Friends: The Stuff You've Never Seen

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It only takes two heart attacks

To finally make you see

One of them won 't do it

But the second will set you fr...

I say, I did the song wrong.

It's hard to tell, but I know.

No, I don't wanna switch. Come on.

I can throw wet paper towels here!

Well, at Monica's you can eat...

It's him. I'm sorry,

but this is allowed to happen.

Phoebe, I don't wanna switch.

Come on, please, I can throw

wet paper towels here.

Well, at Monica's...

I'm sorry. It's gonna happen.

How is it ever gonna get said?

- Need Zen help?

- Yeah.

- Zen.

- Because it's not silly.

- Here we go.

- Okay.

- Action.

- No, no, Phoebe...

Maybe I just better say the line.

Phoebe, I can do...

- I can throw wet paper towels here.

- But, no...

- Okay, it's all right. I can do it.

- Yes, you can. Ready?

Yeah.

Chandler, we said we would meet

at the coffee house at 6.

We said 7, you dumb whore-bag.

That's what you get

for making me start all over.

And action.

Monica's gotta have

the phone in the right place...

We are fixing it.

He's gone, he's wigged.

Oh, no, you didn't. I did.

Our last pizzas together as roommates.

I wish I'd known you were

going to do that. I ordered...

Our last dinner together.

Me, bringing the food of...

- Let me start that again.

- You see, the way it works is that...

...they shoot the part...

...with Dick Clark in Times Square.

That's all actually live.

But they tape the dance party stuff.

I don't know what I'm saying.

I really am...

I'm melting.

Hold it. You're not talking about...

...Dick Clark's New Year's Eve

Rocking Special?

We're celebrating it tonight.

Hey, why don't you book a day

at one of those romantic spars?

Hey, buddy, do you think I can

borrow your uniferm? Say this...

"Uniferm"?

- All right, I got it.

- Here we go.

Hey, it's Porsche.

Look, come on, I don't know

what to do... or say.

Very funny. Look, I don't know what

to do, you know? Holy Christ...

Why am I having such a hard time?

Very funny.

Look, I don't know what to do.

Jesus.

It is one of those days.

What the hell is the line?!

Action.

You guys gotta come see this one.

Mark.

You girls got a measuring tape?

Are you saying that you don't

want to get with this?

You see, I don't...

You got it.

Joey, what are you doing?

You got it.

- And action.

- You got it.

- What are you doing?

- I work here.

- Here we go. Stand by.

- Don't laugh at that.

And action.

You got it.

Joey, what are you doing?

You're like:

This is you, David:

Here we go. And quiet please.

And action.

You got it.

- I wanna hug you.

- You hug me.

Uncomfortable.

Come on, here we go.

Hey, while we're here, anything else?

Get off me.

Matt's face is better on this side.

What's that in your pocket?

- Okay.

- You better not get me sick.

- I broke.

- You broke? Okay.

I broke.

- And stand by.

- I'm doing my brother.

- That's gross.

- Action.

All I'm saying is, it's one thing...

...being prepared for an attack

against each other...

...whole other story being prepared

for, like, I don't know, "Surprise!"

- X camera, you good?

- X camera, you good?

- What? That's terrible.

- No, it's not. We do it every year.

And we've never founded them.

Never founded them.

Sorry. I'm sorry.

Come on, reset.

Action.

Action.

Oh, come on.

Oh, I don't want that. No.

You're right. I can't date her.

Yeah, and you gotta wash

the fer... The...

You're right.

That's when I make my move.

Now, what was that all about?

Does it not taste good? Let me try that.

No, no, no!

There is too much.

It tastes like feet.

It tastes like feet.

Okay, we're good.

- Here we go. Action.

- I like it.

I can see that...

I'm gonna lead him

in again, okay, Kev?

- Action.

- It tastes like feet.

Oh, it does work.

- That is a different phone.

- Oh, is it? Is it?

Somebody's actually here.

Hello? Hi.

Let me call you right back,

I'm doing a scene.

Monica!

Come down a little wider,

slower too. Here we go.

Yeah, that was a little...

Camera. Action.

Rachel?! Monica?!

- Jesus, sorry.

- Yeah, even a little wider.

Yeah! Come on!

Chandler, I just figured out

who you are.

Honey, you gotta see this.

This is like the size of my arm.

So either the dog goes or I go, okay?

Either the dog goes or the mime goes.

- Did you two...?

- You know I don't sleep with guys...

...on the first date.

David Crane, Kevin Bright,

Marta Kauffman.

- Anymore.

- Okay.

Happy birthday, grandma.

Better to be over the hill...

- Look, it comes with a phone.

- It does.

Yeah, apparently a bunch

of the invitations weren't delivered.

There was a problem... Sorry.

- I dialed the wrong number.

- Okay, good.

Phoebe, what about friends of your

grandmother? I mean, there's... Does...?

What about friends of your

grandmother's? Do none...? I can't.

I know, I know.

Friends of your grandmother's?

Do they not have the recipe...?

- Jesus.

- We got it on the third pass.

- What about friends of your grandmom?

- "Grandmom"?

"Grandmom."

And... No, she uses sex as a weapon.

Fine, thank you for warning me.

At breakfast I'll be on guard for...

- And she uses sex as a weapon.

- Fine, thank you for... What is it?

- Thank you for...?

- Action.

- And she uses sex as a weapon.

- Fine.

I got it. We'll just do

the scene one line at a time.

- You got one.

- I'll lead you in.

I got an Emmy. What...?

I knew you were gonna

throw that in my face.

That was three years ago.

She apologized and apologized.

- What more do you want?!

- We want the last six years!

This is what I'm looking at:

"What more do you want?"

And action.

No, you don't know the system.

We don't need nobody

messing with the system.

Good God, I'm so dramatic!

I can't believe you're

nominated for an Emmy.

- No, no.

- Oh, Soap Opera Digest Award!

- What?

- I don't know.

Maybe I'll try it some other way.

Oh, I can't believe it,

you're nominated for an Emmy.

- No, no.

- Oh, Soap Opera Digest Award.

- No.

- Soap Opera Digest Award.

No, no, I'm up for a Sudsy.

- I'm sorry, I didn't catch that.

- I'm sorry, it's like a geyser in here.

- Your mouth, you mean?

- Yeah.

No, we cannot let her stay...

...because if we let her stay,

she will stay here forever.

- Action.

- All right, I'll see if they can cancel it.

Or maybe they can just put eyes

on the hoochies, and we'll say that it's...

- Action.

- All right, well, I'll see if...

- We get it out eventually.

- Oh, I'll get it out.

It's just getting it out that counts. It

doesn't matter, the sequence or timing.

All right, I'll just see

if they can cancel it.

Or maybe they can just...

It's funny.

I can't wait for you to hear it.

Action.

Oh, my God, what's happening?

- Okay, it's...

- Don't do it!

- Don't do what?

- I have to. Okay?

- Don't do it.

- I have to.

You hear that?

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You can't...

You have... I don't know, what do I say?

Okay, now what is my first line?

- "What did we agree?"

- Okay.

Yes, that's right, but also, Hanukkah.

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