Goin' South Page #2

you across the threshold.

Wipe your feet, please.

Always do.

Well... it looks like the opera house.

Please take your clothes off, Mr Moon.

Don't sit there.

Here, put these on.

These is work clothes.

That's right.

But I just got married.

Don't count on that too much.

This is a gold mine? In Texas?

It's gonna be.

Looks like mice bit into it.

First you'll begin crevassing,

then cross-cut using the

singular jacking method.

I ain't familiar with

that particular method.

You pry away any loose rocks.

Are you watching?

Then you insert the drill.

Like this.

Then you use the sledgehammer.

Simple.

Where's the gloves?

My hands blister easy.

Better blisters than neck burns.

Mr Moon...

Pretend we're friends

and call me Henry.

The railroad is breathing down my

neck, so let's not waste any more time.

I'll do all I can do, but...

...that's all I can do.

I'll be outside running

auriferous tests.

Why don't you run one on

your skull while you're at it?

Supper's ready.

I don't believe in

wasting time at the table.

How'd you come into this place?

It was my father's.

Did he believe in this gold mine?

He believed, but not enough.

Sounds like he was the

brains in the family.

Boiled chicken?

Boiled is better for you.

How's about a little dessert?

I said, how's about a little dessert?

- I heard you the first time.

- You didn't answer me the first time.

Can I ask you a personal question?

When was the last time you had a man?

I hope you don't mind confined

spaces, tomorrow we start tunnelling.

Goddamn, I should've known.

You can always tell a virgin because

the whites of the eyes ain't clear.

I got this theory on

virgins, that they...

...always look peaked and grouchy

because they're going against nature.

I don't want to get calluses

patting myself on the back, but...

...in my time I have put a

gal or two in tune with nature.

I'm sure nature is very grateful.

Listen to me.

Don't let starting

late bother you none.

Some of them late bloomers is...

I'll be outside in the barn if

you feel like getting acquainted,

or talking about tunnelling.

And remember, nature

is the great provider.

Goddamn.

Well, good morning, Spot.

Could use some bacon...

Morning, miss. What's for breakfast?

Conserve your energy.

There's a lot of work to do.

Don't you worry about me,

I know how to pace myself.

If I want to...

...I can do this all day long.

I'm talking about all day long.

Pace myself.

Where are you going?

I wanna...

...take a little Spanish pause.

That's one of the keys

to pacing yourself.

You just go on trimming your wicks.

I can do this all day long.

I'm talking about all day long.

All day long.

Hey, lady!

Understand?

She sure is full of piss

and vinegar today, ain't she?

A lot of literature on Philadelphia.

What's the fascination with

the city of motherly love?

Brotherly.

I'm moving there.

- To Philadelphia?

- Just as soon as I strike gold.

I like it down there in Mexico.

Pace suits me better.

Slow days and fast nights.

What a pleasant surprise.

We saw lights and felt

we weren't intruding.

Oh, Laurette, you're never intruding.

You all remember my husband, Henry.

Welcome to our humble abode.

We brought a little wedding something.

Oh, you shouldn't have.

How pretty.

We was just saying how

much we needed a figurine.

- I'll get us some tea.

- Shall I help?

We'll help.

Don't be long now.

We felt you'd be needing someone

to talk to. Especially now.

What Laurette is trying to say

is that we all have so

much in common these days.

We do?

We're all ordinance brides.

Oh.

Since you've never

been married before,

we all thought we should

have a little chat.

Do you prefer orange

pekoe or lapsang oolong?

You see, a husband has certain rights.

And a wife has certain duties.

And that's where the trouble starts.

Speak for yourself, Laurette.

You know, I rode with Quantrill. Finest

revolver gang in history, till he died.

Quantrill died?

Last year.

That Shorty, he don't even

ask. He just goes right to it.

Those outlaws just don't know

how to take "no" for an answer.

Whitey is so funny.

Why, last night he got all

painted up like an Indian.

And did he go on the warpath!

Say, want to have yourself

a really wild time?

Why not dress up like an Indian?

That sounds like it oughta

be Julia's cup of tea.

I guess I'll go on out and

see how the squaws are doing.

I suppose what we're

trying to say, Julia, is

it's not as much of a

chore as you may have heard.

But, if it should become one,

I have found that the best thing to do

is just think about canning apricots.

Apricots?

Well, for some reason,

apricots just seem to work best.

How are we doing, ladies?

Bye.

- Thank you for the lovely gift.

- Let's do it again real soon.

Nice folks.

They seem content.

Well...

...you know what they say:

"Lady love an outlaw like a

little boy love a stray dog."

We still haven't

cleaned up that table.

You know, I was thinking

about them chairs of yours.

Picking them up, setting them down

through the air. Why, it's poetry.

Think I'm getting a headache.

Pretty soon, all over America,

people's gonna be picking up

chairs and setting them down.

It's gonna be all your doing.

Julia...

...what do you say we try

canning some of them apricots?

"It would be like a

man hauling with one ox

"and looking for two, hoping

for the help of the Lord.

"Why not get rid of all the oxen

"and count on the Maker all the way?"

Very good.

- I look forward to hearing it

on Sunday. - Thank you.

Morning, ladies!

I sure did enjoy them

canned apricots last night.

Julia!

What the hell was that supposed to be?

A joke?

No. You don't understand. A joke

is when you make somebody laugh.

Miss Tate. Please

step into the office.

It's Mrs Moon.

Excuse me. Miss Tate...

- Why, you...

- Henry.

I believe this is between

Mr Polty and myself.

Hey, Moon! It looks like

the honeymoon is over.

What's the matter, Moon? You

look like a dog without a bone.

- Hey, Hector.

- Si.

Why don't you go to the

Mexican side of town,

see what the beans is jumping on?

- Beans?

- Beans.

You know, Polty's just

another word for chicken.

Good one, Towfield.

- Who thought it up for you?

- Let's go chew the fat.

What for?

'Cause I'm in a good mood.

Well, how's about a little snort?

Hey, Peachy.

Bottle of mash and

two glasses, Norvell.

- Not for him.

- What do you mean?

- Sheriff's orders.

- Sheriff didn't tell me.

You don't tell him nothing,

so he don't tell you nothing.

Them's the breaks!

You know, I owe you a special thanks.

What for?

What for? Hell, if you hadn't jerked

me back across the border to the...

...just desserts, so to speak, why...

...I'd never have

been married to Julia.

Thinking on it that way, why...

...you sorta introduced us.

Yeah, Towfield... things is good.

You heard about matches

made in heaven, didn't you?

- Well, I'm in one of 'em.

- Goddamn it, Moon! You stole my girl.

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