Jayne Mansfield's Car
CROWD:
We don't wantyour f***ing war!
One, two, three, four,
we don't need your f***ing war!
- What do you think?
- What do you want to eat?
- Hell, I don't care.
- Let's get some salmon patties.
Well, sh*t.
- MAN:
When do we want it?- CROWD:
Now!No more war! No more war!
- MAN:
When do we want it?- Now!
- What do we want?
- Peace.
- When do we want it?
- Now.
- What do we want?
- Peace.
- When do we want it?
- Now.
A**holes.
MAN:
You should be ashamedof yourself, Caldwell.
- My cousin's over there now.
- Come on, come on.
We don't want your f***ing war.
- Hey, smile for the camera.
- One, two, three, four.
We don't want your f***ing war.
One, two, three, four.
We don't want your f***ing war.
Let's go.
I hear Tate Scott
might run for Sheriff
if Orville Allen retires.
Goddamn Tate Scott.
The whole damn bunch is Yankees
got nothing running through
their veins but Cincinnati blood
from Ohio. They're from Ohio.
You ought to have
to be from here
to run for office,
the way I see it.
Well, they've been here
some 40-odd years though, Jim.
I don't give a sh*t.
- Born and bred a Yankee.
- MAN:
Okay.- And plus...
- Yeah, yeah, bye.
...he got the grin of a queer.
Jim, there's a riot going on
down the street.
a bunch of hippies.
Your boy's the ringleader.
Oh.
Would you do the same thing
if we were the Klan?
a bunch of dopeheads
like y'all in?
Seriously, man.
That's not what I'm saying.
What in God's name's
going on here?
You, get up. Come on.
Get up. Get up here.
Come on.
Come on, come on, come on.
Come on. Come on.
What the hell do you think
you're doing?
Get up here.
God damn it.
You're making me look bad.
You un-American son of a b*tch,
you're making me look bad
- out there on the street.
- That's bullshit, Daddy.
No, it's not bullshit. Hey.
Hey.
Well, that's real brave,
hitting me when I'm handcuffed.
Yeah? Well, I'll un-handcuff
you, you little bastard,
then I'll beat the living
dogshit out of you.
I'm tired of getting you bailed
out of all your monkey business.
Now you go to the jailhouse,
act like a human being
and apologize.
And I'll come post your bail and
I'll try to straighten it out,
if that's possible.
All right?
- You're a sad old man.
- Yeah? Oh.
- I'll bail myself out.
- All right.
You go your way
and I'll go mine.
Right. Then you go your way
right to the jail.
- Take him away.
- Come on, Carroll.
- Take him away.
- Let's go.
Go on, arrest his ass.
Bastard.
What's up, baby?
What's up?
Hey. Daddy feed you all right?
Daddy feed you?
Daddy feed you, huh?
Did Daddy feed you?
Come on. Come on.
What's the word, Jimbo?
JIMBO:
Sh*t, I don't know.Where's Daddy?
Sh*t, I don't know.
He took off in his truck.
He's been acting weird lately
like everybody else
in this f***ing family.
Skip,
the salad dressing's mixed.
Oh, Skip, if you're gonna be
up all night,
you're gonna have to
cut down the radio.
I've been listening
to underground music.
Carroll got me
to doing it, yeah.
It's real different kind of
music.
But the program don't start
till midnight,
so that's how come
I had to be listening so late.
Well, it don't sound
like it's underground.
It sounds like it's right
in the room with me.
Carroll says if you listen
to underground music,
it'll open your mind up.
That means just take LSD...
opening your mind.
Goddamn Carroll.
That's all this town needs...
a damn hippie peace march.
the park in their own sh*t.
Carroll says we got no business
being in Vietnam.
He says it's in vain
or something.
That's easy for Carroll to say.
He ain't fighting
the little bastards.
Somebody's got to fight
the bastards.
You know, Carroll actually did
his fighting, Jimbo.
What's that supposed to mean?
Tell me, Skip.
Uncle Carroll says that he's
fighting for freedom and peace.
Shut up.
In a peaceful way.
Shut up.
Jimbo, come on, honey.
You ain't one to talk.
You're 50 years old,
still living at home,
driving up and down the road
in them sports cars
like a damn teenager.
You got no kind of life,
no kind of job,
chasing after any old wore-out
whore who will talk to you.
You're nearly 50
and you live here too, Dad.
I thought I told you to shut up.
Take it easy, honey.
JIMBO:
At least I didn't turn out to be
some freak like you and him did.
Why don't you go live with him,
polish each other's medals...
while you're protesting
the damn war?
They say Tate Scott
might run for Sheriff.
If that damn Yankee gets in,
we're all screwed.
We'll be eating Cincinnati chili
full of cinnamon in it.
- How would you like that?
- A phone call, Mr. Caldwell.
Well, I'm eating my supper.
Tell them I'll call them back.
It's long-distance
from England.
- From where?
- England.
England?
Hmm.
Uh-huh. England?
Hello.
MAN:
Mr. James Caldwell?Yeah. Yeah, this is
Jim Caldwell.
This is Phillip Bedford,
Mr. Caldwell.
Well...
that was Phillip Bedford...
that son of a b*tch's son.
JIMBO:
What the hell did he want?
Your mama's dead, son.
Died today of cancer.
Yeah.
Wants to be buried here
with her people,
so they're bringing her back.
Who's bringing her back?
That English bastard
and his kids.
Well, they can't come here.
They ain't welcome.
Well, I ain't happy
about it neither,
but we got to put up with it.
She deserves to be
with her people.
It don't matter
what she done to us.
So...
I believe
the funeral's on Saturday.
All right?
Tell your brothers
and call your sister.
Yeah.
JIMBO:
Yes, sir.Lord have mercy.
Yeah. Yeah.
DOROTHY:
Poor Miss Naomi,
dying all the way over there
in England.
I only met her that one time
when I was little.
She was a free-spirited woman.
How come her to leave
Mr. Caldwell like that?
I love Jim Caldwell,
but he ain't
the most romantic man
in the world.
And Miss Naomi...
she wanted to travel,
see new things.
And he wouldn't take her.
So one time she just
up and went by herself.
Met that man over there.
Then she come back over here,
divorced Mr. Caldwell,
went back over there
and married Mr. Bedford.
I think he thought
she'd come back to him one day.
Not like this.
JD, JD.
Mm. Yeah, bud?
I had some strawberry mescaline
go missing.
It wouldn't happen to be
- JD:
Got to be.- Hang on, hang on.
Mm-hmm, I got all that good sh*t
traveling around my brain.
Just play nice next time,
partner, and ask.
- What, baby? What?
- Look.
You will bear someone else's
Fertile seed...
Well, okay.
Evil woman, don't play
your games with me...
Hey, buddy.
What's going on?
Are you okay, buddy?
When did Mama
visit us last time?
Was it last 4th of July?
No. No, it was, like,
when Aunt Mary Beth died.
Remember,
she brought you that hat...
that Scottish hat?
Mama died, Carroll.
They called from England.
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"Jayne Mansfield's Car" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 22 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/jayne_mansfield's_car_11206>.
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