Jamie's Christmas Lock-In

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It's Christmas.

It's time to party!

I am throwing the

ultimate Christmas party.

And, guys, it's a lock-in!

We got turkey farmers.

Turkey farmers.

We got the old-age pensioners.

This is the cool corner.

Jonathan Ross.

Get off. Get away from here.

Come on, a lock-in

wouldn't be a lock-in

without the Essex corner.

Come on, guys.

Nanny's back.

Thank you very much, darling.

Of course, the beautiful

Charlotte Church.

You're going to be singing

two songs for us tonight.

You're going to be singing two

songs for us tonight. I am, yes.

I'm so looking forward to it.

A bit of class.

Now, Christmas would not be Christmas,

without a nice Christmas fairy

and we have our very own one tonight.

Mr Louie Spence, everybody.

Oh, Jamie!

Right, come with me.

No, let me show you.

We're going to be cooking a lit bit of meat.

Come out here.

Oh, I'm going for a basting!

On the menu tonight, I've got a

feast of festive treats for you.

I'm going to show you three amazing

new ways to cook your turkey.

I nip round to Jonathan Ross's house,

to cook up a Christmas treat

with an international flavour.

Louie Spence takes on my

Boxing Day burger challenge.

I do a lovely mince.

I do a lovely mince.

Do you do a nice mince?

And Charlotte Church gets her

laughing gear round my pink popsicle.

Amazing!

Plus, find out what the great

British public really think of me.

How would you like to see Jamie

Oliver die, if he had to die?

Boiled in a pot.

CHEERING:

Right, it's Christmas, it's the one

time of year when everyone cooks,

even the non-cooks.

And when they cook, what do they cook?

They cook a turkey. Look at it.

This is technically the hardest meat

to cook out of all of them and my

buddy Adam is going to show us

three new ways from all over the world

that are going to blow your mind.

Check this out.

Adam, what are we doing over here?

A beautiful spit roast.

This is one of the most

traditional ways of cooking meat.

You probably don't know it, but

the word barbeque comes from a

French-Arabic word barbe et ton cul,

which means from your beard, barbe,

to your arsehole, your cul.

That's actually where

the word came from.

So what's the good thing about

cooking turkey in this way?

All sides are going to be crispy,

golden brown, delicious.

Everybody gets a great piece.

Also, evenly cooked as well.

OK. So there you go,

spit roast turkey, guys.

The second one we're going to do

is we're going to cook turkey

in a rock salt cave.

What you do is you go

to the supermarket,

you get the big rock salt bags.

You crack an egg in it.

I've got some lemon zest in it,

fennel seeds, and then you get a

big old roasting tray and you make a sandcastle.

That's all you want.

You get a sandcastle and then

you basically create a cave.

I know, I know, I know.

You're going to think I'm

mad, but bare with me.

Make your decision at

the end of the show.

What we're going to do is basically trap

the flavour of the turkey in the cave.

I'm going to cook this for

the same amount of time

as my regular turkey. This is an experiment.

What do you reckon?

I think it's going to work.

Right, last but not least,

guys, check this out.

We're going to be cooking

deep-fried turkey.

AUDIENCE GROANS:

Tell us a little bit about the

American deep-fried turkey.

Is it unhealthy? Is it greasy?

Actually, it's not, because

when you think about it,

what would absorb the grease

would be the breading

and this doesn't have breading.

So batter and breading

is what absorbs the fat?

How long does that take to cook?

Just under an hour for

a bird this size.

So, guys, how long do you cook your turkeys for?

Four, five hours? One hour!

Basically the score is this.

We're going to do these

three ways of cooking.

We're going to have our celebrities

choose the best one that they love

and then the best one that wins is

going to be fed to the whole pub.

Brother, I'll see you later.

Thank you, brother.

Thank you, brother. Take care.

OK, talking about lovely

juicy birds, I have got

a nice bird at the bar.

She is beautiful, she is classy and

she has got a lovely pair of lungs.

It is the lovely Charlotte Church.

CHEERING:

OK, lovely people.

Charlotte, hello, darling?

How you doing?

We're going to make some cocktails.

I've dedicated a cocktail to you.

It is called the Charlotta.

Tell me that you want a Charlotta.

Do you want one?

Let me tell you about this

beautiful thing that's going on.

We have a little bit of sugar.

Then we put angostura bitters on

like that, just a little bit.

Then we put that in a little

champagne glass, like this.

Then we have a little bit of whisky.

You could use brandy.

Just a swig, cos it's classy.

Then I go for a little bit of orange.

To that we want to extract the oil.

Yeah!

Then we have a little

bit of champagne,

because you are a classy bird.

Debatable, definitely.

I don't know if you guys knew this, but

Charlotte actually grew up in a pub like I did.

Kind of, but it was when

I was of drinking age

that my parents had a pub.

Oh, that sounds dangerous.

No, not at all. It was probably...

CORK POPS:

..preferable, really.

How old were you when

you moved into the pub?

Well, like, 18.

Did all your mates go, "Brilliant.

Lock-in"?

Absolutely.

So tonight, is like a

real thing for you.

So tonight, is like a real thing for you.

Yeah, a proper lock-in.

Proper like the old days.

Proper like the old days. Have a look at this cocktail.

Can you see the fizz that's going on?

Have a little taste of it.

Now, guys, let's all be honest.

Christmas, a beautiful time

of year, family, friends,

all that sort of stuff.

Must of us, if we're honest,

when we go home, one of us gets sat

next to someone a bit boring, yeah?

If you make a Charlotta, it

makes people interesting.

Wow!

It does, so try that at home.

It's a beautiful thing.

It's really nice.

By the way, if I was to

show you these things here,

what does it say to you?

It says a cheeky Vimto.

Have you ever had a cheeky Vimto?

Yeah.

It's not just a Welsh thing?

No, no.

I've actually frozen it and

made you a proper alcopop.

Amazing, a cheeky Vimto ice lolly.

That is going down. This is not...

I can't really do this on television.

Get it down you!

That was lovely.

Maybe we should swap.

I'd like to see you do that, actually.

Let's swap. You go.

Go for it, honey bunch.

It's good, though.

My God.

Have you ever actually had a cheeky Vimto?

Cheeky Vimtos are like...

You make it for me now, cos

I haven't got any clue what

you're talking about.

I come from Essex, we do lager.

I need a bigger glass.

What, a pint glass?

What, a pint glass?

Exactly.

Bring me a pint glass.

Here you are.

So how do you do it?

Give me rough quantities so the

British public can make this at home.

Basically, it's supposed

to be a single measure.

First, roughly a single shot of...

What is it, port?

No, that definitely a double.

That's a pint glass.

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