Goin' to Town Page #5

for a generous fortune.

Colton name?

Fortune?

Oh, I see what you mean,

but it's out of the question.

I couldn't do

a thing like that.

Ah... too bad.

Wait a minute.

Who is she?

Miss Cleo Borden,

the oil millionairess.

28, black.

She wins again,

Morgan.

This is the most

embarrassing position

I've ever been in.

I feel like an idiot.

On the contrary,

you ought to feel

yourself rather fortunate.

If you'll excuse me,

I'll tell Miss Borden

that you're here.

If you don't mind,

I think I'll have a drink.

I need it.

Yes.

Help yourself.

Oh, how'd you make out?

Everything's practically

set. He's waiting

in the next room.

Well, I'll put the fnishin'

touches to him. Come on.

By the way, I might tell you

he's Mrs. Crane Brittony's

nephew.

What, that dame?

Oh, ain't this

a hot coincidence?

Lead me to him.

My dear, Mr. Fletcher Colton.

Miss Borden.

Oh, how do you do?

How do you do?

Well, you made a swell deal

if you ask me.

Mr. Colton felt a little strange

about all this.

Did you make it clear

that this was just

a business proposition?

Oh, yes, yes.

Not that it's anything

against you personally...

because you look pretty good

to me and all that,

but I just want to let

you know where you stand.

I think I understand.

You're simply buying

your way into society...

through my position in it,

and nothing more.

That's short and sweet.

I couldn't put it

better myself.

All we need now is

to settle the details

for the wedding.

Yeah, give society

somethin' to talk about...

'cause I'm gonna be

Mrs. Fletcher Colton...

of New York, Miami

and Southampton.

By golly, the new

Mrs. Colton must be...

one of them

circus bareback riders.

One thing's sure, Michael.

Life will be a circus

around here from now on.

All right, throw it out.

Yes, ma'am.

Storehouse.

Yes, ma'am.

Throw it out.

And please tell her

that with me are...

Mrs. Plunkett,

Mrs. Pillsbury,

and Mrs. Cranford.

We'd like

to see her at once.

Of course.

And with Mrs. Brittony...

are Mrs. Plunkett, Mrs.

Pillsbury and Mrs. Cranford.

Watch the fun.

This is

positively shocking.

I think it's beautiful,

but I wouldn't tell her.

I should hope not.

There isn't a trace

of one of my ancestors left.

Ooh, good afternoon, ladies.

Charming of you.

Won't you sit down?

We'll have some tea?

No, thank you.

No tea. I suppose you came

here to congratulate me.

We did. We think you've

done extremely well.

Course, when I met you

in Buenos Aires,

I didn't think

we'd ever be related.

Speaking of relatives,

Mrs. Colton, have your

ancestors ever been traced?

Well, yes.

But they were too smart.

They couldn't catch 'em.

I don't suppose

you'll want to stay

in Southampton very long.

And what gave you that idea?

Oh, a little birdie told me.

That birdie must have

been a little cuckoo.

I'm afraid

you're going to fnd it

rather quiet here...

after the way

you're used to living.

Don't let that worry you.

I expect to put life

in the old joint...

I mean, the old place.

Dear! In what way?

Well, you see, this being

the social season down here,

I fgured I'd toss a few parties

to a select crowd.

You're invited.

Of course, I realize you're

an ambitious young woman.

I can see exactly why

you married my nephew.

I know what you have in mind.

Go right ahead.

I'm resting.

You know, I could give you

some good advice,

if you asked me.

You don't ask your enemy

how to win the war.

You're suggesting

I'm your enemy?

Well, you certainly

didn't come here

as a friend.

So you intend

to force yourself upon us.

Force myself on who?

Listen, sister, don't forget...

I'm Mrs. Fletcher Colton

of New York, Miami

and Southampton.

You... You...

Oh, I'll drive you

out of Southampton!

I wonder if they'll

ever come back.

After they hear

what I'm gonna do,

they'll fght to come back.

My dear, what are

you up to now?

Somethin' I been plannin'

for a long time.

Yes? What is it?

I'm gonna give them some

high-class entertainment...

that will put

another "0" in the 400.

Yes, but what sort

of entertainment?

Nice, clean entertainment.

I'm gonna throw

them an opera.

Opera?

Yeah, and you've got to make

arrangements right away...

to get me a tenor

to play Samson.

Do you mean to tell me that

you're going to attempt

Samson and Delilah?

Say, listen, I'll attempt

anything once...

and what's more,

I'm gonna sing Delilah.

But...

I got a lot of respect

for that dame.

There's one lady barber

that made good.

Remember, Donovan.

This is no ordinary case.

It requires

diplomacy and tact.

I have been a successful

private dick for 1 5 years.

If I had my due,

I'd be police commissioner.

(Intercom Buzzes)

Yes?

Mrs. Brittony is here.

Have her come in.

Step out a few minutes,

Donovan.

Sure.

Come right in,

Mrs. Brittony.

Thank you.

Everything is

working out nicely.

I've instructed the detective.

I'm expecting Ivan Valadov

here any minute.

He arrived from Buenos Aires

this morning.

Splendid, Brash.

You always were thorough.

You know, of course,

that this will be

an expensive undertaking.

I'll spare no cost

to disgrace that woman...

and drive her

out of Southampton.

Good. And if we can

depend on Valadov to do his part,

the results should be

even better than that.

Since it's known that

Valadov formerly courted her,

and with the evidence

we hope to get,

we'll have suffcient

to demand a divorce for Colton.

You don't need to worry

about Ivan Valadov

going through with it.

I happen to know what

sort of rodent he is.

(Intercom Buzzes)

What is it?

Mr. Valadov is here.

Send him in.

Mr. Brash,

I am Ivan Valadov.

How do you do?

You know Mrs. Brittony.

Of course, I do.

I had the pleasure

of knowing Mrs. Brittony

quite well.

Send Donovan in.

It was very charming

of you to send for me.

Only because

the situation demands

your particular talents.

This is the plan.

Listen carefully, Donovan.

You too, Mr. Valadov.

Mrs. Colton is giving

elaborate entertainment...

on the Colton estate

on the night of August 1 7.

I think that's

Saturday night.

Let's see.

Yes.

Donovan, I want you...

Mr. And Mrs. Pillsbury.

How lovely of you

to have included us.

Charming of you to come.

How do you do?

How do you do?

Mrs. Crane Brittony.

Delighted to see you

again, my dear. You

look perfectly stunning.

(Laughing)

Ha, ha, ha.

The Earl of Stratton.

A real earl.

If Carrington could

only see me now.

Where did you come from?

England.

You mean this title stuff

is on the level?

It's genuine?

Of course.

May I have the pleasure

of the frst dance?

It would be a privilege

and an honor to dance

with the Earl of Stratton.

Isn't there someplace

we can be alone?

There are

so many things I want

to talk to you about.

So many things you'll

have to answer for too.

All right, where shall we go?

Right this way.

Colton.

May I see you

a minute, please?

Why, certainly.

Pardon me, gentlemen.

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