Look Who's Talking Too

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Whoa, Wilbur! Here I go!

I'm running pretty good now.

I'm gonna jump.

Oh, I got wings and I'm flying!

TriStar Pictures,

where anything can happen.

Is your diaphragm in?

Okay, now let me see

if I got this straight.

Santa Claus is real,

but ghosts aren't real.

Cowboys are real,

but witches aren't real.

Dinosaurs aren't real,

and monsters used to be real.

Or was it the other way around?

I gotta listen more.

Because it's dark doesn't mean monsters

are coming out. These are my toys.

The same toys that...

I don't remember it having batteries,

but I'm sure that it's fine.

I'm sure that there's a...

Oh, oh.

Oh, my God!

Monsters!

There's monsters in my room!

Maybe I should get

under the covers now.

- I have to get that.

- He'll stop.

- No, he won't stop.

- All right.

- Help! Monsters!

- I'll do it.

No, don't read

your accounting magazines.

- Why not?

- It gets you out of the mood.

Monsters! Monsters!

You behave.

Okay, Mike, I'm coming.

- Monsters!

- Monsters?

There's no monsters.

See? Do you see any monsters?

Well, yeah.

It was Popeye.

Yeah, he was the one.

I'll take that Gumby and I'll knock

him from here to kingdom come.

I think my daddy likes these toys

more than I do.

Who else? Pee-wee? No.

I wonder if he'll do

the flying turd gag now.

Watch out, Mikey, it's a flying turd!

- Go to bed.

- You're crazy.

- Good night, honey.

- Good night. I'll tuck myself in.

- Is that good?

- Why did I call you in here?

Oh, come on, Mollie!

I told you not to read this.

Now get up. Get up, honey.

- Oh, I can't.

- Why?

I got him to go to sleep. We never

get to do it anymore. Please?

Please get up, honey.

- I'm sleeping.

- I know.

You wouldn't have any fun doing it

while I'm sleeping.

Well, it's never stopped us before.

Hey, what's going on out there?

Am I hearing things?

Is somebody there?

- I know where to go, stick with me.

- Yeah, bright idea. Now we're lost.

- Let's go where they're going.

- I been there.

Who is it? Who is it?

What do you want? Go away!

Tail, don't fail me now.

- We're the guys. We're the winners.

- I think I can.

Come on. Let's go. Let's go.

We're in. We're making it.

We're doing it!

Come on, let's go. Keep going.

Keep moving, guys. Please.

- I don't think I can.

- As long as one of us do.

Come on, buddy, help me out.

Oh, no! It's the tadpole squad.

You can't bully me.

You can't get through this diaphragm!

Guys, I found a way through!

Over here by the rim.

Come on, follow me!

Yes!

Hey, buster, how'd you get in here?

This is my womb.

- Get out of here!

- Here we go.

- You know why I'm here.

- Stop that!

- Give it up.

- Stop doing that!

Let me in, baby. Let me in.

Come on, mama. Come on, hot mama.

You're a hot mama!

Hot mama!

Yes! Yes!

Well, here I am.

All conceived and nowhere to go.

You missed. Go wide!

Look out! Missed him.

Hi, honey.

Hi, babe.

Hi, honey.

- What'd you get for me?

- This isn't for you.

This is for you. It is a...

- Don't you think he's a little young?

- That hat's never gonna fit me.

- You tell him.

- I'm not telling him about it.

- You're the guy.

- Forget it.

No. When we have a girl,

I will explain it to her.

Oh, brother!

All right. Here goes.

Mike, this is a potty, okay? When

you want to take a piss you do it...

Don't say piss.

When you want to take

a whiz, you do...

See a man about a horse?

Drain the snake? What do I say?

Pee pee.

- Pee pee's a wimp word.

- No, pee pee is easy for him to say.

When you want to take a pee pee,

you do it in here.

And you do this.

You take it out, okay?

- Oh, come on.

- What?

Dad, who's kidding who?

In the same token,

when you take a dump...

Poo poo.

This is a joke, right?

I know it sounds disgusting,

but you gotta trust me on this, okay?

You want me to take a dump

outside my diaper?

- He doesn't like it.

- He does too.

- He doesn't like it.

- We just have to make it fun for him.

Come along and be my potty boy

Come along and be my potty boy

Is this an appropriate subject

for a musical?

And you can potty too

Yes, you

My girl likes to potty all the time

Potty all the time

You got to fight for your right

To potty

You got to fight for your right

To potty

- He doesn't like it.

- He likes it.

I don't care. I ain't pooping

in that thing. I got my standards.

- Your keys!

- Toss them.

Yo, thanks, babe.

- Do you believe?

- You were lucky with the keys.

I was starting to think

I could really love Brad.

Then I noticed this face he made.

Kind of like...

If I said, "What do you want

to do?", there'd be this face.

Or, "How'd you like that movie?"

It's just this face that says:

"I don't know. What do you want?"

Then I had this flash of having kids

and the kids making that face.

And then I knew it was over.

You are deranged.

You know that, don't you?

You know what? If you want a boy,

you eat more sodium-rich food.

- Lf you want a girl, eat more dairy.

- Really? Who says?

- I read it.

- In the The National Enquirer?

I think The Star.

If you have a preference, act now.

Those sex organs are forming soon.

Let's see, two arms, two legs

and two mouths?

D and what comes up? Dog.

Yeah, yeah. I know all about

computers. Scoot over, girls.

I got a lot of work to do here.

Let's see. I'll just try this one.

And let's see.

What do we get? A jar.

Beautiful. I'm good at this.

I ought to get a job here.

- What are you girls up to?

- Nothing!

What's going on in here?

- I'm getting a funny feeling.

- So this is how grownups get so tall.

We were just finishing up

the Margolis account here.

The Margolis account, huh?

You're gonna send Margolis

a spreadsheet with pictures?

- Tickle, tickle, tickle.

- Something funny is going on here.

What's that?

What's up, my man?

- It looks like a kid.

- It looks like a kid.

I can see that! What is he

doing here? This is not a nursery!

This is the first time I've done this.

It was an emergency.

It was an emergency.

I see what you're up to.

You have a son and you're pregnant,

so you get special consideration.

No, I would never ask

for special consideration.

Let me tell you something.

Accountancy is filled with hardship.

It's sacrifice.

If you wanted something easy...

...why didn't you become a dental

hygienist or a car rental person?

When I had a bleeding ulcer

and I came out of the anaesthetic...

Somebody's loud and opinionated.

Boy!

No. The first thing I said was:

"Where's my adding machine? Where's

my calculator?" That's what I said!

And let me tell you something else.

Here, shoes, have a drink.

You mess with my mother,

you mess with me.

So how did you arrive

at this figure for your tips?

I guessed.

You kept track for a period of time

and did a projected estimate.

I made it up.

You made it up?

Now, as a flight instructor

you earned...

...$9212?

Really? Hey, that's pretty good.

- You realize that that's only...

- 177.

177 dollars a week.

- It's not my main job.

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