Everyone's Hero

Play ball!

I got it! I got it!

Here we go!

Strike!

Oh, come on.

Why do I always get stuck with the loser?

He stinks.

Darn it!

Too bad.

Hustle! Hustle!

Yankee Irving again!

Tough luck.

Why do we always end up

with Yankee?

Excuse me.

I got it!

Whoa!

You show them, Warbuckles!

Way to run it out!

- Go, go, go, go!

- Run, Philly, you can do it!

Come on, Freckles!

Keep the ride going, buddy!

Next batter!

- Me?

Oh, man!

Tough luck!

Irving, here's your big shot.

This is just like Game Seven

of the '26 Series. Babe came to the...

Yeah, yeah.

Listen, you're not Babe Ruth, okay?

Now look, you've got no strike zone,

so he's guaranteed to walk you.

Batter up!

- Just don't swing.

- He's gonna whiff. Bring it in.

- Easy out, easy out.

- Let him walk you.

- Don't swing at it, Irving!

Yeah, don't swing!

If I don't swing,

how are you gonna know I can hit?

Don't swing, Irving!

Hey, batter, batter, batter,

hey, batter, batter, swing!

Strike one!

- What did I just tell you?

Come on.

- You've got no strike zone!

Strike two!

- Just take the pitch!

Don't swing!

Don't swing, Irving!

Don't swing at it, Irving!

Now batting, number one,

Yankee Irving!

Ah!

Nice job, whiff.

That's it.

You're never playing on my team again.

Give it up.

Go home.

Yeah, don't come back.

Come on, let's get out of here.

Loser.

Honey! Dinnertime!

Huh?

Hmm.

Hmm.

Guess nobody wants you

in the game either.

Hey, Irving, you stink!

The Movietone News:

Bringing you the news

just days after it's happened.

In sporting news, the Yankees continue

their splendiferous winning streak.

It's Game Three of the World Series.

Bottom of the ninth,

the Yankees down by three,

bases loaded,

Babe Ruth steps up to the plate.

Will the Sultan of Swat save the day?

You betcha!

So what's Napoleon Cross,

owner of the Chicago Cubs,

going to do now?

With his best bat, Darlin', in his hands,

Babe Ruth is unstoppable.

Babe Ruth. Babe Ruth.

Babe Ruth and his best bat, Darlin'.

He's everywhere!

Every newsreel, every newspaper

talks about Babe Ruth.

Look at all this stuff! Babe Ruth sippy cup,

Babe Ruth silver dollars,

Babe Ruth underpants,

obviously for the larger child.

What's he got that I haven't got?

He's got a World Series trophy!

And I want one!

- Is that too much to ask?

- No, not at all.

Why don't you put me back in, Mr. Cross?

I'll help you win that trophy.

I'm working on a new pitch. I call it...

Are you ready?

The booger ball.

No, Lefty,

even with your most outrageous cheating

you're no match for Babe Ruth.

Cheating? Me? Babe Ruth's the cheater.

I bet he's got some lucky

voodoo charm or something.

That's cheating.

You're right, Lefty.

Babe Ruth does have a lucky charm.

What is it, what is it, what is it?

It's his bat.

So what do we do?

I'll tell you what we do.

We take away his bat. Let's do the math.

- Going into the light.

- Babe without bat is nothing.

Without that bat, he's just big and fat!

Put that on a T-shirt.

Yeah, I like it.

It's good stuff, it's good stuff.

Only one problem.

How we gonna get Babe Ruth's lucky bat?

- Not "we," you.

- But, Mr. Cross, I...

Get me that bat. And I think

the only way to get it is to steal it.

Otherwise, you're out!

Hi, honey, how was your day?

- Hey, Mom.

- Is Dad home yet?

- Not yet.

- He's working late.

- Again?

- Dinner will be ready soon.

- Not hungry.

Why do I always get stuck

with the loser?

Yankee Irving again!

He's working late.

That's it.

You're never playing on my team again.

You're not Babe Ruth, okay?

Why do we always get stuck

with Yankee?

You think you could take your thumb

out of my eye?

Whoa!

Huh?

What?

- Are you talking?

- I am.

One smart fella, he felt smart.

Two smart fellas, they felt smart.

Three smart fellas, they all felt smart.

I'm talking.

Wait a second. Where are you going?

Back to the sandlot,

where I was peacefully decomposing.

Hey, watch it there, grabby hands!

Don't make me go all

crazy eight ball on you.

Whoa!

Where did you go?

Hey, Fuzzy, how do I get out of here?

- This kid is nuts.

- I just wanna talk.

And I just wanna leave.

Hey, genius, it just so happens

you left a gaping hole in the infield.

Sayonara.

Your living room is a little cramped.

And dark.

Huh?

I'm rollin' in style!

Whoa!

Nobody gets their mitts on Screwie.

I'm going back to the sandlot.

Ouch!

Why can't I break a window?

Every other ball can break a window.

Gotcha.

- What's going on in here?

- Mom, look, a talking baseball.

He never gets tired of that one.

Oh, my gosh, a talking baseball.

Well, I think I hear the meatloaf talking.

- It's saying, "Yankee, time for dinner. "

- Talking meatloaf?

Food can't talk. Except for beans.

They can make themselves heard.

- Go get cleaned up.

- She can't hear you?

I don't know. Let's see. Help!

I've been kidnapped by a deranged child!

Yup, you're right. She can't hear.

Please don't skimp on the soap.

You smell like a week-old hot dog.

Oh!

Kid, quit it.

That's my protective coating of dirt.

I wish Dad was here.

Oh, sweetheart, you know

he's got to work the extra shifts.

I know, but I really need to see him.

Tell you what,

why don't you take him his dinner?

- Really?

- Just this once.

You know you're not supposed

to be there while he's working.

Thanks, Mom.

Great. So just drop me in the sandlot

on the way to see your daddy, and...

Hey, hey, what are you doing?

Making sure

you don't go anywhere.

- Not the underpants drawer!

- Don't worry. They're clean.

Not anymore.

Wow!

Now batting for the New York Yankees,

number one, Yankee Irving!

Hey, Dad.

What are you doing here?

I wanted to see you. I brought you dinner.

Great. What are we having?

Mom's mystery meatloaf.

Hmm.

Meatloaf. Let's start with dessert.

So, what's new?

Dad, you're not gonna believe this.

Oh, no? Try me.

I found a talking baseball.

Oh, really? Does he have a name?

I call him Screwie.

Oh, yeah? Where'd you find it?

At the sandlot.

Did you play ball today?

Yeah, but I don't think

I wanna play anymore.

Hey, I thought you loved baseball.

Well, I think I'm in a slump.

Hmm.

You know, I was watching the team

practice the other day, and it struck me,

here are guys who make a living

playing baseball.

They play every day, and even on the day

after they lose a game,

they're still standing at the plate

swinging that bat.

And you know

how they got to be so good?

They just keep swinging?

Come on, I got something to show you.

Babe Ruth!

Is that Darlin'?

Yup. Sure is.

Babe had that bat custom made

three years ago.

That was the first year

he hit 50 home runs.

That's right. People say she was made

from a thousand-year-old tree

growing on the side of Mount Olympus.

I'm pretty sure it was made in Kentucky.

Hey, come on, pal, we should head home.

Oh, come on, Dad,

just another minute, please?

I tell you what, you can stay here

for a few more minutes

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes