Dude, Where's My Car? Page #5

Wow, wow, wow.

I don't see the car. Are you|sure this is the place?

The car'd better be in there.

I almost lost my pinky to get that info.

Oh man, I sense there's something|very canadian about this place.

Plan B!

Right.

Are you ready?

Let's do this.

One.

Two.

Three.

I'm ok. You ok?

Shibby.

Dude. It's a lama.

It's not a lama. It's an ostrich.

OK. Very slowly...

...let's turn around...

...and go back the other way.

OK.

New plan. We turn around again...

...very slowly...

...and go back the other way.

OK.

They're everywhere.

What now?

Hey, I saw this thing about|ostriches on Animal Planet.

Those are lama's dude.

No. What you're supposed|to do is stand very still...

...and eventually they'll|get bored and go away.

I think it's working.

Stupid lamas.

Let's go!

Let's get in this car!

Chester.

What ostriches eat?

Why?

If they eat peanuts...

...we'll just throw them |peanuts and they'll go away.

We don't have any peanuts.

Great, we're screwed.

They're leaving. It worked.

What worked?

Whatever we did.

Now may I have the continuum transfunctioner?

Not quite yet.

Scary dream, huh?

What's up? My name is Mark.

Where are we?

You're in punishment room.

This is where he likes to|keep the ostrich poachers.

Poachers?

Yeah. That's right.

You know, I've been in this cage for about three years|five months and seventeen days...

...but who's counting...

How's my breath?

That bad, huh?

Where are you guys from?|I'm from Connecticut, hi, Mark.

There we go.

Chester!

Get him off.

Pierre.

Hi.

No, that's not what it looks |like. Maybe a little bit.

How is your now?

Shut up!

Well, somebody sure is a grumpy gasp today.

In France when a man is caught poaching ostriches.

...we shave his head and we|make him to run through the fields.

Oh God, that's the good part.

Once you have seen this...

...you are never quite the same.

OK.

Tell me about it. I used to model.

Lucky for you I am an honorable man.

What? I'm sorry.

I said I am an honorable man.

I'm sorry, an honograbbbble?

honorable.|- honogargable?

honorable.|- honogarable?

I don't know what you're saying.

Honorable! Honorable!|- ^%$@^@

I think you're trying to say honorable.

Shut up!

Hey, I'm sorry.

Right, hear this. I am going to ask you a question.

If you get it right I will set you free.

If you get it wrong...

...well, you will be spending a lot of time with the...

...ever popular Mark.

I can be very nice.

Alright, here it is:

What is the average running speed...

...of a full grown male african ostrich?

Pass. Pass to me. I know it.

Pass to Mark.

You can not pass!

Shut up. What do I have to do to shut you up?|Do I have to hose you down again?

Don't hose me. Maybe later.

Dude, we're dead.

Not so fast.

The full grown male african ostrich or the latin "struthio camelus"|can go to an average size of sixty six inches...

...and weight anywhere from 225 to|350 pounds that can get up to....

...well an average speed of...

...27 miles per hour.

This is absolutely correct.

Animal Planet!

Well. I said brown.

Here, let me get you out of this stinky cage.

Oh, please forgive me.

Can I get you guys some beers?

I'd like a Near-Beer please.

Shut up!

Well, actually we just came|about the car that you bought today.

We just wanted to get some stuff out of it.

No problem. Right this way.

Well, it was nice meeting you guys.

Good luck with the whole modeling thing.

Email me. OK?

freek-in-cage.com

The... The car was here this afternoon.

It just disappeared.

How do you just lose a car?

I'm so sorry you guys. I...

I feel terrible.

Alright. Pierre. Just focus here.

Was there anything in the car when you got it?

No, nothing. Except of course for this.

Dude!

Dude, I'm having my next birthday party here for sure.

Yeah, me too.

Cool.

Hey, excuse me. Can you tell me where locker 206 is?

Yeah, it's right over there.

Oh, hey, it's you guys.

Dude, you guys paid an amazing|round of pot-pot last night.

We did?

Oh, yeah!

Thanks dude.

Shibby.

Here it is.

I sure hope my money's in there.

Yep.

Who are you?

This is my boyfriend Patty.

Nice to meet you.

How did he pop a name like this?

Less questions. More giving me my money!

Guess this is it.

Yup. The moment of truth.

It's been a long strange trip dude.

Sure has Jesse.

Hey!

I've got a plane to catch.

OK.

My suitcase.

Oh my god! You guys are the best!

Thank you so much.

Thanks for your help fellow. Good work.

Are we... Are we supposed to be grousout here?

I don't know.

Bye...

Look at this stuff. Captain Stue tickets.

Awesome.

Ohh! Jellybeans

No jellybeans...

Cool straw. I'm gonna keep this.

Hey, look at these.

Dude, we speak Japanese.

Sweet!

I don't see a continuum transfunctioner in here.

Wait a second. What do we|know about the continuum transfunctioner?

That it's a very mysterious and powerful device...|- and?

and it's mystery is only exceeded by it's power.

Right!|But has anyone ever said|anything about what it looks like?

No.

That was Jesse and Chester. They've|got the continuum transfunctioner.

Quick, to my mother's minivan.

That was Jesse and Chester. They've|got the continuum transfunctioner.

Quick, to my stepdad's pickup truck.

I'm really getting a hang on this thing dude.

Yes!

Yes, I finally beat you.

You... You're a competitor.

Oh, boy, you got me the first nine, but not number ten.

Not gonna happen.

Time for the final showdown.

Chester, Jesse.

Don't worry girls. We're here to save the day.

Quit it. These things are expensive.

Enough. You have the continuum|transfunctioner or not?

Now, release our girlfriends.

First give up the transfunctioner.

First release the girlfriends.

First you give us the continuum |transfunctioner. Then...

Same time...

Yes!

We have got the continuum transfunctioner.

There they are.

OK stoners. Where's the continuum|transfunctioner?

Hey. You...

Release dodo bird

Tommy you're such a jerk.

Yeah.

That's our continuum transfunctioner.

Well now it's mine.

Nerd.

- Dude, let's get out of here|- Yeah.

Where is the continuum transfunctioner?

We don't have it.|But...

...we'd like you to meet our|girlfriends Wanda and Wilma.

Yeah, we've already met.

You'd better stay away from our boyfriends.

You fake breasted sluts.

OK. Let's go this way.

Halt. Where is the continuum transfunctioner?

Well, you wanna go talk to that guy over there.

Let the pleasure begin.

That is not the continuum transfunctioner.

Of course it is.

Follow the kids.|Come on. Follow. Go. Go.

Nerd bashing time.

It's not our fault. It was them.

Looking for a Smoky McPot. I|have a delivery for a Smoky McPot.

You ordered pizza?

Yeah. I figured we'd get hungry.

Oh, no! It's you two!

Look dude, I almost got it.

Dude, you're really starting to piss me|with your Rubiks Cube obsession. OK?

Sweet!

Wow!

No wonder those things are so impossible.

Oh no, you've activated the|continuum transfunctioner.

Alright, what's going on?

Once all five of the Darusi|Crystals stop flashing the...

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