Don't Give Up the Ship Page #4

Tiddley boo, tiddley bang, clippety

clop chap clang. Poughkeepsie.

Not in code! Let me read that.

Now, hear this men. We're

to proceed to Pearl Harbor

where all officers and men

with enough points will

be flown to the mainland

for immediate discharge.

Very useful.

Now, what did you do that for?

Uh...

We finally put in at Pearl Harbor

and lined up for final inspection.

As we stood there, everyone

had only one thought in mind.

H-O-M-E.

Girls.

Now hear this.

Men, I'm proud to have served

with every one of you.

I'd like to shake every man's hand.

But, that would only be

wasting precious time.

All reservists with enough points for

discharge, take off! And that's an order.

Well, I go where my men go.

Congratulations, Bill,

as the new commanding

officer of the U.S.S.

Kornblatt is all yours.

Joe, congratulations on your new job.

Who is going to sail the

Kornblatt to the mainland?

The Commander handed over the

ship to the Lieutenant Commander.

The Lieutenant Commander passed

her along to the Lieutenant.

The Lieutenant turned her

over to the Lieutenant J.G..

The Lieutenant J.G. passed

her on to Enson Roberts.

And Roberts gave her to Steckler.

And Steckler got stuck...

Alright you men!

Now, hear this!

I'm the new skipper of this ship!

Set the special sea and anchor detail!

Stand by and get under way!

Leave your quarters!

Say, say haven't we met someplace before?

Guadalcanal? Iwo Jima?

The Army and Navy game?

Wychinski, sir. Stan Wychinski.

I'm your chief

boat's mate. We just met

in the dock an hour ago.

Oh!

That's right.

Uh, oh yeah, I'm sorry.

I never forget a face. I should've known.

Say, uh Chief, um...

how long you been in the Navy?

Over 20 years, sir. Ten years with the Flat

Tops, five years with the Battle Wagons

the rest of the time on D.E.'s.

Good, cause I'd like to ask you a question.

What's that, sir?

Um.

How do you back this thing out of here?

How do you back this...

It's alright, kid!

I mean, sir.

If you'll excuse me, sir, I have to go aft

to load the popsicles on for the snack bar.

What's this?

Well, you want to calibrate

the Sexton, don't you?

I have a better idea, Chief.

Uh, you calibrate the Sexton

and I'll load the popsicles.

Let's see if we know our

business here, it's a dry run.

All hands stand by to get under way!

You men aft forward taking the gangway!

You men aft, lifeboat practice

in the starboard lifeboats!

Wait a minute! Let's change that!

Men aft down in the lifeboats

men forward stand by, men

aft take in the gangway!

Ready to get under way!

That goes for you too

in the engine room.

Sea and anchor detail, stock to it!

Forward aft stations, men

aft forward stations!

No, no! Forward, forward aft! I

mean aft, aft, forward, forward!

You're still confused! Look! One of us

has to run this ship. I'm the leader!

I'm the leader?

Now hear this!

Now hear this!

I want a tight ship!

I want an efficient ship!

'Cause an efficient ship is a happy ship!

And a happy ship is a tight ship!

And I want everyone to be

efficient, happy, and tight!

There will be no drinking!

That's all!

Next stop San Diego!

All stations report in?

Engines manned and ready?

All stations report in.

All engines manned and ready, sir.

Stand by to answer all bells.

Stand by to answer all bells.

Engines ready to answer all bells, sir.

Right standard rudder.

Port engine add one-third.

Starboard engine back one-third.

Right standard rudder, sir.

Admiral Hawlsey couldn't

have done it any better.

All the stern one-third!

Oh, I missed the part about

taking in the lines.

We were finally on our way.

Ten feet out from Pearl Harbor and

only 2,327 miles to the mainland.

My worries were almost over.

So, there I was in command

of the Kornblatt.

I was doing everything by the book.

And the book was doing fine.

Then, on the third day out, I had to

take a sight to check our course.

Wychinski was waiting in the wheel house.

Now hear this!

Now hear this!

Stand by to change course!

35 degrees left rudder!

Waiting further orders, sir.

Yeah, yeah, yeah! Coming up!

Aw, there we are!

Yeah!

44 and a half degrees left rudder!

No, make that 44 and a third!

62 and two-fifths right rudder!

Are you sure of your readings, sir?

Diagonal obtuse of single

axle forward mark!

That doesn't sound right to me.

Maybe he knows a short cut.

We were sailing a straight and

true course for San Diego.

Well, almost a straight course. I

will admit we skidded a few times.

Well, things were pretty

mixed up for a while.

Lucky there wasn't much traffic.

Five days out we spotted land ahead.

An island uncharted on any map.

We had just made an important discovery.

We were lost.

I realized I had made a boo boo so I

named our discovery "Boo Boo Island"!

All engines ahead one-third.

What happened? I didn't say stop! I

said all engines ahead one-third!

That might be a little tough, sir.

You see we're on a reef.

On a reef?

Maybe we ought to radio for help, sir.

Radio for help?

And have a blot on our record?

No sir! Not on your life!

We'll sit right here and wait

for that tide to come back in!

That's it! Wait for the tide.

Could it have gone very far?

The tide? Do you think?

- Life jacket, sir.

- Life jacket?

But the tide didn't come back.

So I decided to investigate the island.

Maybe there were people on it and

they could tell us where we were.

It's awfully quiet here, ain't it?

Don't be scared, Skipper, the war's over.

C'mon, Brown you take the right

flank, I'll take the left flank.

I'll wait in the boat for you, fellas.

Okay?

Fellas?

Fellas?

Fellas?

Shhh!

Make some noise, birdies, it's too quiet.

After all, what have we got to...

Help! Help!

Wychinski!

Help! Help!

Help! Help!

Wychinski!

Help!

Help! Help!

Help! Help!

What are you yelling about? I'm

the one that's in trouble!

Help! Help! Wychinski!

- That way, Chief.

- Well, go ahead, go ahead.

Help!

Help!

Thanks, fellas!

I never thought you'd get here.

Oh, thanks, Wychinski. Thanks, Brown.

Wychinski?

Brown?

Alright. Okay.

Here, here you are. Here it is.

No, you're making a mistake.

You don't understand!

Wait a minute! Will you wait and let...

Well, let me explain! You don't understand!

The war is over!

Here! Nobody's mad at nobody.

We're friends. You friend, me friend. How.

Wait a minute. What are you charging?

What does that mean?

Colonel wish to speak to you.

Well, what' he want to speak to me. They

don't understand that the war is over.

American sailor boy.

Welcome to Island of Yonukshma.

Well, thank you. It's a very...

You are prisoner of Colonel Ginzo Tagashi.

Well, thank you Colonel, but I

don't like to sound contradictory

but if anybody's prisoner of anybody, you're

my prisoner. You see the war is over.

Who win?

Who win? Well, I hope

you don't get mad, but

we win.

Who win, American sailor boy?

You win.

But, haven't you heard?

- The war is over.

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