King's Ransom Page #4

Ain't nobody starin'...

at that fine, apple-bottom,

jelly-shakin'--

-l'm trippin'.

-Just want to bite it.

Am l crazy? Huh?

Am l some crazy lady

standing out here, crazy?

Seeing things

that didn't really happen?

ls that the problem?

You know what?

Don't even say anything.

You know why?

l've had enough of this.

You can't handle this anyway.

-l'm out.

-OK, be on out, then.

Ain't nobody tryin' to mess...

with Miss Hand Signals

in the first place.

Keep it movin'!

Excuse me, baby. Um...

That your man over there?

Oh, hell, no.

Malcolm King is not my man.

Oh, Malcolm--Malcolm King?

That's who you was talking to?

That's what l said.

Excuse me.

You're excused, baby. Yeah.

Well, Malcolm King, uh...

it's time for you to take a nap.

Nighty-night, Malcolm.

Ha ha ha ha!

Welcome!

Welcome and thank you

for coming out...

to King Enterprise's

tenth anniversary celebration!

Come on!

Everybody, let's eat,

celebrate, and have fun!

Good to see you.

Good to see you.

Good to see you.

All right, all right.

Thank you, thank you.

Excuse me, excuse me.

Coming through here.

You guys enjoy, all right?

Drinks on me!

Ohh. l'm--l'm feeling

kind of tired right now...

so l think l'm just

gonna call it a night...

and, uh...go home

and get some sleep.

All right.

Well, l'll call around...

for the limo driver

to bring your car around front.

-OK?

-All right.

-You get some rest.

-Good night.

-All right, baby. Good night.

-All right.

Hey, thanks for

coming out tonight, man.

Excuse me.

All right, enjoy.

ls your brother outside?

Oh. He was when l last checked.

Uh, well,

ladies and gentlemen...

l'm leaving. Uhh! Mmm! Whoo!

lt's 11 :
02,

and, uh, boy, am l tired.

So, uh, ladies and gentlemen,

just enjoy the party.

l'm just gonna go home

and take a nap...

escorted by no one.

Have a good night. Bye. Enjoy!

What's up, man?

Thanks for coming out.

All right, ladies. Let's go.

All right, let's go! Now!

Adios!

Um...oh, it's 11 :02!

-Byron.

-Uh...

Don't screw this up, Byron.

Listen to me.

All right.

Enjoy the party, ladies.

Enjoy the party.

All right.

Hey, brother, have fun, man.

Byron!

You better stop that limo.

He called for a limo.

l am not playing with you.

Mmm.

Uhh!

Where the hell is the limo?

Hey, you all right?

You OK?

D-d-d-d-don't m-m-m-move.

Ow!

Ah ha ha ha ha ha!

OK.

-You all set?

-Yep.

Whatever!

OK, l'm ready.

-OK. You all set?

-Yeah.

What is that?

Oh, l brought this

because l thought...

we could maybe use it

for something.

No. What in the hell

are you wearing?!

Angela, you told me

to wear all black.

You did say that.

No. Everybody knows

she loves Jesus.

Put this on.

He's gonna know it's you.

-There he is.

-Oh. There's the limo.

Bring your ass here.

Enjoy the party, ladies.

Enjoy. All right.

Where the hell you been, man?!

Uh...

Excuse me.

Pardon me.

Where the hell you been, man?

l've been standing out here

freezin' my ass off.

l--l--l--

''l--l--l--''

Spit it out!

Sh-shut up and g-g-get in.

Oh. Oh, l see.

That's a good touch, man.

You want people

to see me get kidnapped.

OK, hold on, hold on, hold on.

Help! Help!

l'm being kidnapped!

Open the door.

Open the door, stupid.

Ha ha. Help me!

Help me!

OK, now push me in.

Push me--push me in!

Uhh!

OK, they're on the move.

They're on the move, ladies.

This is it.

Here we go, here we go,

here we go!

Man, what happened

out there, huh?

You almost blew it.

