It's a Girl! Page #2

But, on the other hand,

they were also talking about

not to have a girl child.

So in a hidden tone, they were

supporting female feticide,

and commenting about,

once you have a child,

then you should not kill them.

But your first child - and everybody

had the same answer -

has to be a boy.

Because you wish for a boy,

as he will make sure your

family lineage continues.

He'll make sure the property of

the family remains in the family,

and he'll make sure the

daughters, his sisters,

will be in safe hands.

Dressed up with flowers

on the head,

wearing all gold jewels,

you got me married.

But I stand here with

tears in my eyes.

One caste, one blood and one

relationship could not be,

so you gave me

away in marriage.

You did not see their

blood and relationship?

But I stand here with

tears in my eyes.

Being brought up

with so much love,

this girl in this awful crowd.

I am stuck and I am struggling.

Is there no way

out of this pain?

In India, as girls grow up

into women,

their plight does not improve.

More than 100,000 are

murdered each year

because they fail

to produce sons

or because their new

husbands or in-laws

are not satisfied with the

dowry they've received.

In 1961, the Indian government

outlawed dowry

to prevent such crimes,

yet the practice still

remains common today.

And a majority of

dowry-related crimes

are never investigated

or prosecuted.

Maya and Raju had four children

- all of them daughters.

I just concentrated on

my four daughters

and I prayed to God that they

would have no difficulties.

We were very happy

with our daughters...

more than we would have

been with a son.

As their eldest daughter,

Latika, got older,

her parents worried she

wouldn't find a man to marry.

Then we showed her this man.

She kept saying she

didn't like him,

but I insisted.

My daughter used to say,

"You are treating me as

a burden. "

"You want to get rid of me. "

After the man agreed

to marry Latika,

Maya and Raju collected

what they could

to put together as a dowry.

And so Latika and the

man were married.

Soon Latika got pregnant and

gave birth to a baby girl.

This made Latika happy,

but upset her husband.

Latika's husband frequently

drank too much

and would abuse her.

Latika though, not wanting

to worry her parents,

didn't tell them about

the abuse.

Then, one day, Maya and

Raju received word

that Latika was in the hospital.

The in-laws said her condition

was very serious

and she can't speak.

I knew they were hiding something,

and I started crying

because I didn't know

what else to do.

By the time Maya and Raju

made it to the hospital,

it was too late.

Latika was dead.

When we saw her, my wife

saw the mark on her neck.

We realized she was dead.

We started crying and wailing.

We lost our senses;

we didn't know how

can he kill her.

They told us a lie and

they cheated us.

We sold half our land and we

gave them so many gifts.

Latika's husband had claimed

she had hung herself.

But Maya and Raju

didn't believe him.

The police arrested Latika's

husband for the killing of his wife

in what is known as a dowry death.

But after a few weeks,

they let him go.

In India, courts frequently

ignore dowry deaths

and other crimes against women.

Now Maya and Raju worry about

Latika's baby girl -

their granddaughter.

They worry for her safety,

living with the man

who killed Latika.

Homes where there is tremendous

violence inflicted on women,

are the same homes

where violence

is killing girls of five and

under at an abnormal rate.

So it is like the female becomes

one of the inadvertent pawns

in this resource exchange,

in a patriarchy.

So you can buy her, sell

her, keep her or kill her,

however you want.

It's like with any resource,

so that is the complete

dehumanization of females.

Dowry and infanticide and

feticide go hand in hand.

The minute dowry

enters a community

everyone becomes

greedy for dowry.

They think this is another way of

getting huge amounts of money.

And they demand huge

amounts in dowry.

And if they're entitled

to get dowry,

then they have to give

dowry as well.

So that becomes reason not to

have girls and daughters.

And so that doesn't matter

whether you are very poor,

or you're very rich in India.

That same logic applies.

If you're very rich,

you're getting foreign BMW's

and Mercedes in dowry,

but you have to give

that also in dowry.

So the logic for why feticide

and infanticide

are occurring today

are actually more...

It is really greed-based.

It is not based on

economic necessity.

It is greed-based,

it's every son is one way

of getting money in,

and every daughter less

is less outflow of money

from within a family.

Poor families who want to avoid

paying expensive dowries

frequently kill or abandon

their newborn daughters.

Wealthier families use

ultrasound machines

to learn the gender of

the child;

then, if the child is a girl,

commit female feticide,

aborting their baby because

of her gender.

Infanticide was a very horrible,

very terrible thing

to live with for the

rest of your life.

So the medical profession provided

an easy, kinder way of killing.

As if killing before birth

somehow made it kinder,

killing behind an operation

theatre table

makes it less gory,

less bloody.

Now infanticide to a

smaller level

has occurred throughout

history in India, China,

and the rest of Southeast Asia.

But when female feticide came,

it was so easily socially

acceptable.

In the worst of times in history,

in Medieval times,

not more than 1, 2, 3, 4

percent girl children

were killed at birth

as infanticide.

But now in modern societies

like India and China,

20, 25, 30 percent girls are

being killed before birth.

The pressure started

the moment they came to

know that I'm carrying twins.

The pressure started to get the

sex determination test done.

Mitu's husband and his mother

demanded Mitu get an illegal

sex determination test

because they feared the

twins would be girls.

When Mitu refused, they

locked her in her room.

The next three days I was not

given anything to eat or drink.

The only thing that

was demanded

was that they wanted a sex

determination test done

and abortion if both babies

are females.

My mother-in-law told me

this in front of my mother,

that for one lac rupees

($2000 USD)

we can get one baby

killed inside my womb,

so if they are girls

at least do that.

Usually in such cases where women

are pressurized they give in.

They feel like the lesser evil will

be to terminate the fetuses,

because that way you're

protecting your own family,

you're protecting your marriage,

and at some point in time

you can give birth to

the so-called son, the

one that is wanted,

and in the process they will

be one happy story,

and the bad stories will

be forgotten.

That is why the sex ratio

in India has declined.

Knowing Mitu was

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