Fred Won't Move Out Page #3

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cheese, maybe some vegetables.

You know, we don't

have any left.

Sure, there is.

There was a lot left.

I'm going to make

Bob's Bagel.

No, I told you,

there's nothing.

What happened to

the Everything Bagel?

- Hi everybodyl

- Bob! '

- How are you?

- Good to see you!

Oh, you can just take

that stuff straight through

We'll be there

in a minute.

I got it.

Listen, Carol,

just because you happened

to be a psychotherapist

doesn't mean you see the dark

recesses of everybody's hearts

or their

stomachs either.

This has nothing to do with

me being a psychotherapist.

You asked if I had brought

three Everything Bagels.

I think you had a personal

interest in those.

That's exactly

my point,

if I wanted to

have all three

would I draw attention to

it like that in the car?

Yeah, I think you would.

I like Bob.

I want to give him

something special.

He has a personal

relationship with mom.

I'd like to

give him a gift.

Come on, he works for us.

He's in our employ.

He doesn't need

a gift basket

every time he comes

to our house.

I'm not giving

him a gift basket.

I'm giving him an

Everything Bagel.

He's an artist.

A wonderful,

wonderful artist!

Pretty soon he and I are

going to be working together.

He's going to be ticking out

Hava Nagila at a bar mitzvah

and I'll be committing the

whole thing to eternal video;

And anyway, the two of you

would work horribly together.

What have you

got against Bob?

I'm Bob.

There can only be one Bob.

And speaking

ontologically,

there can only be

one everything.

Not three

everythings, not two.

There can only be one

everything in the end.

Now, there are

no everythings,

so why don't you go in

there and at least help him.

I certainly would be

delighted to help that

wonderful artist.

What am I

going to do now?

You know Susan,

you are my

favorite student

and I promise you

we'll sing all of your

favorite songs today.

How are you

feeling, mom?

Ah, listen, Maestro,

is there anything that I

could do to, you know, help?

You want to help?

Yes, I want to help.

Okay.

Well, I'm setting the

chairs up around Susan here

so why don't you help me

finish with these chairs?

Sure!

- Hey Bob!

- Yeah?

Hey Bob!

I'm so sorry, it

seems that all three

Everything Bagels

have disappeared.

All three of them.

That's too bad.

I, umm... I could

give you some carrots.

Oh no, thanks, I'll pass.

Sorry dad.

Listen, do you think

maybe we could get...

We could get

Victoria in here

No, let Victoria please finish

cleaning up in the kitchen.

I want Victoria

to sing with us.

Okay, go get her.

Go get her.

Victoria!

Can you sing with us?

Here we go.

Okay, come sit

over here, sweetie.

- Good! Can you sit next to me?

- You can sit by Fred.

Go ahead, sweetie.

Thank you!

And come sit over here

between me and Fred.

Lila, would you

do me a favor?

Listen, just for

my own information,

just for my own sort of

understanding of things,

this whole thing is really kind

of for mom's benefit, right,

is it really necessary

that all of us have

to get together

and do the whole

singing bit?

Come on!

It will be fun.

We go over this

every week.

It will be fun.

You know something, if you

really want to help your mother,

everybody enjoying this

together is extremely helpful.

All right, fine.

I'm sorry. I apologize.

Go ahead.

Go ahead.

All right!

Susan, why don't we start

with our very favorite tune?

Everybody!

I'm sorry, this is

just depressing.

I'm just going

to kill myself.

I cannot take this.

It's not that bad.

I'm sorry.

I'm... I'm sorry.

Oh, come on, come on.

Look, look, I've

got a beat for you.

Here we go.

Great!

Great!

All right, let's

hear it fellows.

Who remember Silvery Moon?

- Oh.

- Oh, Silvery Moon.

Come on.

- Silvery Moon.

- What's that smell?

Silvery Moon.

With a spoon, yeah.

Here we go.

Here we go again.

- Very nice!

- Beautiful!

Very nice!

Okay.

What happened to the

painting of the horse?

Umm, Fred gave

it to a museum.

Why?

Well, it made him feel like a

very wealthy, important person.

Is he wealthy?

No.

And when she's happy it makes

it much better for all of us.

- I used to...

- Thank you! Thank you, Fred!

I used to be involved in a

way with the music business.

I made boxes

and at the time when

there were record albums,

we would manufacture and

produce the sleeves, the jackets

that the albums

would go in;

Broadway shows

and different artists

and all kinds of things.

So we really love music.

You know, there was

something so romantic about

going into a

record store

and seeing those big boxes

all lined up on the shelves.

I couldn't wait to find

my most favorite new artist

and bring that...

that record home,

take the packaging off,

smell it, read everything,

even before I

listened to the music,

it was such a

big deal to myself

and all of my

friends growing up.

Oh, I didn't know

that people smelled it.

I used to like

to smell books.

Well, you know, it's like those

mimeograph smells from school.

We all thought it...

it just meant something

to have such a great

new record and...

and every bit of the

sensation attached to it

was important to us.

We used to listen to

Glenn Miller and Bing Crosby.

Oh, Susan loved

Bing Crosby.

I had an album of...

for Dumbo,

the movie Dumbo,

and each side of each

record at that time

was a different song,

you know, it was great.

I never saw an elephant

fly, and oh my goodness,

and Pinocchio also was

really great, great music, so.

In a little way I was a

part of the music business,

as far as the

packaging of it.

- Hey Bob!

- Yeah.

Can you come on

in here for a sec;

I'd just like

to talk to you?

Okay.

I guess it's going

to rain anyway.

Are you sure?

I think it's clearing.

Come on.

Okay.

Look, I know I

haven't been entirely

what you might call

supportive of the whole

music therapy thing.

Well, the thing is I see

that it has been good for them.

I mean, it has really

made a difference.

I want to thank

you for that.

The thing that I didn't

get to tell you before was

next Tuesday my mother is going

into a facility in the city.

So like all good things

I'm afraid music therapy

is going to come to an end.

Oh, that's such a shame.

Well, you know, at least I

can still come once a week,

because there's

still Fred to work with,

Yeah, I know, I could see

that he really enjoys it.

But the thing is

the following week

Fred is also going

into the same facility.

You know, he didn't say

a word to me about this,

are you sure,

because if s.

Well, he may not yet

understand it fully,

he will definitely be going

into the same place.

I just had a 10-minute

conversation with him,

we talked about music

Bob, you've got

to trust me on this one.

It's my

company's checks

that pay for you and

that pay for Victoria

and all the

support they get.

He definitely is moving

to that same facility

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