Ferris Bueller's Day Off Page #5

The other phone line rings.

FERRIS:

Squeeze you buns for a second. I

got another call.

He puts Cameron on hold. He clears his throat and answers

the second line. He sounds like he's on his last breath.

FERRIS:

H--hell-o?

64 EXT. OFFICE BUILDING. DOWNTOWN 64

A LaSalle Street office tower.

TOM'S VOICE

Ferris?

65 INT. TOM'S OFFICE 65

He's behind his desk. Nice office. Two windows. Herman

Miller desk and chair.

TOM:

You sound miserable.

FERRIS' VOICE

Really? Darn! I thought I was improving.

TOM:

Were you sleeping?

FERRIS' VOICE

I was trying to do some homework.

66 CU. COMPUTER MONITOR 66

A closer view of the rude drawing Ferris is making.

FERRIS (OC)

I'm so worried about falling behind.

INT. FERRIS' ROOM

He leans back from the monitor and sips a Coke.

FERRIS:

Dad? Can you hold on a second?

TOM'S VOICE

Sure, pal. Are you alright?

FERRIS:

Just a little phlegm on the phone.

Hold on.

He puts his father on hold.

FERRIS:

Cameron? It's my Dad.

CAMERON'S VOICE

Oh, that's just great. Are you busted?

FERRIS:

It's completely cool. He's just

checking up on me. Now, listen to

me. I'm working on getting some

heavy bucks out of him. So, the least you

can do is hurry up and get over here.

Bye.

He disconnects and gets his father back. He switches back to

his sick voice.

FERRIS:

Sorry, Dad. The moment before you

called, I had a chest spasm and I

blew lung fluid all over the place.

It was making me ill looking at it.

But gee, it's sure great of you to call.

I'm sure there're alot of fathers

who wouldn't take time out from

their busy schedules to call a dumb,

sick teenager.

TOM'S VOICE

Hey, pal, what was I supposed to do?

Ferris reaches out and hits a key on his computer. The

screen dumps the drawing.

FERRIS:

Give yourself some credit, Dad. It

was a mammoth gesture. It's like those

savings bonds you used to give me

every Christmas.

(looks at CAMERA and smiles)

It was that kind of concern.

CU. COMPUTER SCREEN

A message is flashing: "TRANSMITTING DATA".

INT. FERRIS' ROOM

He turns away from the computer and puts his feet up on the

desk. He lights a cigarette.

FERRIS:

You had to work hard for the money

to buy those things, right?

TOM'S VOICE

Not any harder than anybody else.

Ferris mouths Tom's words as he says them.

67 EXT. CHICAGO LOOP. DIAMONDVISION SCREEN 67

Ferris' drawing suddenly appears on the billboard.

Pedestrians stop to look.

68 INT. FERRIS' ROOM 68

He blows a smoke ring.

FERRIS:

You work so hard I'll bet you don't

even remember where those bonds are,

right?

Ferris points a finger in the air as a cue to his father.

TOM'S VOICE

Wrong.

He nods.

FERRIS:

Oh, yeah? You're pulling my leg. You're

just trying to cheer me up.

TOM'S VOICE

Like hell I am. They're in a shoebox

in my closet.

Ferris smiles. He looks at CAMERA. He's gotten exactly what

he wants.

FERRIS:

(to CAMERA, normal

voice)

Was that a class move or what?

The guy gave it up faster than

a drunk Catholic girl. I hope my

kids don't pull this sh*t on me.

(thinks)

Of course, if they didn't, they'd

be dumb and abnormal and they'd

probably never move out of my

house and I'd have to support them

until I die. I take it back.

(to the phone,

sick voice)

Dad? All this talking has made me

kind of light-headed. I think

I better lie down.

TOM'S VOICE

Okay, pal. You take care. I'll

call you after lunch.

FERRIS:

You don't have to, Dad.

TOM'S VOICE

I want to. Bye now.

He hangs up. Ferris sighs.

FERRIS:

You win some, you lose some.

