I Do... Until I Don't Page #7
The seller's very motivated.
It's really beautiful.
Oh! This is
the seller's agent.
Honey, what do you think?
So just-- why don't you
just take it all in?
I won't be a sec.
Wanna look over there?
Yeah.
Hello.
Hello?
Mom?
Milly? Oh.
Hello?
Oh, honey,
i can't hear you.
I'm gonna call you back.
What?
Hey, it's milly.
Leave a message.
Oh.
Okay, I guess
you're in a bad area,
or maybe it's me.
I don't know.
I couldn't hear you, honey.
We-- we're so excited
that you're coming.
Um, i--
it's been so long.
I feel like I'll hardly
recognize you.
But I will.
I mean, I will, of course.
It's not even a nice thing
to say. I'm sorry.
Um... okay.
Well, call me when you can.
Okay? I love you so much.
So-- so what's the catch?
Call me.
I mean, did someone die
in here or something?
Uh, yes,
but natural causes.
Wait, what?
I've actually
got one that I think
will work for you.
Yeah?
Yeah.
It's an s1k that
we picked up from a yard
in Rhode Island.
Okay.
It's a little rusted out,
but I can sand that out.
It'll rig on there okay?
Oh, yeah.
I can prep the mount today
and then you can take it on
and off whenever you want.
I've never ridden
with the extra weight.
It's like training wheels.
You just gotta be careful
around the turns.
But it provides
extra support.
Sure, sure.
You got yourself
a copilot?
Uh-- well, in theory.
Oh. Is this
a special occasion?
Hopefully. Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. Okay.
I am so thrilled
we can make it work.
Me too.
Thanks so much.
All right. You got it, Mike.
You got it. Paperwork's
on its way to you.
Uh-huh.
Ha!
Okay.
Here we go.
What--
i just signed it.
I don't know
the password.
Is this it--
milly's not coming.
Hmm?
What'd you say?
How's the sex?
Horrible.
It's great.
He wears his glasses
during cunnilingus.
I did that once.
Well--
I am never gonna
live that down.
My vagina felt inspected.
I felt that I was under
scrutiny of some sort.
Why do you think
i can only come
when I have to pee?
What does that have
to do with anything?
Alice, what is going on?
- Can we turn the camera off for a second?
- Of course.
Noah.
What-- what-- this vibe.
I was just being honest
for the sake
of artistic integrity.
A noble cause.
Okay, excuse us.
I just was trying--
sorry. Come here.
Noah.
Pan out, pan out.
What?
Listen.
What's wrong?
Every time we come in here,
you make it seem
like we're miserable.
I think we have
a pretty great life.
Don't you?
- Yes, sometimes, yes.
- Get in there.
I don't think
this is good for us.
We need the money.
F*** the cash.
Fanny's doing it.
Besides, we can't bail.
Is that what this is about?
Your maniac sister
is doing this.
You said we need the cash.
My maniac sister?
Jesus.
You said she's
the most athletic person
you know, so--
okay. Who cares?
Do you think about
sleeping with her?
What? Oh, my god.
Do you?
Why would you
accuse me of that?
I think I've been more
than patient and reasonable
with your moody outbursts.
For someone
who wants a baby so badly,
you're making it
pretty difficult
to want to have sex with you.
You're being irrational
and mean.
I'm being mean?
Yeah.
You're being mean.
I am so nice to you, Noah.
I play tennis for you.
I let you smell my mouth
before I brush.
I listen to widespread panic
for you.
What about me?
What about you?
Well, okay, the most
creative thing I have done
in the past three months
is hem your f***ing pants,
Noah.
Well, there's--
don't bring up
brewing blinds.
Brewing never needs
any new artwork,
and that is the truth,
because you insist that
"we need a visual
that clients can trust."
Basic brand.
I understand that.
But you know what, Noah?
I could have moved
to New York without you,
because Terry Schultz
had that extra room,
those cats easily if I just
took Claritin or something.
Then I could be getting
coffee on my lunch breaks
or buying gesso somewhere.
I could have a mohawk
right now, but I don't,
for you.
So don't tell me
that I'm being mean.
Alice.
No. I will not
have that!
Namaste.
Namaste.
Oh, god.
Fermented burdock?
No, thank you,
my love.
Fanny.
Yes?
No matter what roof
we've lived under,
whether it's tin
or hay or stars,
I feel like we've always
been transparent
with each other.
The hearth of truth.
Yes. The hearth of truth.
It's-- it's just...
This is--
wanting to connect with?
Someone you're wanting
to bring into our bed?
No, it's not that.
I don't know if it's
because I'm getting older
or maybe
I'm losing my edge.
We haven't talked
about the fact
that neither you or I
have brought anyone
into our bed
in nearly six years.
Fanny,
you are so much more
than I could have ever
dreamed of.
And this hearth of truth--
our hearth of truth--
our fire...
I don't know
if I want to share
that warmth
with anyone anymore.
Jesus, al.
Knock sometimes.
I'm sorry. I didn't know
you were in here.
I really didn't.
That's why you knock.
Okay. Well, can i
just go pee?
Yeah. Of course.
No, alone?
Can I go alone?
'Cause i--
yeah, that kind of pee.
I got it. Yeah.
Thank you.
I'd like some privacy.
Yeah, I'm not really sure
if that's what I imagined.
Man, I get it.
It's hard to stick to
the one you're married to
when you could always have
the newer, sexier model,
right.
So, why don't you
live with it.
Yeah?
Right? And if it
doesn't turn you on,
you can always
replace it.
Good point.
Hey, Noah?
Mm-hmm?
Could I just talk to you
for a second, please?
Yeah. Sure.
Excuse me.
Okay. All right.
Sorry. Hey, I just
want to talk to you.
Okay.
Are you taking hydrocodone
because you want to
be with Fanny?
What are you
talking about?
I know you injured
mountain biking,
and you took hydrocodone,
but there's no reason you
should be taking it anymore
unless you're deliberately
trying to sabotage our chances
of having a child,
which was your idea
to begin with.
Okay, where
is this coming from?
I saw you take those pills.
Those pills you take.
Vivian said I should
look out for signs,
and I saw signs.
I saw you
taking those pills.
She said Fanny was "abounding"
with all kinds of stuff,
and we're all baboons--
stop!
Just stop, okay?
Just tell me.
All right.
I don't even know
where to start.
I have to, like--
i--
I'm not taking
hydrocodone.
I'm taking he shou wu.
It's for male pattern
baldness.
"Maherpatterbaldas"?
What's "maherpatter--"
male pattern baldness.
Oh.
Okay?
I got it from a Chinese doctor
that Fanny and Zander
recommended.
I didn't wanna tell you
because I want you
to think of me
as this viral, hunky man,
and not some old dude
with his hair falling out.
But why did you go to Fanny
to talk about that?
Why do you have this secret
meeting with Fanny?
Fanny! Fanny!
Something you won't even
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