,000 a week?

You wanna hire a piece-of-sh*t cab

for $5,000 a week?

- Cash!

- What a country! America, I love it!

You could hire a fleet of

limousines for that money!

- You know where to hire limousines?

- Yeah.

Hire me three of the most expensive

limousines you can find, with drivers.

Bring the receipts and give 'em to

Miss Drake. We're goin' to lunch now.

Hey, everybody. Anybody wanna

go to lunch? I'm buying.

Yeah!

- Buzz off. I'm his personal photographer.

- This is a free country.

- Come on, Spike!

- Wait for me, pal!

Taxi!

- What's your name?

- Melvin.

- Melvin, give him $500.

- Yes, sir.

Look at all that money.

You have the most beautiful eyes.

I was hired to keep your accounts for

30 days. That's the extent of my services.

- To where is our destination?

- Monty! How you doin', pal?

Get in!

That's Spike. We're buddies.

We're all together.

200 people at $100 a head.

No. We're hungry. $200 a head. And

what's the most expensive wine you have?

That's the Chteau Lafite 1961.

It's $200 a bottle.

- You guys like Lafite?

- Yeah!

Excuse my expression,

but you think I'm a real a**hole.

A country bumpkin that flashes

his money around like some big shot?

- I'm not your judge.

- What college did you go to?

That has nothing to do with anything.

Give me a break. I just wanna know

what college you went to.

All right. I went to Loyola...

Loyola, Chicago. I know

the city and I know the college.

Put that back.

And the ashtray.

What's with you? Go sit somewhere else.

Get off my back. And use your fork

instead of your fingers.

- That's how it's usually done.

- Oh, is that right?

The boss found a job for you yet,

by the way? Like "designated eater"?

Look, I don't want a job. I'm his friend.

What's that pay?

Let me hire somebody to do that for you

and we could have a lot of fun tonight.

That's very flattering,

but I'm meeting my fianc.

- Who's the lucky guy?

- Warren Cox.

He's a junior partner at my firm.

- Is he a lawyer too?

- He's not just a lawyer.

He's involved with

the Sierra Club, UNICEF,...

..and he's a sincere feminist.

I bet. A guy with so many activities,

where does he find the time for you?

It's hard sometimes.

We're tryin' to do more things together.

- I'd like to meet him sometime.

- He's a very busy man.

- I'd pay him for his time.

- I don't think so.

I know you think you can buy

everything and everybody in the world,...

..but I doubt that you could

ever buy Warren.

This is Chuck Fleming,

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