Laggies
Oh, my God... Freedom.
I feel like my mascara's
running, is my mascara running?
It looks good. Like the
cover of Courtney Love's album.
You just need a crown.
There's a crown.
Hey, Noel, Noel,
can we borrow your crown?
We just need it for like a second.
Wow.
We just got the royal finger.
What did we just go through?
I mean, what was that, a prom
or a Celine Dion listening party?
Don't shoot this part.
Okay, what is this place? Tell us...
You'll see when we get there.
Okay, we're doing 20 questions.
What is this place?
- Do they have food?
- Not have 20 questions.
What, you
can't just ask a question?
Aren't we just going to the
hotel? I'm very confused.
I just want to
say, "Hey, what's up?" to
all of the future versions of ourselves
watching this right now.
I hope that we all learn to be as
happy and beautiful
'cause they are going to have
the best prom night of any of us.
Hold on, let me get this.
Tonight could've bit ass.
Except it didn't
because we were together.
Don't make me cry. My mascara is
already f***ed up enough as it is.
You look pretty!
Guys, I love our group.
Guys, what are we doing?
Chill out, just live a little.
We're not going to get caught.
This is not legal. This is not legal.
Danielle, you're going to love
that you did this later on.
And Savannah's getting naked.
Oh, no. No, no, no.
No, Danielle.
If we get a rare
disease from this water,
at least we'll all die together.
I'm not leaving
my dress on the wet ground.
It's dry-clean-only
and my mom will kill me.
One, two, Celine Dion!
No, no, no.
You can no longer work
on your taxes from 1998.
Yeah, I cannot amend
your '98 return. No.
Hi, Dad.
No, no, no, I'm not
laughing at your situation.
Yeah. No, there's a strict
statute of limitations.
So sorry, I'm so sorry.
I didn't realize my dad
wanted me to work until 6:00.
I can't believe you're still filling
in for your dad's old sign girl.
Yeah, you know, I'm just
what kind of counseling I'm going to do.
Okay, Al, it's show
time. Let's see it already.
The decorator just put the
finishing touches on it yesterday.
After you!
Oh, my God.
- Sorry.
- That's okay.
Whoa!
Oh, my God.
- You have outdone yourself.
This is impressive. I thought you
were gonna have, like, a fish tank.
Look at the nipples on this
guy.
Oh, my God, we're going
to be so popular, Savannah.
That is the VIP section.
We can come any night of the week
and have our own special space.
It is so sexy. I love that we get to
be VIP! Okay, girls, getting ready...
- Let's get this party started.
- My God... No!
Last one, grab your penis.
- Thank you.
Turn them on like this.
I love it.
Hey, no, look, my balls won't light up.
Oh, my God,
that hat is too much.
I mean it truly is the
tiniest hat I've ever seen.
It is, it's like suitable for a mouse.
- You need to wear it to your wedding.
- I can't, I have a veil.
Okay, games, games, games, games.
All right, the way this game works
is you write a caption
for what you think
the woman in this scene
is saying to her husband.
But here is the thing...
Look, look, look.
Look, look. Yes, you
have to make it dirty.
It'll be fun, it'll be
fun, so, all right. Ready?
Set, go.
All right, stop.
Stop, stop, stop, pencils
down. I will go first.
He said he had a package for me.
All right, Danielle, you go.
I love getting mail.
But I spelled it m-a-I-e.
Oh, wow.
It's perfect. All right,
Meg, Meg, Meg, you go.
All right. So, I wrote...
Hi, Matt, this is to certify that
this is the big fat cock I ordered.
Wait, why would you
put Matt's name in it?
Well, this is supposed
to be about you, right?
No, they're about marriage,
they're not about my marriage.
Right, but it's a joke,
like everyone else's.
Well, it's not like everybody else's.
It was a joke. It wasn't
a prediction. You know.
A joke.
And why would you tweak
the nipples on the Buddha?
That seemed, like, disrespectful.
Disrespectful to who? To you?
Did you convert to Buddhism?
No, that's disgusting. I'm not Buddhist.
It's... That's Buddha. That's Buddha!
Right, right. But you know that
was a joke about nipples. Right?
And not Buddhism.
lot of people, but that is...
This is a party, so let's
Okay, yeah, no, forgotten.
Um, I mean, we
can do another one of these.
Yes.
So this lady has a
plunger and there's a butt crack.
Hey.
Hey, sleepy head. Good morning.
Oh, wow.
I shot these on Tuesday.
They were such an amazing couple.
They were so open to all of my ideas.
Great. Where is that?
Over in Seattle. We had to
go near the shipyards though
so we could get something
a little more edgy.
'Cause I mean, look at that wall.
Yeah.
Hey, weren't you supposed to go
to that career counselor today?
Yeah.
Yeah? You should...
Yeah. Yeah, okay. I'll go get ready.
Good.
Hello, is somebody there?
It's me, you don't have to come out.
What's this?
What's what? I'm just
gonna watch some TV.
Megan, I don't think
I like this new habit.
I spoke with Anthony,
and he said you were meeting
with the career counselor today.
My God, I know exactly
what she's going to say.
It's just a waste of time.
Megan, honey, I don't want to
see you throw away your education.
You have an advanced degree.
- I know.
never given you that
stupid job because now...
Is that my girl?
Hey, what are you doing home?
It's his home.
Taking the day off.
- Yeah, me too. Hmm.
- Wanna stay for dinner?
- Yeah.
- Ed.
Hey, is it "make your own pizza" night?
- Sure, great idea. Great idea.
- Yeah.
I promise to love you,
to cherish you and to hold you
and to be the rock in our
relationship for the rest of our days.
I promise to be your baby's
breath when we wake each morning.
And to be your evening rose
at day's end.
And I promise
to be your safe harbor
when the boat is rocking
and when it's not rocking.
I give you the bride and the
groom, Mr. and Mrs. Wanamaker!
And here they are
dancing to the song Mrs. Wannamaker has
picked for their first dance together
as man and wife.
My dad used to make yipping sounds
when I first started to take you out
because he said it was puppy love.
I know. I remember.
Yeah, well, you know,
but it wasn't puppy love.
No... I mean, unless we stayed
puppies for a seriously long time.
- Listen...
- What?
Look...
I know it's taken me a
really long time to get here.
What are you talking about?
Okay, well, you know how I took
that guy's seminar last month?
- Right.
- Well, I took a personality test.
And the test came back
and the type that I am...
- Is a procrastinator.
- Anth, I mean...
Who makes up those tests? Come on.
- Experts.
- Right.
But that's not important.
What's important is that
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"Laggies" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 22 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/laggies_12173>.
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