Man's Favorite Sport? Page #10
- APPROVED
- Year:
- 1964
- 120 min
- 296 Views
Well, for Pete's sake, why didn't
you just come right out and say it?
I just did. Well, you said,
"strangely attractive."
That's something you say to the bearded
lady at the circus. All right, Abigail.
There are times
when I like you.
Is this one of them? I guess
it must be, because right now...
Right now I'm wondering what it
would be like if I kissed you.
You're wondering?
Yeah.
Well, for Pete's sake,
don't just stand there.
I mean, do something.
I mean, don't just stand there.
Are you gonna do it or not? Uh, I go
out of my mind... Will you shut up?
Ooh.
Mmm. Well, no!
What's the matter?
What?
That wasn't any good.
What wasn't any good?
That kiss.
What? The kiss wasn't any good.
Well, I'm sorry, Roger, but you shouldn't
waste your time if you want to kiss me again...
Of all the nerve. Because
it won't ever work out.
Because I'll always look
at you as a friend. Yeah.
Even though you can't kiss,
it doesn't make any difference.
I just am sorry, but what
else am I gonna say? Oh, hell!
I wasn't finished, Roger.
I had a few other...
Oh, got it
snarled again.
Ow!
Oh, uh... Uh...
Uh... Better pull him up
on the bank.
- Roger, look behind you!
- I will in a minute!
Roger, you dope.! Would you
please look where you're going.!
Come on, you! Get out of there! Come on!
Ooh.
Go on.!
Get going.!
Hey, Roger, hurry up!
You've got a fish, a big one!
- Well, you get him!
- I can't! It's against the rules! Come on!
No, no, no!
Roger, get the net!
Oh!
Oh, Roger!
Oh, that's a beauty!
A real big one!
Oh, I bet nobody...
Jeepers.
What's the matter with you? Oh, my
goodness! I never thought it'd happen.
You're liable to win
this tournament. Probably.
Then what?
And then what? Than I'll write a
new book on how to catch a fish.
You know how you do it? You sit on
a log and turn your back to the fish.
Or you climb up a tree
and fall on it.
Or you drag it up on shore until
a bear tells you that's far enough.
That's a fine way to catch fish. Yeah.
Well, it's all my fault.
I got you into this mess.
Well, at least I don't
have to catch any more.
What do you mean by that?
I mean the tournament's over.
After I turn this one in, I
don't want to see another fish.
No, I suppose you don't.
Suppose you don't.
I'll see you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah?
- Willoughby?
Yes? This is Cadwalader. Well, boy,
I always knew you had it in you.
Mr. Bagley just came in
with the final score.
You are now officially the winner
of the Wakapoogee tournament.
Willoughby?
Do you hear me?
Yes, Mr. Cadwalader,
I heard you.
Why don't you come over here now and
have a drink with us and celebrate?
Yes. Willoughby, are you...
Unpredictable fellow,
that Willoughby.
Real genius.
Something's wrong with him.
Celebrate.
Who is it?
Roger, it's me, Abby.
Come on in.
I have to talk to you.
I don't feel
like talking, Abby.
I know, but I've got something
I have to tell you.
I know you're not gonna like
it, and I don't like saying it.
Abigail... But if you'll
just let me say it,
then I'll go away and won't
bother you any more. Abigail...
Now let me finish, please. Actually,
there are two things I have to say.
The first is that this has all
been my fault and I'm sorry.
I'm very sorry. Because
I won the tournament?
That's the second thing
I have to say.
You can't take that trophy.
You just can't take it.
Abigail... Now, please let me
finish. You can't take that.
You've got to tell them the
truth. Do you know what'll happen?
I know it'll mean you'll lose your job and
your customers, but you've got to do that.
Once you start fooling people, you have to
go on and keep on fooling them and, and...
you're too nice a guy
to be a phony...
and keep on
being a phony.
Now, that's all I'm gonna say.
If you'll...
Just go ahead and do that.
I just couldn't tell her
It's funny.
Hi. Congratulations. Thanks.
Well, Willoughby.
Here's the champion.
What'll you have, Willoughby?
Make it something expensive.
Skaggs is buying.
Not for you.
I'm buying this one, gentlemen.
Before we have anything to drink,
I'd like to tell you something.
Yeah? What is it?
Excuse me just a minute.
Mr. Bagley, would you mind
coming over here for a minute?
I'd be glad to.
I'd like you to hear this.
All right. There's the
trophy, all shined up for you.
Yeah, that's just what I want to talk
to you about. That trophy isn't mine.
What? What? You're the winner.
Major Phipps is the winner. You're
off your rocker. I didn't win.
- Yes, you did, Major.
- Phipps didn't win.
I told you that. Willoughby, you
haven't been drinking, have you?
Not enough to make any
difference. And you feel all right?
Yes. Willoughby, I
weighed those fish myself.
Gentlemen, please,
let me talk. I saw it.
L- I-I...
I owe you an explanation.
L... I want to apologize.
You all took it for granted that
I knew all there was about fishing.
L- I-I wrote a book on it.
I must be a fisherman. Yeah.
Up until this tournament, I've
never been fishing in my life.
Are you telling
the truth?
Yes, I am. Then,
Willoughby, you must be a...
Fraud. That's probably the
word you're looking for.
Maybe a phony too.
And maybe you're right.
I never said I was a fisherman,
did I? No, you didn't.
I guess he didn't. I
only told you how to fish.
And you told it good. What about the
three fish you won the tournament with?
Well, now... Yeah! You didn't
catch them out of a book!
That was dumb luck.
It was a sheer accident.
No relation to fishing
as you all know it.
But you caught them. Oh,
yeah. One of them caught me.
The second one committed suicide
while my line was hung over a branch.
hooked that one, all right.
Then why are you
disqualifying?
Isn't there something in the rules that
says a fisherman can't get any outside help?
Yes, there is.
From any living source.
This one was living, all right.
I got help from a bear.
Which disqualifies me.
Look, fellas, I didn't earn
Well, by George. This
never happened before.
Willoughby, I'm stunned.
Completely stunned.
You're fired, of
course. I expected to be.
Congratulations, Major.
Thank you.
Good night, gentlemen.
Good night, Willoughby.
Well? Well, I don't know what to say.
Well, don't fall on your
sword about it. What?
That's a joke, son. Hell,
I just won a tournament!
I don't feel much like
celebrating, but I'll try.
Make mine a triple... because
I understand you're buying.
Good company, isn't he?
Easy, I thought
you were never coming.
You wanted to see me? The desk
clerk told me that you asked...
That was a half an hour ago.
I was beginning to wonder...
if you'd disappeared
off the face of the earth too.
Who's disappeared?
Abigail!
I looked all over the
place for her. Where is she?
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"Man's Favorite Sport?" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 30 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/man's_favorite_sport_13293>.
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