Keep 'Em Flying

Synopsis: When a barnstorming stunt pilot decides to join the air corps, his two goofball assistants decide to go with him. Since the two are Abbott & Costello, the air corps doesn't know what it's in for.
Genre: Comedy, Music, War
Production: Universal
  1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
7.0
PASSED
Year:
1941
86 min
62 Views


Oh, Mother,

isn't he wonderful?

He said he was simply dying

to meet my mother and father.

He gave me

these passes...

'cause he was positively

dying to meet you all.

Jinx, in case

you're interested,

there's a girl down

here waiting for you...

Three of her,

complete with families.

I was afraid of that.

Locate those two pals of mine

and tell them to get rid of'em.

I'll talk to that

air-crazy baboon.

- What are you trying to do, ruin me?

- Yes, Mr. Gonigle.

You stay up so long,

my sideshows are starving.

- Now get down here!

- I'll come down when I get good and ready.

There's gotta be something in your corny show

to give the customers their money's worth.

When that lug gets down here,

tell him he's fired!

All right, friends,

it's only a dime.

Fun for the

entire family.

It's wacky, it's daffy,

it's crazy!

You'll all have fun.

We're here to make you happy.

Where's that nitwit partner of

yours? He was here a minute ago.

You guys are as dizzy

as your pal up there.

Get over to the

"hit the umpire" concession.

Another guy got hit in the head...

that's the fifth umpire I've lost.

Joe, take over here. And keep that

little fat partner out of my sight.

Every time I turn around,

he's under my feet.

Uh-oh!

You'll have to get off.

This is as far as I go!

Take it easy.

Take it easy, boss. Come on, you!

It's one dime.

The crazy house.!

Goofier and dizzier than

anyplace you've ever been.

Get to work!

Go on, you.

What are you pushing for? Get in!

Get up!

What are you doing?

Just do as the boss tells

you. What are you gonna do?

You like to play ball

games? I love baseball.

What part do you like to play?

I want to be the big boss!

I want to be the umpire. You are

the umpire! Everything all right?

Friends, step right up. Three

balls for a dime. Kill the umpire!

Kill him, neighbor.

Knock his brains out.!

Get another boy. My mother

never raised no foolish children.

Look, they're only cheap balls. Yeah?

Wait a minute!

Come here.

I'm going home. I forgot something. What?

I forgot to stay there.

Here. There's a protector.

Put that on.

When the ball hits the

protector, it bounces off.

This is a protector?

Certainly.

And the ball bounces off

the protector? Certainly!

Did you ever figure out what makes

the ball bounce off the protector?

What?

My head!

Will you listen? See that bat? Yeah.

I have absolute control

over it with this button.

I press the button, they throw the

balls, the batter hits the ball.

Somebody throws, you press, and

the bat hits the ball? That's all.

Don't forget.

Push the button.

- Okay.

- Ooh!

Wait until I say "ready. " What'd you say?

I said, "Wait until I say ready"! Okay.

What's the matter with you?

Put your shirttail in!

Who do you play for,

Brooklyn? Get back there!

Not until I say

"prepared. "

You thought I was

going to say "ready. "

All right, folks,

step right up.!

Kill the umpire!

Knock his

brains out.!

That's the idea of the game. Blackie!

Blackie! Blackie! Never mind that.

Wait a minute! That's enough. Take it easy.

What's the matter

with you?

Stay back there

where you belong.

That's enough. I'm

through. What's going on?

What are you beefing about? Don't push me.

Don't tell me I can't quit.

I can quit. That's the boss.

What do I...

Hello, boss.

This guy's using my head

for a baseball.

I'll use it for a football

if you don't get back to work!

Aw, poison ivy.

Now you made me say

a rash word.

Uh-oh!

Come back here! Wait a minute, Gonigle.

I wouldn't hit him if I

were you. You wouldn't?

Well, you're not me. But if I was you,

I'd take my plane and get out of here!

You're grounded!

