Conan O'Brien Can't Stop Page #8

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Ooh, that's gonna be nice.

Can we pray for you?

- Can you what?

- Pray for you?

Oh, pray for me?

Sure, you can.

Yeah.

Dear God, I thank you, Father,

for this moment, oh, God,

for allowing us to meet Conan O'Brien,

Lord, on our journey, Father,

but I'm asking, oh, God,

that you open doors for this man, oh, God,

that his finances

are in your hands, oh, God.

Keep him safe and his family, God.

Bless him unconditionally,

in Jesus' name. Amen.

Wow.

That's really beautiful.

- Thank you for doing that.

- Take care.

There's a reason why you're here

and we're here.

I can't wait to get

on the road again

Dear God, please let me

have a show again

So, we'll stay over

after the second Boston show,

leave in the afternoon

as late as possible,

probably 3:
00

to go to Uncasville,

where we're on

after the basketball game.

Then we'll overnight

after that to Nashville.

It's an 11-hour drive.

Can we talk about Bonnaroo

for two minutes?

Oh, nice.

The dressing-room situation

is very primitive.

One of the van buses

will be backstage.

That's fine.

You look at me.

- I'm a road dog now.

- I know.

Don't you worry about me.

I'll piss in a bucket,

I'll sh*t in your hat.

It doesn't matter to me.

I know you don't enjoy

"Rock this Town,"

but I have more fun doing that

than anything else,

and I'm entitled to have some fun.

Yeah, but at whose expense?

Bye-bye, Beantown.

There are showers in here,

but they look very suspicious.

I'm not sure I love

these Wang showers.

I'm suspicious, but I think

I have to take a shower.

What's the worst

that could happen?

- Thank you.

- Thanks, Conan.

No pictures, guys.

No pictures, guys.

No pictures, guys.

No pictures, guys.

No pictures.

They don't let us keep

these buses here.

Bye, Conan!

See you guys in a while.

Hi, Mr. O'Brien.

My name's Andy.

Just don't speak to me.

All right, I won't.

Don't worry.

The entire ride home, don't worry.

I won't say a word to you.

you lived here

for 20 years of your life,

and you have an emotional

connection with this town?

Yeah.

I really like this town.

But I didn't...

I'm not from here, so I never felt

like this was my home.

But now I don't even feel

like Boston's my home.

Los Angeles doesn't really feel

like my home.

I don't know where my home is.

- Hey, Chelsea.

- Hi. How are you?

Would you like to do

any photos or anything?

It it okay to do

one of these things?

I can...

- But you won't?

- Okay.

What the f***?

You do that, you do this.

It's all about moving these hips.

I love Flight of the Conchords.

- Oh, thank you.

- So nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you, too.

Um, let me see

if he's still talking to her.

- Oh, hi.

- Hi. How are you?

- Good. I'm Kristen.

- Hi.

- Nice to meet you.

- It's nice to meet you, too.

I just wanted

to give you a present.

Look at that.

That's great.

Thanks, dude.

All right, bye.

You think David Hockney's queer?

No. I said it's hot in here.

I haven't talked to Sweeney yet

about the plan with Colbert.

Is it a surprise?

Is he just gonna walk onstage?

I don't... This is the least re...

I mean, there's no rehearsal.

- I hereby grant to you...

- No!

- Right. You do one of those.

- That's great.

So, they know to stop the music

when you get hurt?

Do they know to stop...

No. I'm gonna tell them.

Conan O'Brien.

You challenge me...

Then I give you another.

So, you dance first. Right.

Then I... then maybe we go together.

And then, Jon... you walk out

and you stop it.

You stop the music.

Okay, you should get ready.

Andy comes out and shoots Jon.

- Andy shoots Jon.

- Wait, what?

That's a bit lazy.

Does anyone here think

that seems a bit lazy?

That was

a big milestone to get past...

I mean, to do, you know?

Radio City, New York.

- Thanks for holding the elevator.

- Yeah, thanks for doing that.

Oh, no problem.

No problem, Mr. O'Brien.

Conan. Call me Conan.

- Yes, sir.

- See? "Sir."

He called me "sir."

No one calls me "sir."

I don't call you "sir."

Talk to me for a second.

- Hey-

- Hey-

It seemed good.

You gave this audience so much.

They have no faces left.

- Oh, my.

- What is it?

No, they just have barricades up

'cause there's quite

a few people out there.

Here we go.

I'm not going to bed.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

You are not going out.

Yeah, I'm not.

I can't go to bed.

I'm not gonna go home...

Jeff, you don't get it.

I can't go from this

to doing what?

Sitting and reading a Kindle?

That's not gonna f***ing happen.

Hey. Hey, buddy!

- Hi. How are you?

- How are you?

Hi. Thanks for coming.

You guys are awesome.

Guys, I can sign things.

It's kind of hard to take photos

with everybody, you know.

- Come on.

- Oh, you mean just for you, you mean?

You're the nicest guy.

Come on.

That guy said

that was the only one.

Oh, so I guess

that guy was lying.

I guess that guy was a dick.

Guys, we're done

with the pictures, 'cause...

"Come on!"

Is that your catchphrase?

You can keep saying,

"Come on, come on,"

but it's really

not coming across too well.

Can we get a picture?

It's much easier to sign stuff.

Hey, everybody, I got to go.

Thank you so much!

See you.

Can you shut that f***ing door?

- Thank you.

- Take care. See you, man.

Thanks.

From here on in, I want to make sure

that the days off are really days off.

I Bagpipes playing 1

Why do I feel

like a fireman died?

We are 2 minutes away to start.

Oh, there's a TV

over there in the corner.

Does someone want to monitor

what the show's...

How far are we

into the schedule?

Please tell me. How much further

do we have to go?

- Top of page 2.

- And where am I?

It doesn't really matter how many.

- Stop saying that.

- It's 10-minute...

It's how many 10-minute

performances before you.

We're dead. It's over.

I want everyone on the bus.

We're getting out of here.

This is crazy.

It's gonna be 11:30.

What's happening now?

What's happening?

68 minutes from now,

you will take the stage.

- 68 minutes from now?

- 68 minutes from now,

if they stick

to the schedule closely.

I need a cab.

I'm going to the Four Seasons Hotel.

I would give that a 20% upside.

I'm goin' to Baltimore

Far from this opera

forever more

Oh, not a mime. No.

40 minutes behind schedule.

I thought it was

a bad idea to have...

What if I run right now...

Just said, "This has to... Stop it."

Just stop it.

Just stop it.

Come on

Well, my baby and me

We went out last Saturday night

I had my hair piled high

My baby, she looked so right

Well, pick you up at 10:00,

have you home by 2:00

Mama don't know

what's in store for you

That's all right

We're looking

as good as can be

Well, we're gonna rock this town

Rock it inside out

Yeah, we gonna rock this town

Gonna make you swing and shout

Yeah

Rock, rock, rock, rock

Rock till we pop,

we're gonna roll till we drop

I'm gonna rock this town

And rip this place apart

Hold my hand.

Takeoff's always the hardest part.

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