Man's Favorite Sport? Page #8

In there.

Well, Roger!

Look, I didn't have

anything to do... You didn't?

She took a sleeping pill. I slept on

the floor. Very romantic. What a pity.

Don't you believe me? Sure. But

I better get her out of here.

First help me outta this thing. I think

the zipper's jammed. All right. Let's see.

I can't seem to... Wait a

minute. It is stuck, isn't it?

I'm trying to find Mr. Roger

Willoughby. He's in cabin number five.

Yes, ma'am. That's right

over there. Thank you kindly.

Ow.! Don't be so rough.

Hold still.

It's not my fault

that the zipper is stuck.

I didn't say it was your fault. I

just wanna get out of this. Okay.

Put your hands up top here.

Hold on and I'll pull.

Well, I'll try, but...

Good morning.

Why, Tex! Uh, I didn't

expect to see you.

Obviously.

Didn't you get my message?

No, uh, I didn't. I reckon

you didn't. Uh, who's this?

Oh, this is Miss, um...

Mueller.

And Miss... I guess you're

gettin' awfully mixed-up, Roger.

Connors. So, you're

Easy? How do you do? Yeah.

His zipper got stuck... Tex, if you're

wondering what I'm doing in this...

What could you be doing in a

thing like that? I slept in it.

Why? What do you mean, why?

It seems a funny thing to do. Don't

they have beds in these cabins?

Of course they have. I was trying

out some new equipment. New equipment?

Yes, for the store. And Miss Mueller

happened to come by and find you?

Exactly.

Isn't that nice?

And, uh, she was helping

you with your zipper?

It was stuck before.

Good morning. Willoughby,

do you know what time it is?

You have less than ten minutes

before starting time. Yes, I'm sorry.

I'll get dressed right away. Before

y'all start, may I use your bedroom?

Oh, no, Tex! I feel all dusty,

and I'd like to freshen up.

But Easy can take you

over to the lodge.

I'll be glad to show

you. Thank you very much.

Roger, I'll see...

Good morning, everyone.

Roger, is this some of the

equipment you're tryin' out?

I hope the story...

Tex,

she came in last night just

to borrow a sleeping pill.

There's no use explaining.

She's never gonna believe you.

I certainly won't

believe you. Good-bye!

Uh, but, Tex!

Just a minute, Miss Connors.

Don't do anything foolish.

Just be thankful that Willoughby has sown

his wild oats before you were married.

Now he's got them all out of his

system. Haven't you, Willoughby?

I did not sow any wild oats!

Then what were you doing...

You mean that zipper was really stuck, and

all she wanted was a sleeping pill? Ohh!

Wait! Tex, please. You gotta listen to

me. There's a perfectly simple explanation.

I don't wanna hear it.

That's not fair. You've got...

Hey, only got five more minutes. All the

other fishermen will be wearing pants.

Tex, I've gotta go

or I'm gonna lose my job.

You got to wait until tonight so I can

explain everything. Will you do that?

Do you really think you can

explain? I can if you'll listen.

All right.

Good.

I don't know why,

but I'll be here.

I'll call you. It'll be

sometime after 6:00. Okay.

Willoughby, I don't mind your having fun,

but remember, you're representing the store.

Mr. Cadwalader, I've taken

just about all I'm gonna take.

I don't think you're concentrating

on this tournament! Shut up.

Very well, Willoughby.

Roger, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make all

this trouble. Everything you do makes trouble.

I just fell asleep! That's why I was in

your bed. Why come out and act as though...

As though what? Make

Tex think what she did?

Wasn't she mad? She was about

the maddest woman I've ever seen.

Is this here some new equipment

that you are trying out?

Well, I do not believe it!

Don't hit me, Roger.

I'm going in there and get dressed. If

you're still here by the time I come out...

Willoughby.!

Yes, I'm coming!

You've got three minutes.

Mm-hmm. Okay. Good. Bye.

Gentlemen, welcome to the 36th

annual Wakapoogee fishing tournament.

Printed copies of the rules have

been made available to all of you,

but I'm gonna run over them again

in case some of you missed a few.

There'll be

three days fishing.

Your best fish of each day

will count in your total points.

The tournament day will start

at the sound of this bell.

All fish must be

weighed in by sundown.

Are there

any questions?

In that event, gentlemen, the

best of luck to all of you.

Well, Willoughby, I see you

decided to wear pants after all.

Yeah. The fish might have gone

for those polka-dot pajamas.

Well, here we go. May the

best man win. Good luck, Major.

He'll need it. I'm gonna beat

you because I've got his book.

10:
00, 11:00, 9:00. The

man with this book wins.

Well, come along. Come along,

Napoleon. This way to Waterloo.

You just read the book.

He wrote it.

Ah. "Fish are

likely to be found...

about 20 yards

from the shore."

"When casting, always aim the

hook at one particular spot."

Ow!

Oh.

Oh.

Read this book...

Fishing reel.

Now...

Oh.

Come back here.

And to think they call

this... fishing "fun."

I suppose you saw the

whole thing. Amazing.

Absolutely amazing. Not even

Confucius could comment on what I saw.

Now you want five dollars

not to tell people about it?

No, no, no. This one's on the

house. Nobody'd believe it.

That's quite a fish you caught. Yeah.

Take a real big one

to beat you today.

White man turning blue. White man

need fire inside, make white man warm.

When red man talk like that,

white man knows something's coming.

All right, go ahead.

Want a drink?

What is it?

Old Indian drink, formerly made from

moose blood 'til we ran out of moose.

What's in it now? Low cholesterol

tribal herbs, safflower oil,

a little alcohol,

120 proof. Very good.

How much?

Five dollars.

For one drink? Ha! One drink,

whole bottle. Five dollar minimum.

As the great Chief

Confucius... Never mind.

Too cold.

Ah!

Pretty good.

Roger Willoughby,

five pounds, eight ounces.

I got you beat! That's

a nice fish, Willoughby,

but Major Phipps leads you

by three ounces.

You mean the Major and I... Sure.

We're ahead of the whole bunch.

Unless somebody else comes in

with a bigger one real soon.

Never thought

I'd beat you.

Well, Major, you're one of the

few people that can say that.

I just went by your book.

That's all. Good. Keep it up.

Told you, Skaggs. The man

with the book wins. Yeah.

How much did that little

sardine you caught weigh?

Never mind. I'll pay

you the $50 I owe you...

if you'll stop talking about

it. Why don't you pay me now?

Hello?

Hello.

Oh, hello, Roger. How'd

y'all do in the tournament?

Pretty well.

I got a big one.

I'm in second place.

Well, good for you.

Hey, you don't sound

as mad as you were.

Well, it could be

I cooled off a bit.

When I thought about it, it

just didn't seem quite like you.

Just how did you mean that?

Not like you think.

All right. I'll come by

and pick you up.

Oh, Roger, I'm just

putting on my dress.

Why don't you go to the lodge,

and I'll meet you there, okay?

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