It's Complicated Page #6

not turning out as I

hoped. That's obvious.

Agness started out really looking

up to me. We never used to fight.

But now with

the kid, lately,

we're all about what

school he's going to

and she thinks we need a

bigger house, more help.

I was hoping to

cut back at work,

but now that's

never gonna happen.

And she wants to

have another baby

before Pedro gets

too old, which I get.

But since we're

always fighting...

(CHUCKLES) Oh, God.

Listen to me.

Isn't a baby part of the deal

when you marry a woman that age?

Is it? I guess so.

She's got me booked at the

fertility center every other day,

and she is so amped up

on hormone injections,

I'm gonna have to find an

exorcist if she doesn't calm down.

(CHUCKLES)

I wish it was funny.

Incredible ice cream.

Hmm.

I'm turning around.

Hey, remember when

we used to smoke pot

and eat your ice cream

in the hot tub?

(GIGGLES) The hot tub? That

feels like a billion years ago.

Yeah. How long has

it been since you, uh...

(PUFFS REPEATEDLY)

Me? Since before

Lauren was born.

Twenty-seven years.

At least.

Huh?

(GASPS)

Are you kidding me? Oh, put that

away. Oh! It's been too long.

- Exactly.

- (CHUCKLES) I'm not gonna...

Okay. I'm gonna leave this

for you. It's kind of amazing.

You take a few hits,

get your sea legs back,

and, uh, we'll finish

the rest of it together.

(CHUCKLES) Maybe.

So, that nerdy architect likes

you. You know that, right?

He's not nerdy.

And he definitely doesn't.

We're just...

We're working together.

I was watching while you

leaned over to open the oven,

and his eyes were

glued to your ass.

Hey, do me a favor?

Tell me the truth, Janey. Is

this a great affair or what?

(CHUCKLES) I don't know.

It's my first.

We don't even have to

have sex, and it's fun.

(CHUCKLES)

I wish I could sleep over.

(CHUCKLES) I got to talk to my

shrink about this. This is...

This is a lot to handle.

You better go, I guess.

(EXHALES)

(WHISPERING) It's okay.

(WHISPERING) No.

Whoa!

What is happening, Jake?

(BOTH MOAN)

(PHONE RINGING)

(JANE CHUCKLES)

Don't get it.

I always get it.

I have three kids.

Hello? Hi. You're still

on the phone?

(CHUCKLES) Plane,

I meant plane.

Uh-huh? Well, how was Luke

when you left him?

Oh, that sounds like fun. Yeah,

let me know what I can bring.

No! I have no idea

where he is.

Okay, sweetheart.

I'll talk to you tomorrow.

Oh! Now I'm lying.

Lauren and Harley

are giving Luke

a graduation party this

weekend. Sweet, huh?

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

Hello, stranger.

Welcome back.

I'm, uh, just getting

into my car.

Yeah, this weekend

sounds great.

Let me know

what I can bring.

(EXCLAIMS SOFTLY)

(MOUTHING)

Okay.

(CONTINUES CHATTERING)

(LAUGHS)

Why am I laughing?

I mean, it's like nuts!

(SQUEALS) Dr. Allen.

Jane, hi.

Am I seeing you today?

Oh, no. I just wanted to

talk. And I was wondering

if by any chance you could squeeze

me in for an emergency session?

(CHUCKLES) Because I'm sort

of in desperate need of advice.

I brought you some

coffee cake that you like.

Not as a bribe

or anything. But...

I only have 20 minutes

before my first patient.

Well, that's fine!

I'll talk fast.

So at this point, I just need

some sound, unbiased guidance.

Is having an affair with you-know-who

a good thing or a bad thing?

It's a bad thing, right? This

can't be... How can it be good?

It's not good,

it's not bad.

(MUTTERS)

I've made a list

of everything

this could possibly

be about at my end.

May I read it to you?

Oh, please, of course.

Uh...

(CHUCKLES) Because

I e-mailed it to myself.

(CHUCKLES)

Okay. "Am I still trying to

figure out why the marriage failed?

"Do I want to

get back together?

"Do we have

unfinished business?

"Is this about revenge?

Or am I...

(SHAKY VOICE)

"Am I just lonely?

"Or is it my

caretaker thing?"

I mean, the kids

are finally gone now,

and all of

a sudden Jake is back,

and I get to take care

of him in some way.

Now, I understand. I get how

therapy works. I really do.

We look at things, we examine

them. Weeks turn into months.

And we're going

on eight years now.

(CHUCKLES)

And I'm okay with that.

I really am, believe me.

I... I like it, I do.

But in this case, I need you to

tell me what you really think.

Like, "Don't do this."

You know,

I'd like you to say,

"Don't do this.

It's absolutely wrong,"

or, "Go ahead.

You'll be fine."

I actually want to

be told what to do.

What's interesting is, I'm

already seeing you open up

more than you have

in some time.

I'm thinking,

through this affair,

you may learn to view the

world in a different way.

I'm sorry, what... I just

need something more concrete.

I'm... Are you saying that

I should just keep seeing him?

Because honestly,

I think that if the guilt...

The guilt and the fear could

go away, I could just...

I could let go a little

bit and, um, you know,

I could figure this out.

I wouldn't resist

looking at this.

(SIGHS)

Okay. And another way of

saying that might be...

Let go, Jane.

It can't hurt.

Thank you.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

NURSE:
Santa Barbara

Fertility Center,

will you please hold?

Thank you.

Jacob Adler?

Have fun.

Okay, you know the drill. You can

hang your things in the closet.

The remote's on the dresser, and

the materials are in the drawer.

Please deposit your

specimen in the cup,

and I'll see you

when you're done.

(SIGHS)

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

Hey, where are you?

(STUTTERS) Uh,

I'm at the office.

Want to grab some lunch?

Absolutely. When?

Can you do it now?

I have about an hour.

We could meet at the

Stanhope, get room service.

I'll be there in 10.

See you there, Adler.

She's coming back.

HARLEY:
Oh,

I'm not kidding.

That is exactly what the

guy said. I'm stunned.

Look at me.

I'm still stunned.

Oh, by the way, I talked

to my brother this morning

and he is so excited

about his party.

Really?

- Mmm-hmm.

- Great!

We can fit 40 people

in our place, can't we?

Absolutely.

People won't sit down, but...

(GIGGLES)

HARLEY:

No big deal, right?

HOTEL CLERK:
Hi.

- Reservation. The name is Adler.

Hey. There's your...

My what?

And here's your key.

(COUGHING)

(GASPING)

Harley!

I'm really sorry, I

didn't mean to spit on you.

- I just had to kiss you.

- While you were choking?

Yeah, but it worked. 'Cause

I'm not really choking anymore.

Who did you just see?

No one. That was weird.

I thought it was your cousin

from... From... Oh, my sweet lord.

Now what?

Honey, I just totally forgot.

I have

a conference call at 1:15.

Back at the office,

so I gotta go.

Waitress! Honey, I'm serious. Stop

eating. Help me call the waitress.

Anyone over here. Look

over there. Call that one.

No. Harley. Harley. Harley.

Harley, we can't leave.

We're meeting with

the wedding specialist.

Yeah, and you know what?

Mmm, I just don't know if today's

the best day for me for that.

Oh, my God!

(ROMANTIC SONG PLAYING)

WOMAN:
(SINGING)

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