Chicago
[ Introduction to ''Overture/
And AII That Jazz'' pIays ]
[ EIectricity crackIes ]
[ Indistinct conversations ]
Anybody seen
the KeIIy Sisters?
You . You're up in five.
-Keep the change, CharIie.
-Thanks.
VeIma, where you been?
And where's Veronica?
She's not herseIf tonight.
But they paid to see
a sister act!
Don't sweat it.
I can do it aIone.
Sh*t!
Come on , VeIma.
Move it, move it! Hurry up!
You're kiIIing me, here!
Ladies and gentIemen . . .
the Onyx CIub
is proud to present
Chicago's hottest dancing duo.
Two jazz babes moving as one.
The KeIIy Sisters.
[ AppIause ]
Come on, babe,
why don't we paint the town
And all that jazz?
l'm gonna rouge my knees
and roll my stockings down
And all that jazz
Start the car,
l know a whoopee spot
Where the gin is cold,
but the piano's hot
lt's just a noisy hall
where there's a nightly brawl
And all
That
Jazz
Skiddoo
And all that jazz
Hotcha
Whoopee
And all that jazz
Slick your hair
and wear your buckle shoes
And all that jazz
l hear that Father Dip
is gonna blow the blues
And all that jazz
Hold on, hon,
we're gonna bunny hug
l bought some aspirin
down at United Drug
ln case you shake apart
and want a brand-new start
To do
That
Jazz
Let's go, babe.
But I didn't even meet
your friend . That manager guy.
Don't worry, Roxie.
It's aII taken care of.
You toId him about me?
Yeah , kid , it's aII arranged .
Find a flask,
we're playing fast and loose
And all that jazz
Right up here
And all that jazz
Come on, babe,
we're gonna brush the sky
l betcha Lucky Lindy
never flew so high
'Cause in the stratosphere,
how could he lend an ear
To all
That
Jazz?
Oh, you're gonna see
your sheba shimmy-shake
And all that jazz
Oh, she's gonna shimmy
till her garters break
And all that jazz
Show her
where to park her girdle
Oh, her mother's blood
will curdle
lf she'd hear
her baby's queer
For all
That
Jazz
HeIIo, Miss Borusewicz.
Mrs. Hart.
This is Fred .
He's my brother.
All
That
Jazz
Come on, babe,
why don't we paint the town
And all that jazz?
And all that jazz
l'm gonna rouge my knees
and roll my stockings down
And all that jazz
And all that jazz
Start the car,
l know a whoopee spot
Where the gin is cold,
but the piano's hot
lt's just a noisy hall
where there's a nightly brawl
And all
That
Jazz
RO XIE :
Say it again , Fred .Oh , you're a star, kid .
My IittIe shootin' star.
No, l'm no one's wife
But, oh, l love my life
And all
That
Jazz
That jazz
Oh , say it again , Fred .
Where's the fire, huh?
Amos ain't home tiII midnight.
Hey, I don't want you to feeI
Iike I'm nagging at you ,
but don't you think it's time
I met your friend
down at the Onyx?
It's been a month
since you toId him about me.
And I know
'cause that was the night
VeIma KeIIy pIugged
her husband and her sister.
You know they say that she found
'em in the kip together?
Gosh , if I ever found Amos
sIipping it to somebody eIse. . .
going-away party.
It's getting Iate.
I have been thinking a Iot
about my act.
Whenever I get a good idea
I write it in my diary.
It occurred to me the other day
that aII the reaIIy, reaIIy
knockout acts have
something a IittIe different
going on .
Like a signature bit.
And I thought that my thing
couId be aIoof, you know?
Give 'em just enough
to get 'em good and hungry,
but aIways Ieave 'em
wantin' more.
Hey, once I get a name
for myseIf,
maybe we couId open up a cIub
of our own .
You couId run it,
and I couId be the headIiner.
What's the idea?
Wake up, kiddo. You ain't
never gonna have an act.
Says who?
Face it. You're a two-bit taIent
with skinny Iegs.
I'm just a furniture saIesman .
Yeah , but you got connections.
-That guy at the cIub.
-There is no guy.
That night. . .
It was the first time
I set foot in that joint.
I was coIIecting on a bet
from the trombone pIayer.
So you never
toId anyone about me?
Sugar, you were hot stuff.
I wouId have said anything
to get a piece of that.
And now? Now?
We had some Iaughs.
Let's just Ieave it at that.
You can't do this to me.
WouId you get off?
You touch me again ,
I'II put your Iights out!
-Wait.
-Your husband wiII be home soon .
Wash yourseIf before hitting
those sheets again .
You're a Iiar, Fred .
Yeah , yeah , so what?
You Iied to me.
That's Iife, sweetheart.
That's Iife.
You son of a b*tch !
You son of a b*tch !
You're a son of a b*tch !
Hotcha
Whoopee
Why you bothering , SaI?
This one's aII wrapped up.
It's a new city record .
From kiIIin' to confession
in an hour fIat.
SGT. FOGARTY:
Where did you getthe murder weapon?
AMOS :
I keep a gunin the underwear drawer.
Just in case of troubIe.
That's just fine.
Sign right there, Mr. Hart.
FreeIy and gIadIy.
Don't say we beat it out of you
when you get on the stand .
No, I gave myseIf up.
Surrendered of my own free wiII .
Isn't he the cheerfuI murderer?
RO XIE :
Shootin' a burgIar ain't murder.
Just Iast week,
a jury thanked a man .
I'm gratefuI for citizens
who know the Iaw.
Get in there.
You too.
Sit down .
Okay. From the top.
A man's got a right to protect
his home and Ioved ones, right?
Of course he has.
I come home from the garage,
and I see him cIimbing
through the window
with my wife, Roxie,
Iaying there,
sIeeping Iike an angeI .
That true, Mrs. Hart?
It's the God's honest truth .
My wife had nothing
to do with it.
She wouIdn't hurt a worm ,
not even a worm .
It wasn't tiII I fired
the first shot
she even opened her eyes.
I aIways said she couId sIeep
through
the St. Paddy's Day Parade.
When I think of
what wouId have happened
if I went out for a beer
instead of coming home.
It makes you sick
even thinking about it.
BANDLEADER:
For her firstnumber, Miss Roxie Hart
wouId Iike to sing a song
of Iove and devotion
dedicated
to her dear husband , Amos.
Sometimes l'm right
Sometimes l'm wrong
But he doesn't care
He'll string along
He loves me so
That funny honey of mine
Sometimes l'm down
Sometimes l'm up
But he follows round
Like some droopy-eyed pup
He loves me so
That funny honey of mine
After I shot him ,
he kept coming at me,
so I had to puII
the trigger again .
He ain't no sheik
That's no great physique
And Lord knows
he ain't got the smarts
But look at that soul
l tell you, that whole
ls a whole lot greater
than the sum of his parts
And if you knew him like me
l know you'd agree
What if the world
slandered my name?
Why, he'd be right there
taking the blame
He loves me so
And it all suits me fine
That funny, sunny honey
Hubby of mine
Supposing , just supposing ,
he had vioIated her.
-You know what I mean?
-I know what you mean .
Think how terribIe
that wouId have been .
It's a good thing I got home
from work on time.
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