Embracing the Chaos: A Conversation with the Cast of 'The Salton Sea' Page #2

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I was living next to Miss Congeniality

and didn't even know it.

Hey.

You left some Chinese-looking

sh*t out here.

Thank you.

Sorry I was rude.

I'm just new around here.

Yeah. It's a dangerous neighborhood.

I live across the hall.

My name is Danny Parker.

Colette Vaughn. Thank you.

Danny. Okay.

My name is Tom Van Allen.

I'm a trumpet player.

My name is Tom Van Allen.

I play the trumpet.

My name is Tom Van Allen.

I'm a trumpet player.

That hurts my heart.

What a beautiful composition.

And the performance?

Tom Van Allen is nothing

short of dazzling...

...in his interpretation of Miles

Davis' haunting, moody piece.

- Thank you.

- And he has a hot ass...

...with hardly any hair on it.

- Again, I thank you.

- No, I was talking about Miles.

Don't!

What do you think of when you play?

I just think about what life would

be like without you.

Let's spend the night here.

- There are no motels here.

- No, no!

Right here on the beach.

Come on, let's do it.

I got us lost.

We should get going.

Okay, we'll stay.

We'll stay.

Trust the system.

I gave you this Bobby thing.

I've done a lot of busts for you.

Put your cigarette out.

We're in church.

Put your cigarette out.

It's disrespectful, smoking

in front of the Virgin Mary.

Whatever.

So I work hard. I hate what I do

but I'm good at it, you know?

- I'm industrious.

- Yes, you are.

So why does Garcetti hate me?

Come on, man. You can't

take Garcetti seriously.

He hates everyone.

He doesn't even like dolphins.

You know that?

I'm not kidding you. He does.

Seriously, the man hates dolphins.

Have you ever heard of anyone

who doesn't like a dolphin?

Garcetti is a dolphin-hater.

- Hey, bro.

- What's up?

How are you doing?

You tell him yet?

No, I was getting to it.

What?

Danny, it pains me to have to tell you

this, but remember Domingo?

The wetback you helped us put away

for trafficking months back?

It turns out that he's connected

to the Mexicali boys.

Now his homeys are making

a lot of noise...

...about hanging a Colombian

necktie on the rat.

You know what that is?

They cut a hole in your throat.

Pull your tongue out through it.

- F*** you!

- Interesting, isn't it?

You have to take a hike.

Disappear. Protect yourself.

You're not gonna protect me?

I do bust after bust for you guys.

For a solid year.

You're nothing without me.

Over and over,

and you'd cut me loose?

Your felony is dropped

to a misdemeanor.

Your snitch card is full.

I'll clear it with the D.A.

And you, my friend, are getting lost

before Domingo finds you.

Now go. Get lost.

I only deal in high-end weapons.

All stolen, traceable

only to original owners.

Glock, semiautomatic, 9 mm.

Tenifer matte finish, polymer grip,

...and a 10-round magazine.

I could hook you up with this gun

for $350, well below market value.

Maybe you're looking for something

with a chrome finish.

A Llama Mini Max .38

Super Auto, semiautomatic.

Satin chrome, rubber grip,

...3.5-inch barrel,

skeletonized handle, slide release.

Eight-capacity magazine.

I won't lie. This gun is not the bomb.

It will do the job.

That's why you can walk out

with this gun for $150.

Looking for power? This gun's got

mad power, kick and reputation.

It's the Smith .357

Magnum revolver.

Rubber combat-style grips, fixed rear,

ramp front sights, two-inch barrel.

Weighs a feather 21 oz.,

For impact, the Magnum

will satisfy all your needs.

These are my guns. All sales

are final. All prices are negotiable.

F***! Where do you

find these people?

The Del Amo Fashion Mall.

Mostly.

Mostly.

What are you gonna do tonight?

What am I gonna do? What are we

gonna do? What do you wanna do?

Why do you need a gun anyway?

It's a dangerous world.

Open the door!

- I'm not dressed!

- Yo, Mina!

- Use your key!

- You mad-dogging me, b*tch?

No. I was just admiring your boots.

Did you purchase them locally?

Come on! I ain't got all f***ing day!

Okay, nice talking to you.

- Yeah, f*** you. Let's go!

- Just a minute!

Come on!

How many f***ing times I got to knock

on this door, you f***ing b*tch?

- Did you go through my sh*t?

- I didn't.

How did you know it was there?

F***ing b*tch! What were you doing?

What the f*** were you doing?

Where's my sh*t?

I put it there? What were you doing?

- Get off me!

- What the f*** are you doing?

- Come here!

- Get the f*** out of here.

- What the f***?

- Get off me!

Bubba.

Ride them, cowboy.

It's a classy truck.

You like that?

You consider my proposition?

Get in, hoss. We'll talk it over.

Jimmy, listen to me.

I am in dire need of some cash.

You see that?

That is what I am talking about.

What?

You're smooth. You use

words like "dire" and sh*t.

You got language skills, son.

- Jimmy.

- "I'm in dire need of some cash."

Listen.

I want to do a big score

with Pooh-Bear.

And you know one of his dealers.

That guy you were talking to,

Big Bill.

- You can get ahold of him.

- Yeah.

Hook me up with him. Tell him

I wanna make a deal with Pooh-Bear.

Listen to me.

Really listen to me, your friend.

This guy is -- Okay.

You are a circle of something that

is totally pure and full of light...

...and that is totally smooth

and totally wonderful.

And he can't even understand himself.

No one can understand it.

It's just something

that has overtaken him.

It's not him.

It's something that is on him.

There's no him in there. And he

has this whole thing with his nose....

But he's got the gak.

Yeah.

- So you in?

- Yeah!

Finn's in!

What's the plan?

I got a connection who wants

to buy a quarter's worth.

No. Okay. A quarter is not even

anything he's in. That's nothing.

A quarter of a million.

F***!

F***!

What's in it for us?

A 10% finder's fee.

What is that?

That's like --

Twenty-five grand.

You get five just for the ride.

Come on, man!

Roll with the Cougar! Cougar!

Finn.

Might as well put a sign on the car

begging the cops to pull you over.

You mean, to throw them off?

Yeah, that's what I mean.

- Where the hell does this guy live?

- Palmdale.

Why do they call him Pooh-Bear?

On account of his nose.

- You have to explain that one.

- He doesn't have one.

I'm sure it's me.

I'm not making the connection.

The way Winnie the Pooh always

got his nose caught in the honey jar?

Pooh-Bear did so much gak

they had to cut his nose off.

Now he just has a plastic one. They

say he hasn't slept in over a year.

- Bullshit.

- I've never seen him sleep. Seriously.

Have you ever seen

Queen Elizabeth sleep?

No. What, is she a tweeker?

Yes, that's my point.

Get ready, gentlemen!

- Zapruder?

- Ready.

And rolling.

Oswald!

Ready!

- Grassy Knoll?

- Ready.

- And the undeniable Third Shooter?

- Good to go.

Okay, gentlemen, here we go.

Jesus, look, here comes

the president now!

That's the president of the United

States, ladies and gentlemen.

Here he comes, waving to the crowd.

Look at the first lady.

She's looking radiant as ever. Lovely.

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