Legion

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Catch.

Catch.

Damien.

I have dreams...

... of a rose...

... and of falling down

a long flight of steps.

"A light shall shine upon this day,

for the Lord has been born unto us.

And he is called Wonderful.

God. The Prince of Peace."

Dockside Hunter, sweep completed.

Negative finding.

Roger, River. Repeat, acknowledge.

"Peace, I give you.

My peace, I leave you.

As the world gives, do I give to you.

Let not your heart be troubled."

Proceeding northeast,

approximate location near...

"The Lord is my light and my salvation.

Whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the defender of my life."

- How did I do on my theology quiz?

- Change your name to Rajneesh.

- Really?

- "God is like a power mower"?

No kidding.

- Father, everything's relative.

- Is it?

- Or, maybe not.

- I like a man who knows his mind.

Well, that's it. I gotta go now.

I'm driving to Philly.

- Speed kills.

- Who's to say?

Not me.

Father, you mentioned a Damien Karras

in your prayer for the dead.

Yes, I did.

Isn't he the one who died

in a fall on those steps?

Yes. 15 years ago today.

- I hear...

- Get lost, will you?

All right, all right. I am in flight.

There's more potatoes.

Could you pass the salt? Thank you.

Joey, what did you say

that offended Tom Lowery?

- He's our biggest benefactor.

- Oh, yes.

What did you say to him?

"Jesus loves you. Everyone else

thinks you're an a**hole."

- Good morning, John.

- My back aches.

- Do we have to have our own Olympics?

- Any plans today?

- I'm watching It's a Wonderful Life.

- Very nice.

- Seen it 37 times.

- That's commendable.

- Do you have a favorite picture?

- The Fly.

- You going alone or with keepers?

- With Bill Kinderman.

- The cop?

- Yeah.

Every year on this day he gets

depressed, so I try to cheer him up.

I can't believe you said that.

What kind of world is this?

Are you an animal?

Do you know what Macbeth is about?

It's a play about the numbing

of the moral sense.

I tell Ryan we have nothing to go on.

He says, "Win some, lose some."

You're a racist. Did you know that?

The police exam asks, "What are rabies

and what do you do for them?"

Ryan said,

"Rabies are Jewish priests...

...and I would do anything

I could for them."

- What was the murder weapon, Stedman?

- I'd be guessing.

If not us, who? If not now, when?

All right. Something like

garden shears, maybe.

- We're abandoned.

- I didn't get you.

I was signaling beings on Mars.

Sometimes they answer.

Funny.

Are you enjoying your luxury cruise

aboard the Patna, Lord Jim?

Telex Richmond right away and urgently

for the file on the Gemini Killer.

- The Gemini Killer's dead.

- Who was speaking to you?

- He's dead.

- He should live so long.

- The autopsy? When, please?

- Tomorrow.

And tomorrow, and tomorrow.

I am leaving you. Ryan, Stedman,

go home. Go home to your families.

Talk about wops.

- Starving?

- Not really. Just some coffee.

- You've been up since 5:00 a.m.

- I have this.

- How was Virginia?

- Neat. We stopped at a diner.

Instead of potatoes,

they served Mama grits.

So she says, "These Jews are crazy."

They're all wackos.

Next, they'll wanna eat papaya.

- My God.

- How was your day?

Our trackers at long last brought in

Mushkin, the Georgetown terrorist...

...who breaks into people's homes

and completely redecorates.

- You okay, Bill?

- Hi, Daddy.

- And goodbye?

- Off to dance class.

- Pocahontas with the hair.

- Watch out for red shoes.

- You're home now.

- No, I gotta go cheer up Father Dyer.

What are you doing out here? Founding

an order called "Lurking Fathers"?

I've been out there for centuries.

Four new popes have been elected.

Official business.

All right. So I'm late.

So I know it. So I'm sorry. I got...

- Want butter on it?

- No. And can I have two Cokes?

- Medium or large?

- Medium.

- What's this?

- I need lemon drops.

- We'll be late.

- I used to hear children's confessions.

Now I'm a lemon drop junkie.

The weirdoes breathe it on you

along with pot, it's addictive.

Now I suppose you have all sorts

of rosary biz and the like.

No, no. Loose as a goose.

Maybe you should go home and rest.

- I can't go home.

- Why?

- The carp.

- You know, I thought you said...

My wife's mother is visiting, Father.

Tuesday night, she's cooking a carp.

It's a tasty fish.

I have nothing against it.

But because it's supposedly filled

with impurities, she buys it live.

And for three days it's been...

...swimming up and down in my bathtub.

Up...

...and down.

And I hate it.

I can't stand the sight of it.

Moving its gills.

You're standing very close to me.

Have you noticed?

Yes. I haven't had a bath

for three days.

I can't go home

until the carp is asleep.

Because if I see it swimming,

I'll kill it.

- And a salad.

- Okay.

The whole world is

a homicide victim, Father.

Would a God who is good

invent something like death?

Plainly speaking, it's a lousy idea.

Not popular.

- You're blaming God.

- Who should I blame?

- You don't want to live forever.

- I do.

- You'd get bored.

- I have hobbies.

In the meantime, we have cancer

and mongoloid babies and murderers...

...monsters prowling the planet.

Even prowling this neighborhood.

Right now, all our children suffer...

...and our loved ones die.

And your God goes waltzing

blithely through the universe...

...like some kind of

cosmic Billie Burke.

- Bill, it all works out right.

- When?

- At the end of time.

- That soon?

No, we're gonna be there. We're gonna

live forever. We're spirits.

How I would love to believe that.

It's that kid that got killed.

I heard it on the news.

You wanna talk about it?

You knew him.

A little bit. Police Boys Club.

His name was Thomas. Thomas Kintry.

Black boy, about 12 years old.

The killer...

...drove an ingot

into each of his eyes...

...then cut off his head.

Is this okay, Father?

I can get you something else.

Some more coffee?

In place of his head was the head

from a statue of Christ...

...all done up in blackface,

like a minstrel show.

The eyes and the mouth painted white.

Mr. Bones.

The boy had been crucified...

...on a pair of rowing oars.

May the Lord be in your heart

and help you to confess your sins.

- Yes?

- I have...

...a scrupulous conscience, Father.

This need to confess...

...so many things.

If I step on two straws

in the shape of a cross...

...I feel that I have to confess it.

- It torments me.

- Try to make a good confession.

And remember, Christ forgives us

all of our sins.

Only little things. Nothing.

Seventeen of them, Father.

The first was that waitress

near Candlestick Park.

I cut her throat

and watched her bleed.

She bled a great deal.

It's a problem

that I'm working on, Father.

All this bleeding.

I don't know. I don't know.

He was such a good...

- I've been thinking...

- This is new.

Do we need prints from inside?

All you'll get are the priest's.

Yes, I know.

- Then what's the point?

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