Bridget Jones's Baby Page #9

At that moment Mark’s mobile lights up. We see a text flash

up from Camilla (complete with photograph): ‘Call me. X’.

Bridget reflects. She gives him a tender kiss on the cheek

before gathering her clothes and leaving.

INT. COUNTRY HOUSE HOTEL. DARCY’S BEDROOM. DAY. 70

Morning light flutters across DARCY’S lids.

MARK:

Bridget?

This is met with ominous silence. He looks around and

deflates as he spies a note on the bedside table.

BRIDGET (V.O.)

I’m so sorry, Mark. Had to leave.

This probably sounds pathetic but I

got scared. We’ve been here once

before.... and I’m not sure either

of us are ready to go through it

again. We always loved the fantasy

of us. But the reality, as we both

know, is quite different. BRIDGET.

CLOSE on MARK’S face.

OMITTED 71

SHOOTING SCRIPT.

43

72 EXT. ALBERT BRIDGE. MORNING. TIME PASSING SEQUENCE. 72

On four different days over the eight following weeks,

Bridget wobbles to work on the new, unused-before bicycle.

She can’t filter into the traffic. She dings her bell.

BRIDGET (V.O.) CONT.

Must keep trying something new and

frightening each day, like finally

plucking up courage to ride bicycle

through scary urban streets which

we now call village. And will - as

always - throw myself into my work.

Bridget happily cycling along the busy road. Smiling at her

achievement. Pull out to reveal a LONG LINE of honking cars

and trucks stuck behind her.

EIGHT WEEKS LATER.

73 INT. HARD NEWS STUDIOS. BOARDROOM. DAY. 73

Alice Peabody is addressing the assembled staff of Hard News.

Richard Finch sidles in looking every inch the hipster with

full beard and moustache. He smiles smugly at Alice’s hipster

assistants.

ALICE:

It’s called ‘news’ because it

should feel new, otherwise it would

be called ‘olds’. Last night our

top three stories were twenty-three

dead in the Middle East, boring,

Earthquake in Asia, seen it before,

car crash on the M5, blah blah

blah. We are making ‘olds’. We need

to flip the switch, mix it up. I

want to nutri bullet the sh*t out

of the news.

Richard leans across to Bridget and Miranda.

RICHARD:

She’s on the warpath. Susan the

Floor Manager has gone. She was 37

for God’s sake.

BRIDGET:

She was 6 months pregnant!

Alice Peabody confers with an assistant about the powerpoint

presentation.

ALICE:

We need to grab the attention, get

eyes on screen, we need stories

like, is your sofa bed giving you

cancer? Is your freezer giving you

Alzheimer’s?

SHOOTING SCRIPT.

44

BRIDGET:

And are they?

Alice is annoyed at this challenge.

ALICE:

Literally no evidence, but you’re

missing the point. You’re intrigued

aren’t you? I want to launch Hard

News’s rebranding with a clear new,

objective. We have a presentation

in twelve weeks at the London Media

Show and I need someone dynamic,

innovative and focused to lead the

charge. Any volunteers?

In a fit of enthusiasm Bridget thrusts up her hand, she is

the only person to do so. Everybody looks stunned, including

Alice, who chooses not to acknowledge her.

ALICE (CONT’D)

Anybody at all?...

Still, only Bridget’s hand remains aloft. Miranda leans over

to her and whispers.

MIRANDA:

You do realise this is extra work

for no money.

ALICE:

Do you need the loo Bridget?

BRIDGET:

No, I want to volunteer.

(then unconvincingly)

Hashtag letsdothis!

74 INT. BRIDGET’S FLAT. EVENING. 74

The TV is on in the bedroom. Mark Darcy is on the news. He is

outside the Supreme Court in his Barrister’s garb, standing

with four female punks. Bridget stops what she’s doing and

looks at the screen somewhat sadly.

TV NEWS (V.O.)

The all female punk band, Poonani,

who have already served a prison

sentence in their native country

for criticizing their President,

are now being accused of fraud and

face extradition from the UK.

Mark addresses the assembled press.

MARK:

This case isn’t about fraud. It’s

about freedom of speech. We shall

use the full force of the British

judicial system to ensure that P...

(MORE)

SHOOTING SCRIPT.

45

MARK (CONT'D)

(he can’t bring himself to

say the name)

these artists are entitled to

exercise that freedom in the twenty

first century...

Bridget is putting on her jeans. She can’t fasten them.

BRIDGET (V.O.)

Hashtag letsjustwaitasecond and

launch into presentation as soon as

I corral increasingly worrying

middle-aged spread.

CUT TO:

Bridget is skype-ing Shazzer on her laptop in her sitting

room as she googles p.e.r.i.m.e.n.o.p.a.u.s.e. A frenzy of

websites:
Hotflush.com, Bioidenticals.co.uk etc.

SHAZZER:

So you’re what?

BRIDGET:

Peri Menopausal. The symptoms are

‘Memory lapses, mood swings, weight

gain.

For some women this can begin as

early as thirty five.’ We’re a

biologically oppressed race!

SHAZZER (O.S.)

Before you become too oppressed,

let’s rule out some other options.

You’re not pregnant, are you?

BRIDGET:

Of course not! I always carry

condoms in my handbag and I made

them use mine!

She pulls out the condom-box from her bag and examines it.

It’s crumpled and decrepit.

SHAZZER:

Oh god, you didn’t use those weird

Vegan thingies?

BRIDGET:

Bio-degradable and dolphin-

friendly. If I’m going to be slutty

it’s nice to think at least it’s

helping the environment.

SHAZZER:

Christ Bridget, I remember when you

bought those things, that was

decades ago.

She looks at them closely - the sell by date says USE BY

September 2010.

SHOOTING SCRIPT.

46

BRIDGET:

Sell by dates don’t mean anything,

do they?

75 OMITTED 75

76 INT. HARD NEWS STUDIOS. MIRANDA’S OFFICE. NEXT MORNING. 76

CLOSE UP on a draw full of pregnancy tests.

Miranda hands one to Bridget.

MIRANDA:

They were a gift. Don’t ask...

77 INT. HARD NEWS STUDIOS. LADIES TOILET. DAY. 77

Miranda stands outside a toilet cubicle talking to Bridget

inside.

MIRANDA:

Tumbling rapids, frothing

waterfalls, a babbling brook...

She turns on the taps as we cut to a pensive Bridget sitting

on the loo.

BRIDGET (V.O.)

So here I was, weeing on another

stick, thinking back over all the

times I feared it was positive, or

negative, wondering what I wanted

this time.

CUT TO:

Bridget and Miranda look at the pregnancy test stick.

CLOSE UP. A blue line appears.

MIRANDA:

I think that’s a positive result.

For a moment, both of them are in stunned silence.

Miranda shakes the stick.

BRIDGET:

Don’t shake it, you’ll hurt the

baby.

MIRANDA:

The baby’s not in the sodding

stick, Bridget. Well the good news

is you’re not having the menopause.

BRIDGET:

Right.

Bridget looks at Miranda - she can’t believe it.

SHOOTING SCRIPT.

47

MIRANDA:

This is when you are meant to leap

for joy.

BRIDGET:

I am?

MIRANDA:

You’re pregnant. You’re pregnant!

You’re going to have a BABY!!

BRIDGET:

Yes.

(with a genuine smile)

A baby.

Alice Peabody marches in, and in a panic Miranda sweeps the

test from the sink tops into a rubbish bin to hide them.

Alice heads into a cubicle and a panicked Bridget fishes the

test out of the bin.

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