Elsa & Fred Page #7

- Is your father coming?

- At this point, I doubt it.

- That's good.

- Why?

- Because I told Fred I was a widow.

- Mom! Why?

I don't know. It just slipped out. Yeah.

All right. Everybody smile real big!

- Ready? Here we go.

- Yeah.

- Big smiles.

- Yes. Very good.

No, no. Wait!

Grandpa has arrived.

Gramps! Grandpa!

Son of a b*tch. He showed.

- Is that your wife's father?

- No, it's my father.

Yay! Grandpa! Come on, Grandpa!

Come get in the photo!

All right, everybody.

Real big now! Ready?

Squeeze together a little bit more.

Big smiles now.

- You like doing this to me, don't you?

- I didn't do anything to you, Fred.

If I did anything to anybody,

it was to my ex-husband.

- I killed him and with good reason.

- Oh, yeah? And what was that?

- 'cause he let me down.

- I hope I never let you down.

Oh, Fred. He was so unfaithful.

When I found out having an affair...

I confronted him and

he denied it obviously.

So I needed to follow him and

catch him in the act, so to speak.

Did you draw him out?

No, I went to London

with some girlfriends.

And we went to a male strip club.

After the show, one of the boys

came back. Oh, he was beautiful.

He was very tall and dark and handsome.

He had blue eyes. His name was Steve.

And he looked into my face,

and I said, "How much?"

And he came to my room

and he was so affectionate.

And he was... he was hot.

When I got back, I told Max everything.

And he got so angry,

and I said, "Why are you angry?

You can do this sort

of thing and I can't?"

And he said, "Yes, because I'm a man."

Well, I did it. I buried him right there.

So now you know why I killed him.

Everything you say to me...

seems like such a lie.

The stripper, Picasso,

- the portrait.

- Oh, I can get the portrait by Picasso.

- It's in my safe.

- Come on, let's see it.

No. If we're going to trust each other,

you have to trust me without proof.

Elsa... I wish I could trust you.

And I don't believe you.

Period!

Fred.

- Fred!

- You're a liar, Elsa!

- Fred, where are you going?

- A shameless liar.

Oh, Lydia.

If your car gets smacked, it wasn't me.

- Dad, where are you going?

- For a walk! In the f***ing park!

Dad.

Hold on, Dad. Okay, what is going on?

I mean, Mom is barely cold in the grave,

and you're seeing that woman?

- Would you mind your own business?

- This is my business.

She is not good for you.

Look at you. You're all red.

- So I'm red. So what?

- Well, at your age...

Oh, at my age, I can't be red?

What would you prefer? Green? Blue?

Just stop sticking your

nose into my business!

And give me back the copy of your keys.

- But... what if there's an emergency?

- Give them back to me!

I'll call the super.

Good-bye, Lydia!

Why did you come?

Because, on Thursday... we have to

sign the contract for the warehouse.

I have to order all of the

"can't lose" glasses,

and I wanted to know if you'd decided.

Well, I have.

- And?

- I'll do it.

Really?

Stop by before signing. We'll go

to the bank and write the check.

Okay. Thank you.

- Thanks.

- Good-bye, Lydia.

Oh, God!

Lydia, what do you want now?

- Good evening.

- Oh, good evening.

Well, you would show up

completely unexpected,

tonight of all nights! What do you want?

- We need to talk.

- About what?

- Can I come in?

- Yes.

- May I sit down?

- Yeah, of course. Of course.

Now, look, I don't know

if you are her husband,

- her ex-husband, her dead husband...

- She told you I was dead?

I'm sorry, I don't know your name.

- Frederick Barcroft.

- Max. Maxwell Hayes.

Look, Fred, Elsa, my wife...

- she's very dangerous.

- You're still married?

Well, technically. It means nothing.

It was long ago.

But she confuses reality

with her imagination.

She lies, and then she believes

her own lies, as if they were true.

- I loved her with all my heart.

- Yeah, but you cheated on her.

- After she cheated on me.

- No, that's not true!

Oh, she's got you believing that. Well,

that's what's so dangerous about her.

See, she transforms her

fantasies into something real.

When she cheated on me,

I caught her red-handed.

You mean that you went all the way

to London to catch her in the act?

She's never been to London!

It was here, in New Orleans.

I need a drink.

- You want anything?

- No, nothing for me.

I don't drink, hardly.

Well, she said I was a drunk.

That's one thing she threw in my face.

You know, one thing's for sure.

She'll drive you to insanity.

She lives in this dream world.

- Did she talk to you about the actress?

- Who? Who?

- The blonde with the big... you know...

- Oh. Anita Ekberg.

Yeah, her. Did she tell you about her...

her dream of going to Rome?

To the fountain?

Yeah, yeah. But she told me that

you didn't want to take her there.

But she wanted to get into the fountain,

for crying out loud! And dress up like...

What's-her-name? And I had to dress

up like that other guy in the movie.

It was madness. And for what?

What? To get arrested?

I just came here today to warn you.

One second, Max.

Is it true?

That when she was young, she...

she looked like Anita Ekberg?

No, that's a lie.

She was even more beautiful.

She was fantastic.

She was the most beautiful

blonde in all of New Orleans.

Don't make the same mistake I made.

Letting Elsa go...

is the biggest mistake of my life.

Elsa!

Elsa, what is it? I need to talk to you!

No, Fred. Let's talk tonight, all right?

You're my life, you know that?

Yes. Follow that cab, will you?

All right. Take me home.

Elsa?

Elsa?

- Elsa?

- I'm in the bathroom.

I've cooked you dinner.

I'm coming.

You've hardly eaten anything.

- I'm just not hungry.

- Would you like me to get you some tea?

I just want you to hold me.

This scene is practically pornographic.

What a woman.

John, can I ask, what is the prognosis

for someone who's on dialysis?

- It depends.

- On what?

The general state of the person,

lifestyle, age.

What are we talking about here, Fred?

Oh, Elsa's on dialysis.

I was wondering what...

what is the best possible outlook?

I'd have to know her history, but...

But what? Tell me.

Let's say it's not very promising

for a person of her age.

She'll die?

We all die eventually.

I'm an idiot.

Yes, you are an idiot, my friend.

What time is it?

It's a quarter to 5:00. Why?

Come with me.

- Good evening.

- Well... thank you, Fred.

Is this what you've been

doing all afternoon?

What plans do you have

for the next week?

Excuse me?

- Open it.

- What is this?

Read it, please.

Tickets!

- Rome. Your city, I believe?

- Oh, Fred!

- Oh, I'm going to die of excitement.

- Oh, I hope not.

You know, in the portrait that

Pablo did of me, he did my arm.

Yes. But then, my hand was

coming out of my shoulder.

You're adorable, even though I

believe a third of what you say.

You don't believe that Pablo

Picasso did a portrait of me?

I cannot be with such a mistrusting man.

Okay, okay. I believe you.

I believe you.

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