He turns his desk chair around and gets up.

FERRIS:

I'm so disappointed in Cameron.

Twenty bucks says he's sitting

in his car debating about whether

or not he should go out.

69 INT. CAR. CAMERON 69

He's sitting behind the wheel of his car.

CAMERON:

We're gonna get caught. No doubt

about it.

He cuts the engine.

CAMERON:

I'm not doing it.

He sits for half a beat.

CAMERON:

He'll keep calling until I come

over.

He sighs and restarts the engine. Another beat.

CAMERON:

Actually, what'll happen is I'll

get caught. Ferris'll escape.

Another beat. He stops the engine. A CRASH OF HORROR MUSIC.

70 CU. DRESSER DRAWER 70

Hands curl around the drawer pulls. The drawer is opened

slowly, ominously. The hands lift a sweater out. A HERALDIC

STING as we see a men's magazine beneath the sweater.

INT. FERRIS' ROOM

He takes out the magazine. He leafs through the pages for

the pictorials as he speaks.

FERRIS:

Cameron'll go on like that for a

good thirty minutes. The guy

is a shellfish when it comes to

making a decision. The reason

he doesn't fell good is, he

worries about everything. He's

the only guy I know who's deeply

concerned that when he grows up

there'll be a critical shortage

of strategic metals.

He exits the room.

71 INT. HALLWAY 71

Ferris comes out of his room and heads down the hallway.

FERRIS:

Cameron's also the only guy

I know who knows what strategic

metals are.

(waves the magazine)

Pardon moi.

He goes into the bathroom. We HEAR THE TOILET SEAT SLAM

DOWN.

FERRIS:

(sings)

MAYBE I'M JUST LIKE MY MOTHER,

SHE'S NEVER SATISFIED...

72 INT. CLASSROOM. LATER 72

A stunningly beautiful girl, SLOANE PETERSON, is sitting at

her desk in a history class. She's staring out the window as

a tweedy MALE TEACHER delivers a dry, dusty lecture.

TEACHER:

Roosevelt's health had seriously

deteriorated by the time he met

with Churchill and Stalin at Yalta.

(sneezes)

Pardon me.

The classroom door opens and the school NURSE walks in. For

a moment, the teacher thinks she's come in because she heard

him sneeze. She crosses to him and whispers in his ear.

SLOANE:

She, like the others, watches the nurse curiously.

INT. CLASSROOM. TEACHER AND NURSE

The teacher's face drops as he's delivered an obvious piece

of disturbing news. He nods grimly to the Nurse. She looks

at the kids.

NURSE:

Sloane Peterson?

SLOANE:

Sits up in her seat.

NURSE:

She's a picture of compassion and understanding.

NURSE:

May I see you outside for a moment?

There's been an emergency.

SLOANE:

A smile curls across her lips. As she gathers her books she

looks to the GIRL next to her.

SLOANE:

(whispers)

Dead grandmother.

73 INT. HALLWAY 73

The Nurse is gently holding Sloane's hand.

NURSE:

(nods solemnly)

Dead grandmother.

74 CU. ROONEY 74

He has a suspicious look on his face.

ROONEY:

Dead grandmother?

INT. DEAN'S OFFICE

Rooney's at his desk. His secretary is standing across from

him.

SECRETARY:

That's what Mr. Peterson said. I

had Florence Sparrow notify Sloane.

ROONEY:

Who's this girl's going with?

SECRETARY:

It's so hard to tell. I see her

alot with Ferris Bueller.

Rooney smiles. His suspicions are confirmed.

ROONEY:

Could you get me Mr. Peterson's

daytime number?

As the secretary starts out of the room, Rooney's phone

rings. She stops and answers the desk phone.

SECRETARY:

Edward Rooney's office.

(pause)

Yes. Can you hold? Thank you.

She puts the call on hold.

SECRETARY:

It's Mr. Peterson.

Rooney is startled. He thinks for a beat then reaches for

the phone.

Rate this script:3.3 / 3 votes