Bridget Jones's Baby Page #10

BRIDGET (CONT’D)

(whispers to Miranda)

That is no place for a child of

mine.

78 INT. GALLERY. HARD NEWS STUDIO. DAY. 78

Miranda and Bridget in whispered discussion, aware that Alice

and her team are hovering in the background.

MIRANDA:

You don’t have to keep it...

BRIDGET:

Don’t I? Maybe that’s a good thing?

Is it?

MIRANDA:

Bridget, do you want a baby?

BRIDGET:

I don’t know, but I’m 43 and it

might be the only chance I’m going

to get.

MIRANDA:

One broken out-of-date condom... I

might have believed it was an

accident but two? You wanted it.

BRIDGET (V.O.)

Maybe I did?

79 INT. ANTE-NATAL CLINIC. WAITING ROOM. DAY. 2 MONTHS. 79

Bridget sits in a full waiting-room. She flicks through a

Hello magazine, stopping at a double page wedding feature.

SHOOTING SCRIPT.

48

BRIDGET(V.O.)

This is not how I thought this

moment would be. I thought I would

be with the square-jawed love of my

life, I imagined him returning home

from work in a suit to the joyous

news. Breathe. Stay calm, whole

world about to change.

80 INT. ANTE-NATAL CLINIC. DAY. 80

Bridget is sitting with DR. RAWLINGS who is holding up a

chart. Bridget consults her iPad.

BRIDGET:

So which of the times with me and

my wonderful man do you think we

might have got pregnant on?

DR. RAWLINGS

Does it matter?

BRIDGET:

Well, yes! It’s such a special

moment! We want to know which one

it is so we can treasure it.

DR. RAWLINGS

Can’t you treasure both of them?

BRIDGET:

We will and do, of course, but

surely one of those dates is more

likely than the other?

DR. RAWLINGS

Actually Day 10, his birthday, is a

bit early and Day 16, which was

BRIDGET:

- after our anniversary dinner

DR. RAWLINGS

-yes. Is a bit late. Are you sure

there wasn’t another treasurable

occasion in between?

BRIDGET:

Quite sure because - he was away

for a few days - he’s such a busy

bee! Always on business trips. So

which of the two would you go for?

DR. RAWLINGS

No idea. Both equally likely.

Could’ve been after the events

because as you know, sperm can live

for several days after ejaculation.

Bridget’s eyes bulge.

SHOOTING SCRIPT.

49

BRIDGET:

Couldn’t you just have a guess for

me?

DR. RAWLINGS

No.

BRIDGET:

Just pretend you’re putting money

on a horse?

DR. RAWLINGS

Certainly not.

BRIDGET:

What about the first scan then?

Will that show when conception took

place?

DR. RAWLINGS

No. Call this number to fix a date

for it. And do bring the father. If

you can work out which one he is...

Bridget is caught.

BRIDGET:

Right. Just out of interest...

DR. RAWLINGS

Yes?

BRIDGET:

If someone did have an element of

confusion about who the father was

DR. RAWLINGS

-you can get DNA from the baby at

the amniocentesis. And I do

recommend that you have the

amniocentesis. There are always

more risks with a geriatric mother.

BRIDGET:

Geriatric? That’s outrageous.

DR. RAWLINGS

Indeed.

BRIDGET:

Unless it means they can sign on

for their pension and child support

at the same time.

Dr. Rawlings laughs.

81 INT. BRIDGET’S BEDROOM. DAY. 81

Bridget sorts through her underwear drawer.

SHOOTING SCRIPT.

50

BRIDGET(V.O.)

Where ARE they?

She produces a pair of the almost full body spanx, they

extend from knee to just under the breast.

BRIDGET (V.O.)

Here they are! The constrictors!

Must prove to world, Bridget Jones

can do this. Independent career

woman, single mother. Must prove

myself as key millenial attractor.

Bridget now with full body spanx on.

BRIDGET (V.O.)

Hashtagletsdothis!

82 INT. HARD NEWS OFFICE. DAY. 82

Bridget is at her desk as Alice marches up. Bridget spots her

and puts on her best ‘concentrating face’, focusing on her

computer.

ALICE:

Hi, so I just wanted to connect,

check how the presentation was

shaping up.

BRIDGET:

Uh, huh, yup. Totally on top of it,

nutri bulleting the sh*t out of it.

Alice screws her face up.

ALICE:

What?... I’m relying on you

Bridget. I need you to get this

right. Understand?

BRIDGET:

One hundred percent. You can count

on me.

As Alice sashays off, Bridget lifts up her bin and vomits

into it, then puts it down as if nothing has happened.

83 EXT. ST.PANCRAS FOUNTAINS. DAY. 83

Shazzer and Tom are happily drinking al fresco as Bridget

nurses an orange juice. Bridget furtively sniffs Shazzer’s

wine as Tom shows them pictures of his Colombian baby on his

phone. In the background an outdoor experimental puppet show

is taking place. Shazzer’s children are watching the show.

TOM:

Eduardo’s still out there, he’s so

excited about being a Dad.

Bridget and Shazzer ‘ooh and aah’ at photo.

SHOOTING SCRIPT.

SHAZZER:

Speaking of which have you told

your ‘fathers’ yet?

BRIDGET:

Yes of course. Do I? What if I’m

too much of a coward? No, you’re

right.

TOM:

Or at least one of them. Get their

DNA and you can eliminate one of

them from your enquiries.

BRIDGET:

This isn’t CSI St. Pancras... Which

one do I tell? What would I even

say to Mark? ‘Hello Mark, I was

just passing by, I know I left you

asleep etc etc. But I don’t suppose

you’ve got any blood, sperm or old

fingernails lying around?’. And

Jack’s a bloody billionaire. It’s

not like I can just ring him up or

give him a friend request on

Facebook.

Shazzer is busy googling him on her phone.

TOM:

I can’t believe you slept with a

gorgeous billionaire. If you need

his DNA, I’m totally prepared to

extract it for you.

BRIDGET:

Why couldn’t I have just shagged a

bloody plumber? He’ll just think

I’m another awful gold digger,

he’ll never answer my calls. I have

no clue how I’ll ever even see him

again.

Bridget takes another desperate sniff of the wine.

BRIDGET (CONT’D)

Can you order a scotch, I need a

sniff of something stronger.

The puppet show ends, the children come running over.

BRIDGET (CONT’D)

Did you enjoy the show, kids?

SPIKE:

Yes Auntie Bridge

(aside to Ruby)

She thinks we don’t know what

puppet shows really mean.

SHOOTING SCRIPT. 52

84 INT. HARD NEWS GALLERY. NIGHT. 84

The gallery is buzzing as it’s show time. A skittish Bridget

is at the desk, in Miranda’s ear.

BRIDGET:

OK, nice job Miranda, you have 3

minutes of VT before the interview.

Alice enters.

ALICE:

I have to say Bridget, I’m actually

excited about this next guest.

Relevant, relatable and extremely

fuckable. Good work.

85 INT. HARD NEWS. STUDIO FLOOR. NIGHT. 85

REVEAL:
Down on the studio floor Jack is getting mic’ed up.

He can’t see Bridget who is up in the gallery.

The Make Up person, Cathy, approaches. Brush, powder etc at

the ready.

CATHY:

I’m thinking some simple magenta

eyeshadow to really make you pop

and a hint of rouge...

Jack smiles. The surrounding crew laugh as Cathy subtly looks

up to Bridget in the gallery who gives her a nod.

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