Yeah?

Then this'll make two of us.

Come on, boys,

let's get out of here.

Bull's-eye.

Go ahead, Jinx.

Did you fall down? Oh,

he hurt himself. Poor kid.

You're fired.

You get out too!

If I ever find you here again,

I'll have you thrown out!

We've been thrown out

of better places!

You won't get back! We didn't

get back on the other ones.

Oh!

Boy, what a place.

May I take your hat?

Who's gonna pay

this check?

I'll pay it.

We're gonna celebrate.

Celebrate getting fired?

You don't think I'd let Gonigle

fire us if I wasn't ready?

We got a real job now.

A real job?

We're in the army.

Buck privates?

No, in the air corps. The order just came

through to report at the Cal-Aero school.

Get this. They're gonna pay me a

salary while I'm learning to fly!

Pay you a salary to learn

to fly? That's right.

At last, I'll get my wings! Wings!

Come on, will you

pick yourself up?

What's the matter with you? Excuse me.

Daddy, Daddy! You always get

that look when you see a girl.

Not me. I'm not gonna

fall just for anyone.

I'm gonna wait until the right

girl comes along, and here she is.

That was a fast romance. Never mind that.

Sit down

over here.

This is swell.

I'll have a hamburger. Quiet!

Order something from the menu. Okay.

Jinx, there's one thing you

overlooked about the army. What's that?

No women. You'll hate

that. I never thought of it.

We need a union.

What kind of union?

A woman-hater's union.

We should organize it.

Every union has officers. Those in

favor of me being president, say "aye. "

Aye!

The "ayes" have it.

You gotta have

a vice president.

Those in favor of me being

vice president? Aye!

You wanna be a whole union?

We wanna be something.

I'm elected president, so I

appoint you secretary. Swell.

I'm gonna be something,

or I'll stuff the ballot box!

How much money have

you got? Thirty dollars.

You be the treasurer.

All right?

I'm gonna be treasurer

with my own $30?

What's wrong with that? That's not fair.

We've got $10 apiece

in this treasury,

so be careful how you

handle our money!

We won't walk with a woman, talk

to a woman or look at a woman.

It's a deal. Okay? Shake.

That's the boy.

One for all, and all for one!

That's what I say.

One for all, and all for me.

Never thought I'd fall

But now I hear love call

I'm getting sentimental over you

Things you say and do

Just thrill me

through and through

I'm getting sentimental over you

I thought I was happy

I could live without love

Now I must admit

love is all I'm thinking of

Won't you please be kind

And just make up your mind

That you'll be sweet and gentle

Be gentle with me

I'm getting sentimental over you

Never thought I'd fall

But now I hear love call

I'm getting sentimental over you

All the things you say and do

Just thrill me through and through

I'm getting sentimental over you

I thought I was happy

I could live without love

Now I must admit

love is all I'm thinking of

Won't you please be kind

And just make up your mind

That you'll be sweet and gentle

Be gentle with me

I'm getting sentimental

Over you

Thank you.

It isn't easy

to say good-bye.

It's been a grand engagement,

and you've all been wonderful.

I wouldn't dream of

leaving for any other job,

except the one I'm going to:

the hostess corps of the U.S.O.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes

True Boardman

True Boardman (April 21, 1882 – September 28, 1918) was an American film actor of the silent era. He appeared in 137 films between 1911 and 1919 before falling victim to the 1918 flu pandemic. more…

All True Boardman scripts | True Boardman Scripts

0 fans

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:

0 Comments

    Translation

    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)

    Citation

    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:

    Style:MLAChicagoAPA

    "Keep 'Em Flying" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 18 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/keep_'em_flying_11648>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    Keep 'Em Flying

    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.


    Quiz

    Are you a screenwriting master?

    »
    Who played the character "Wolverine" in the "X-Men" series?
    A Ryan Reynolds
    B Hugh Jackman
    C Chris Hemsworth
    D Robert Downey Jr.