And what happened

to the chloroform?!

Mm--

But the gun...

Ahh, the gun was a nice touch.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Now take me to the hotel.

My black ass is tired.

D-d-d--

''D-d-d-d-d-d,

d-d-d-d-d-d-d--''

Just shut up

and take me to the hotel!

Jerk.

Heh heh.

Hello, 9-1-1?

Help!

Please help me!

Oh, help me, help me!

l'm being kidnapped...

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Ah ha ha ha ha!

Whoo!

l love it when

a plan comes together.

Ahh!

That's what

l'm talkin' about. Mmm!

What the--

N-n-n-no!

Hey, s-s-stutter box!

What the hell

are we stopping here for, huh?

Perfect. Everything's

going according to plan.

You did that?

Yeah. l tinkered

with the engine a little bit.

Hey! Hey! Look, man,

l ain't got all night...

to be sittin' out here on

the side of the road with you!

Get me to the Terrance Hotel!

Didn't want to do this...

Huh?

Stop what you're doing.

Get in the trunk.

Get in the trunk!

But--but--but--but--

No, no!

Hey, what's the holdup?

Are you deaf?

What's the holdup?

Get out of the car, jackass!

Ain't gonna be too many more of

those jackasses, all right?

And what's up with this mask

all of a sudden?

Oh, l get it.

l see.

We're switching vehicles...

just in case

we were being followed.

And the mask is

so nobody can identify you.

Oh! Smart. That's smart!

Damn, y'all planned

this out good!

OK, who the hell are they, huh?

Let me make something clear,

all right?

l don't care

what y'all talked about...

but l ain't payin' y'all

no more money.

So whatever

y'all gettin' right now...

y'all just gonna have

to split three ways.

Hey.

Hey. Come on, give me this.

Oh!

Now, come on,

everybody get in the car.

l got to go.

Move your asses! l got to go!

Help! He-help!

Oh! Ooh!

Aaaaaah!

Aaah!

Aaah!

Ohh.

Ohh.

Oh! Ooh.

Are you all right, Mr. King?

Nighty-night.

Hey, what's going on here?

One second. There you go. Ohh!

What in God's name

is going on here?

You've made a mistake, sir.

That's our property.

Look. All right?

-Aah!

-Oh! OK.

l don't want

to hurt anybody, honest.

l just want him.

-Yeah.

-OK.

Go around, hop in.

Oh, we're going to hell.

Ooh!

Hello?

Condoleezza,

J-Jesse Jackson...

Colin Powell

showed up and--and...

l lost him.

l'm sorry, l'm sorry.

What do you mean,

you l-lost him?

-l--l--

-How did you l-lose him?

B-b-b-but l'm sorry,

l'm sorry, l'm sorry.

Where are you?

L-locked in the limo trunk.

Where the hell is he?!

Come on. lt's OK.

lt's all right.

Watch your knees. All right.

There you go. Come on. Whoa.

Careful. There you go.

Come on. OK. All right.

Where am l, man, huh?

You're at my house.

Hey, hey. Who--who are you?

Whew. Oh, what am l doing?

l don't have the heart for this.

Man, l'm no kidnapper.

Well, hell, man...

l don't have experience

in kidnapping, either.

And your sister never told me

you were so reckless.

Oh, wait a minute.

You know my sister?

Wait, wait. Know her?

-l'm sleeping with her.

-Eww.

She was the one

that helped me...

come up with this plan

for you to kidnap me.

You're the dude

with the jacked-up shoes.

Ha ha ha ha!

Ha ha.

Oh, my God.

You took my plan

to a whole 'nother level, man.

-l did?

-Yeah.

Hey, the way you came

to my job and cased it.

Right.

And the masks.

And the--and the--

and the switching of the cars.

Ohh.

Oh, man!

And then bringing me...

to this hole-in-the-wall

crackhouse.

Yeah, man. 'cause

they would've recognized me...

down at the Terrance Hotel.

Man, this was smart

bringing me here.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes