Man's Favorite Sport? Page #9

All right. Hurry up. Okay. Bye.

We hear you are second in the

tournament, Mr. Willoughby.

Yeah, I was lucky. Would

you like a drink out here?

Yes, thank you very much.

I'd like that.

Vodka martini

on the rocks.

- Make it two of'em.

- Yes, sir.

Oh, congratulations, Roger.

You had a great day.

Or is that the usual?

The unusual.

Keep it up.

I'm betting on you.

Oh, Roger, we are so proud

of you! We're all excited!

Abby just couldn't believe

it. You know what she said? No.

She said, "I knew

Roger could do it." Hmm?

Well, she said it.

Doesn't sound like her.

Oh, are you still

mad at her? Why?

Because of what

she said to Tex.

You speak as though Abby

meant to make trouble.

Trouble? That girl

is a walking disaster.

Every time I'm near her,

something awful happens.

Is that why you,

why you kissed her?

What? When?

Last night.

She asked me to. She doesn't

know what she's doing. She did?

Oh, Roger, do you always know

what you're doing? Of course I do!

And last night

you kissed her.

Well, I'd hardly

call it a kiss.

That's what Abby said,

but you did kiss her.

Yes, I did! You see, that's a beginning.

Oh, uh, two drinks.

Are you expecting somebody?

Is Tex coming?

Yes, she is.

Well, then I better

make it quick.

We were talking about...

You kissed Abby.

And I say this is some kind of a

beginning, isn't it? Beginning? Of what?

Don't you know what

psychiatrists say? No.

The love impulse,

Love impulse!

Especially in a male, shows

itself first in conflict.

That's probably why Abby

and you fight all the time.

What? Are you nuts?

You're as crazy as she is!

But, Roger, after all

we have done for you!

And Abby worked so hard

to teach you how to...

You catch one fish, and now

you start talking like this!

Oh, it just makes me mad!

Uh, Easy, wait.

Roger, I don't want

to talk to you. I'm mad!

Don't turn around! Just stand

still. Take off your hands!

What's the matter with you?

Feel the back of your dress.

What?

Your dress.

Oh, Roger, did you do that?

Of course I didn't do it. You must

have caught it on the back of the chair.

Well, do something about it,

but don't go away. I won't.

We've got to get out of

here. We'll just walk.

Okay. Right. Now, start

with your right foot. Ready?

Willoughby! I want

to tell you something.

Willoughby!

Ah, there, Willoughby,

I've been looking for you.

I'll be with you

in a minute, Cadwalader.

I'm afraid that boy's

in trouble again.

Phew! I thought we'd never get

out of there. Let me have a look.

I can't see here.

Let's go to the light.

Better hurry up.

Somebody's liable to come along.

Roger, I think

this thing is stuck.

Do you think you can

fix it? Yeah, let me try.

Roger, you better hurry.

I think... I am hurrying!

Roger, somebody is coming! Oh, my tie!

Wait a minute!

As soon as we get to...

Well, Roger, just how

do you explain this?

Well, Tex, I... Every time I see you,

you're up to your neck in zippers.

It was an accident. My...

She sat in a wicker chair...

And you just got your tie

caught in her zipper.

I tell you,

it was an accident.

I don't want to marry a man who

has as many accidents as you do.!

Good-bye, Roger!

And don't bother to call me.

Get this tie

out of here.

Uh, I... I...

You...

fish!

Major Phipps, four pounds,

three ounces. Good, good, good.

Congratulations, Major.

That's high for the day so far.

All right, dig in your pocket,

Skaggs. Come on. Pay up!

I'll give you the $50, but if you

mention that book, I'll make you eat it.

What about, Willoughby?

What did he do?

He hasn't checked in yet.

There's still 20 minutes left.

You still think you can

beat him? I led yesterday.

You want to bet on today?

Sure, I do. Certainly.

All right, between you and Willoughby,

I'll bet... Here comes Willoughby now.

What kind ofluck

did you have, Willoughby?

Oh, just fair.

Hey!

Wow! Fair, he said.

You still want to bet?

Roger Willoughby,

four pounds, eight ounces.

Congratulations, Willoughby! Fine work.

You two are

out in front again.

Only, Willoughby, now you lead the

major by... what is it... three or two.

Two ounces.

I'm sorry, Major.

Don't be ridiculous.

I'm tickled to be that close.

Two ounces isn't much of a lead.

I might make it up tomorrow.

You might just do that.

I'll see you.

You want to bet on

tomorrow? Against Willoughby?

What for? I make

enough money off you.

Hi there.

Hmm.

Well, now, that is

an enthusiastic greeting.

I was gonna ask you a question.

I think I'll ask anyway.

Did you ever dream that on the

second day of the tournament,

you'd be in first?

Now that's

an intelligent question.

I thought you'd say

something like that.

How did you

catch that fish?

You didn't tell me about the

first one. How'd you get this one?

I was climbing up a tree... Oh, please,

don't give me that stuff about the bird.

You're not gonna answer me, are you? No.

Why? What's the matter, Roger? Nothing.

Let me have another drink. Oh, no,

thanks. I don't really care for one.

You're sure? Positive. Is it Tex?

You couldn't convince her,

could you? Not in two words.

What? What two words? "Hello, Tex."

Then she hung up.

Did you call her back?

Four times. "Hello, Tex."

Hang up. "Hello, Tex."

I couldn't get past "Hello, Tex."

Now she's gonna have to call me.

Oh, she will. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Yes, sir, she'll make up

some kind of an excuse.

"Roger, did you all leave your

cigarette lighter in my apartment?

Oh, you didn't? Well, I guess it was

some other gentleman caller then."

She'll make you

call her back somehow.

She's gonna have to wait

a long time.

How many drinks

have you had, Roger?

Confucius say, "Woman who stick

nose in other people's drink...

is liable

to get it punched."

Confucius also say that fisherman who

have too many martinis only catch olive.

I suppose you're right.

Let me have a check, please.

Come on.

I'll walk you home.

I hate domineering females.

I'll walk you home.

Okay.

Roger?

Hmm?

You know last night when

Easy's dress came unzipped?

Did you tell her that

you thought I was crazy?

Yes, I did.

I was kind of upset by the

way everything was happening.

Mm-hmm. Well, it's all

right. I don't mind.

After all the trouble

I've made for you,

I don't blame you

if you don't like me.

Oh, it isn't I don't

like you, Abigail.

Matter of fact, there are

times... What kind of times?

Times when I find you...

strangely attractive.

"Strangely attractive?"

What do you mean?

What's "strangely attractive?"

Well, like a bird

watching a snake.

Now I'm a snake. That's good.

Go right in there and...

I didn't mean it like that. I

mean it's... kind of a fascination.

I never know what you're

gonna do next. Oh, yeah?

It's like living on the

slopes of a live volcano.

Oh, well, I like being a live

volcano better than being a snake!

That's a pretty good line,

Roger. I mean you're exciting.

Oh, Roger, you mean there are

times when you like me? Yes!

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