Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties
- Year:
- 2006
- 6,495 Views
[drumroll]
[rousing orchestral
fanfare playing]
[fanfare ends]
[birds squawking]
[wind blowing]
[grand, royal orchestral
theme playing]
NARRATOR:
Once upon a time,
in an English castle
far, far away,
there lived a pampered
personage by the name of...
-[yawning]
...Prince.
[bell ringing]
All right,
everyone, he's awake.
Hurry! Hurry!
Come along, quickly.
Right, are we all ready?
Get the Carlyle log.
NARRATOR:
Prince knew no other life
than a life of luxury.
Oh, did I mention
that Prince was a cat?
Good morning, Prince.
[yawning, groaning]
Your tea.
[British accent]:
Mm-hmm-hmm! Breakie.
I have your favorite dish.
Carlyle log.
Ah, lovely.
[slurping, smacking]
[moaning]
[chuckling]
Super.
Oh, it's good to be the king.
NARRATOR:
On the other side of the world,
there lived
who thought he was a king,
but who ruled over
Meow.
[grunting]
I'm the king of the cul-de-sac.
That's what I'm talking about.
Jon and I have everything
I could ever want.
Food in the fridge.
Cable and satellite.
And don't forget lasagna.
That's right.
It's good to be king.
I want you to know, you're the
most important thing in my life.
Let me sleep, please.
Before I met you,
my life had no meaning.
I was incomplete.
Oh, you still are, really.
I guess what I'm
trying to say is...
...will you marry me?
Eh? Marriage?
Well, this is kind of sudden.
There may be
Look, I like you,
but not as a spouse.
Maybe as a servant, we could
stay together, make it work.
So what do you say... Liz?
-Wait a second. Liz? Liz?
-Garfield.
Liz is a girl.
No, worse.
She's a girl vet.
-[bell dings]
-Turkey's ready.
Well, I think
Hmm, we gotta put an end
to this torture.
[romantic music playing]
Time for a new DJ.
[stereo blasts]
[singing]
Somebody take my temperature.
Garfield!
[stutters]
Whoa!
[music stops]
Man, you have changed.
I can't have you messing
this up for me, okay?
-Oh, I get it. It's her.
-Come here.
She doesn't like our music.
Whatever happened to Jon?
-My metal-head guy. My dude.
-[doorbell chimes]
You were so much cooler
when you wore a mullet.
Now stay here.
-So much cooler.
-[doorbell chimes]
I suppose she likes
this haircut.
I suppose she likes
this haircut.
-Coming!
-Tell me she likes it the way it is now.
-Hey, Liz.
-Jon, I have incredible news.
Guess who's going to be
speaking at this year's fund-raiser
for the Royal Animal
Conservancy.
Siegfried and Roy?
-Oh, come on.
-Just Siegfried?
at the last minute
because she's nursing
a sick chimp
and they asked me.
I mean, it's gonna be at
this really cool castle
on a huge estate.
Well, Liz, that-that's...
I am flying to London
tomorrow morning.
-Can you believe it?
-What?
I mean, I have
to pack, and...
Oh, are these rose
petals and candles?
Yeah, well, Liz,
I have some...
some important news
of-of-of my own.
Uh...
GARFIELD:
Hey, me, too.
[clears throat]
Excuse me, do you believe
in love at first sight?
I was hoping you'd say yes.
You have made me
so very, very cat-happy.
-Uh...
-Well, come on.
-What's the news?
-The news is, I, uh...
I finally house-trained Odie.
-Really?
-Yeah.
That would explain
the rose petals.
I have to pack.
I'm so sorry
about dinner.
But you know what?
I will send your
regards to the queen.
Okay, congratulations
on Odie.
Oh, oh, yeah.
And, hey, you, too.
They're lucky to have you.
[kisses]
Bye.
Oh, I thought she'd never leave.
Garfield, you ate
the whole turkey?
Well, yeah.
What are you
doing with this?
Oh, never mind.
It's too late.
She's already off to...
[belches] Ooh!
Good stuffing.
Well, come on, cheer up.
-I saved you the wishbone.
-There's nothing I can do.
Sure there is.
Return the ring and
get your money back.
Wait a minute.
I'll go to London.
-Oh, you poor sap.
-She'll love it.
-She'll be surprised.
-Please don't do this.
-She'll be thrilled.
-Tell me you're not gonna do this.
-She'll say yes.
-Please, don't.
I gotta go pack.
You moron.
This is a huge mistake, Jon.
One of your biggest.
Don't roam. Stay home.
Odie and I are not just coming
along for the ride, pal.
This is actually
an intervention.
JON:
Okay, guys. Here we are.
[yawning]:
Oh, quick flight.
We must have been
in the jet stream.
England is no great shakes, huh?
I mean, the buildings here look
like, uh, the kennel back home.
That is the kennel back home.
They'll never take me alive.
They're gonna
be fine, Jon.
Yeah, yeah.
Garfield's never stayed
in a kennel before,
so I'm afraid
he might have
some separation anxiety.
No.
He's probably fast asleep
in his cage by now.
You hear me, warden?!
I have the right
to remain silent!
Anything I say can and
will be held against me
in a court of law!
And I have the right
to an attorney, too, pal!
And if I can't afford one,
one must be provided for me
by the court!
Never mind!
I just broke out.
twice a day.
And, oh, if you
could give him
a pan of lasagna
between each meal,
that would be great.
Can't be
without Pooky.
[barks]
Oh, great. Just when
things were looking up.
Look, why don't
you stay here
and get your
fleas removed,
maybe get a brain transplant?
[barks]
Okay, go away. Beat it.
Hide beneath the wheels.
Agh! You're
ripping my fur!
Aah! Get off! Get off!
Get off! Get off!
Get in here!
Get in! Get in!
Okay, so you have
my cell phone
and you have
the hotel number.
-Don't worry, I do. Bye now.
-Okay.
GARFIELD:
Airport, and step on it.
Jon won't mind if I repack him.
We're gonna need
some room in this bag.
[humming]
[quacking]
[quacking]
[humming, screams]
Aah! You savage beast,
how dare you!
Get out of here!
Smithee!
There's something
in the pool! Smithee!
There's a duck in my pool,
Smithee.
A duck!
A duck, sir?
Filthy wild animal
soaking itself in my pool.
What do you intend
doing about this?
I shall speak
to the duck, sir?
Mmm.
[squeaking]
Oh, by the way,
the solicitors are here
for the reading
of Lady Eleanor's will.
Excellent.
In a few moments,
I'll be the master
of this entire estate.
And from this day on,
things will be done my way.
[quacking]
MAN:
This is the last will and testament
of Lady Eleanor Carlyle
of Carlyle Castle.
"I declare this to be my last
will and testament,
which I make,
this first day of September"...
Keep still.
They're reading Lady Eleanor's will.
I've got a bad feeling
about this.
I can't watch.
If Lord Dargis gets the estate,
we're done for.
We're doomed!
Shh! Quiet.
"To my devoted Smithee,
"I make thee caretaker
of my estate.
"Care for my beloved
animal friends
"as you have in the past
and you will always have
a home at Carlyle Castle."
Thank you, Madame.
She's dead, Smithee.
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"Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 22 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/garfield:_a_tail_of_two_kitties_8798>.
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