House Party: Tonight's the Night Page #6

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have a shot at a record deal?

Better than a shot.

I'm gonna go on record right now

and say it is going to happen.

- All right!

- Whoo!

- Now we're talking!

- Yeah!

- This is amazing!

- This is crazy.

All right, uh, so how does this work?

Do we do it here or do we fly to New York?

You know, sign it there?

What's up?

- What you talking about, Willis?

- How does it normally work with the label?

- What label?

- Uh, Kickpower Records?

You know, your label.

You are Keniston Scott, right?

I'm Gary. The limo driver.

Limo...

- Limo driver?

Man, I brought...

I brought those kids there, man.

Whoo!

So why did you pretend like you

were some big shot record executive?

Look, man, I just came in for a drink.

I never said I was anybody.

If there was some misunderstanding,

I'm sorry.

He's got my scotch, dog.

Did you even ask his name?

I saw the suit, he had the attitude,

I just thought...

You thought you knew what

a record executive looks like?

Did you even Google him?

Look, guys,

this seems like an honest mistake.

But what you guys did up there,

that was inspiring.

Look, I might not be in the business...

give up your dreams...

...you end up in a black

suit driving a limo.

Believe it.

Thanks.

Whoo-hoo!

I got them moving again with my set.

No, because it was my set

got the party jumping at first.

Whatever, DJ Duct Tape.

Ready to go back to the party?

I can't go back down there.

They all hate me.

You're really beautiful.

Whoo! Precocious!

Precocious! Precocious!

Just play the music

Get sound together

Friday night

And the club is packed

Yeah, yeah. Dip it low, dip it low.

Yeah, yeah.

Dip it low, dip it low.

Yo, it's a shame, uh, you can't

really mix on the fly.

Because we could have had

a serious battle to see who's best.

What? You wanna battle?

Like... Like you and me?

Yo, wouldn't be a battle.

It'd be an ass whooping. You know that.

All right, you said it. Let's do it.

Age before beauty, son.

That's a great line,

but, um, I'm younger than you, idiot.

Oh, okay.

But prepare to get served

on the ones and twos, homey.

Bring it.

Man, that sounds like

shoes in a dryer.

Always hating, man.

See, I keep it unfamiliar.

A little of what we grew up to...

...but mostly what we growing into.

Check this out.

Oh. Ooh.

That's cool and all, that's cute.

Uh, but check this out, bro.

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

Jump it, you need it

I know you feel it

Like you wanna stay

six in the morning

No one yawning

We no go away

Everybody dancing, prancing

Wind it every way

so get somebody, move

And go to the early day

Party people, lookin' fly

Put your hands up to the sky

Party people,

Put your hands up to the sky

Put your hands

Up to the sky

Put your hands

Up to the sky

Whoo, we blew this thing up.

For reals.

Yo, okay, I gotta admit,

that was mad cool.

Those were some sick fades, yo.

You know, we could do this again,

and you know what?

I think peeps'd like it.

You mean, like a producing

team or something?

Maybe.

You willing to ease up

on the pre-mix a little bit?

Let things happen at the right time?

All right. You willing

to ease up on the old school?

- Call us Bootytime and Hardcap.

- Oh, whoa.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

That's Hardcap and Bootytime.

Don't think I didn't notice that last fade.

It was far from smooth.

You know what it's called?

It's called human. Hell, yeah.

All right, so you can keep

working on mine.

Let's dance.

I'm not really in the mood.

Well, I am. Let's go.

I believe the young

lady is winning the war.

Or what do you call

her? "The piece of sh*t".

Oh, the war ain't over yet, baby.

You see these girls?

They got special powers.

Back up, watch this.

Move out of the way.

Go get you something to eat, b*tch.

Hello, Christopher. How you doing?

May I have this dance?

- What's the matter with you?

Oh, come on, dance with me.

No, no. Right over here.

Uh-uh. Autumn's gone. I'm here, baby.

- Please.

- Now, now, listen, Christopher.

When are we gonna talk about bofa?

- Bofa?

- Mm-hm.

- Bofa these nuts.

Oh!

Yeah, baby.

Oh, come on,

you know you like it.

Yeah, baby. Stop fighting, stop fighting.

Oh, so you like it on the floor.

Hey. No, no. No!

- Come on, cowboy, let me ride you!

Put your head up in here.

Oh!

Relax. Whoo!

Yes, Lord, yes.

Whoo!

Man, uh, I underestimated

your boy Chris.

The man does enjoy his cougars.

Get up in there.

Don't leave one unturned! No!

Oh, so you wanna stay on the floor?

- Okay. I got something for you.

- No, no, no.

Listen, baby, do you know how wet I get...

...when I see you in the morning,

I'm going to get my paper?

Oh, you make we wetter

than a puppy in a downpour.

She about to get in

on that Johnson, Johnson!

- Just lay back, it'll be cool!

- Help me.

I'm-a help you.

- I'm-a help you.

- No, no, no. No, no.

- Victoria, please.

- Please!

Oh, I'm gonna please you.

Ow.

Oh.

Well, looks like somebody

needs a drink now.

Thank you for the dance, Christopher.

Somebody get me a drink.

He's all yours, Twiggy.

All right, everybody,

ain't nothing to see here.

- Looks like you're having fun.

- Really?

You call getting attacked

by a wildebeest, fun?

- Autumn.

- Yo, she get her mouth around the tip?

She get her mouth around the tip?

- No! What are you talking about?

- Not even a taste?

No! DyI... Dylan. Dylan.

You can take your stupid chain back.

- What did you say to me?

- Let go of me, Quentin.

- Quit being such a b*tch.

- You're hurting me.

- Let go.

Yo.

- Mind your business. Step off.

- This is my house, it is my business.

Been bird-dogging my girl all night.

- Step off, punk.

- Yo, get out my house.

And I don't remember inviting Chris Brown.

Come on with it.

You gonna get this ass-whooping...

- ... you been earning since third grade.

- I was thinking the same thing.

Come on, let's go.

- Take it to him, Chris.

- Don't do this.

Oh.

Get him, Chris.

Stick and move, baby.

Mayweather in the house.

Come on, little Chris, come on.

Ha, ha. That's all you got?

Uh-uh. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Oh, okay.

Come on. Come on.

That's my homey. That's my homey.

Get him, Chris.

Oh!

- Oh, damn.

Told you, punk!

Yo, Autumn, let's go.

- We leaving right now.

- Screw you.

What?

- Screw you.

You want this bologna pony?

You can have him.

I'll call one of my other b*tches.

This party's whack.

Later for y'all.

Oh, hell no. Who threw that?

Oh, I swear. Argh!

What on earth moved you

to speak at the reception?

Come on, Mimi,

people do speak at funerals.

Yeah, but, you got up there...

...and said "Don't blame God.

Blame the hump. "

Yes. I was trying to offer comfort.

You saw her in that casket.

Look... Looked like she was

trying to reach out after everybody...

...with that hump holding

her up, just... Grr.

Honestly, they probably

should've cremated her.

You know your Aunt Coot, huh?

You think that hump would burn?

I'm sorry, I know it's your family,

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