Eddie's Million Dollar Cook-Off Page #12

there will be nothing but

knocking around and sweating.

Do you know there's a saying,

spooning leads to swooning,

and that leads to something

you don't want.

There's a little boy,

a very small boy,

and his mother's

making soecker kaka.

He's putting in the sugar

and he tries to eat the sugar

and the mother says, "it's

better to wait, better to wait."

Put in the flour,

"it's better to wait."

The soecker kaka is ready

and when we wait,

it practically melts

in his mouth.

And that's what I want it

to be like for us.

When we do make love,

I literally want to

melt in her mouth.

Well, then you know what,

I hear what you're saying

and I take the lesson

of the soecker kaka

- and I want you to melt in my mouth

as much as you do. -Absolutely.

So I'll just put the bed

up against the window

and leave a big path in case

there's a fire or something.

Well, I am concerned about fire.

This is about me trying to

protect myself from you.

In Africa, the men used to

build cages around themselves

from what I've read, to separate

themselves from the women.

This is like an African cage

I'm going to build around myself

and you might wake up

and find me strapped to it,

to keep myself from you,

because once I make love to you,

and I'm telling you this now, this

is a promise for our wedding night,

it will be so vigorous and

so fast and harsh and loving,

that you are not going to want

to do it again for a long time.

- Let's save that kind of double fever.

- Listen to you.

He's full of beans. I just want to be in

an American hotel room with my fianc,

but you want to be an African

cage, okay that's fine.

I think if everyone

had a donut we'd calm down.

Everything is sexual

to me right now.

- That hole in that donut is sexual.

- Well, stop it.

I'm just saying if I wind up

in bed beside you,

there is going to be

a lot of noise

and action

and sweating going on.

You're doing something

they call tempting the fates.

That's a dangerous step.

I'll tell you what.

- Uh... -You know, maybe

get a... you know,

- we could get a running start.

- Pauline,

if you would like to

watch us make love right now,

- you may as well watch.

- Oh no, thank you.

You may as well watch, because

this is what's going to happen.

- Oh, god.

Can you imagine?

You know what I have for you.

You know what's built up

over four years.

The second the finger

is pulled out of that dyke,

there's going to be

a lot of liquid flowing.

Let's not do that

in front of your sister.

- Well, I just...

- Please don't do that

- in front of your sister.

- Okay but you know,

I have to say, I just,

I think that I can hold back

the dyke personally.

I'm not angry. I'm not angry,

I'm just saying,

and I am not angry,

if I am on this bed

and she is on this bed,

I am going to

make love to her so fast

and hard and furious

that you don't want to be here.

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