Mickey's Christmas Carol

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Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas to one and all.

Give a penny for the poor, governor.

Penny for the poor.

My partner, Jacob Marley,

dead seven years today.

He was a good one.

He robbed from the widows

and swindled the poor.

In his will, he left me enough money

to pay for his tombstone.

And I had him buried at sea.

Good morning, Mr. Scrooge.

Cratchit, what are you doing

with that piece of coal?

I was just trying to thaw out the ink.

You used a piece last week.

Now, get on with your work, Cratchit.

Speaking of work, Mr. Scrooge,

tomorrow is Christmas,

and I was wondering

if I could have half a day off.

Christmas, huh?

I suppose so.

But I'll dock you half a day's pay.

Now, let's see,

I pay you two shillings a day.

Two shillings and a halfpenny, sir?

Oh, yes. I gave you that raise

three years ago.

Yes, sir,

when I started doing your laundry.

All right, Cratchit,

get busy while I go over my books.

Oh, and here.

Here's another bundle of shirts for you.

Yes, sir.

Let's see now, 50 pounds,

10 shillings from McDuff.

Plus his 80 percent interest

compounded daily.

Money, money, money.

Merry Christmas.

And a merry Christmas to you,

Master Fred.

Bah, humbug.

Merry Christmas, Uncle Scrooge.

What's so merry about it?

I'll tell you what Christmas is,

it's just another workday.

And any jackanapes who thinks else

should be boiled in his own pudding.

But, sir, Christmas is a time for giving.

A time to be with one's family.

I say, bah, humbug.

I don't care. I say, merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

Well said, Master Fred.

Cratchit, what are you doing?

I was just trying

to keep my hands warm, sir.

And what are you doing here, nephew?

I've come to give you a wreath

and invite you to Christmas dinner.

Well, I suppose you're going

to have plump goose

- with chestnut dressing.

- Yup.

And will you have plum pudding

and lemon sauce?

Yeah. Boy, oh, boy.

And candied fruits

with spiced sugar cakes?

Yeah. Will you come?

Are you daft, man?

You know I can't eat that stuff.

Here's your wreath back.

Now out, out, out.

Bah, humbug.

Merry Christmas.

And a "bah, humbug" to you.

That Fred, always so full of kindness.

Aye, he always was a little peculiar.

And stubborn.

Customers. I'll handle this, Cratchit.

Yes, what can I do

for you two gentlemen?

Sir, we are soliciting funds

for the indigent and destitute.

For the what?

We're collecting for the poor.

Well, you realise

if you give money to the poor,

they won't be poor anymore, will they?

- Well...

- And if they're not poor anymore,

then you won't have to raise money

for them anymore.

Well, I suppose...

And if you don't have to raise money

for them anymore,

then you would be out of a job.

Oh, please, gentlemen,

don't ask me to put you out of a job.

- Not on Christmas Eve.

- We wouldn't do that, Mr. Scrooge.

Well, then, I suggest

you give this to the poor and begone.

What's this world coming to, Cratchit?

You work all your life to get money,

and people want you to give it away.

Two minutes fast.

Well, never mind those two minutes.

You may go now.

Oh, thank you, sir. You're so kind.

Never mind the mushy stuff. Just go.

But be here all the earlier the next day.

I will. I will, sir. And a "bah humbug..."

I mean, a merry Christmas to you, sir.

Scrooge.

Jacob Marley?

No, that can't be.

Gosh.

Ebenezer Scrooge.

Go away.

Ebenezer Scrooge...

Gosh, kind of slippery.

Scrooge, don't you recognise me?

I was your partner, Jacob Marley.

Marley, it is you.

Ebenezer, remember when I was alive,

I robbed the widows

and swindled the poor?

Yes, and all in the same day.

- Oh, you had class, Jacob.

- Yup.

No, no. I was wrong.

And so as punishment, I'm forced to carry

these heavy chains through eternity.

Maybe even longer.

There's no hope. I'm doomed.

Doomed.

And the same thing will happen to you,

Ebenezer Scrooge.

No. No, it can't.

It mustn't.

Help me, Jacob.

Tonight you'll be visited by three spirits.

Listen to them, do what they say.

Or your chains will be heavier

than mine.

Farewell, Ebenezer.

Farewell.

Marley, watch out for that first...

step.

Spirits.

Humbug.

What, what, what?

What?

Well, it's about time.

Haven't got all night, you know.

Who...? Who are you?

Why, I'm the Ghost of Christmas Past.

Oh, I thought you'd be taller.

Listen, Scrooge,

if men were measured by kindness,

you'll be no bigger than a speck of dust.

Kindness is of little use in this world.

You didn't always think so.

- Come on, Scrooge, it's time to go.

- Then go.

Spirit, what are you doing?

We're gonna visit your past.

I'm not going out there. I'll fall.

Just hold on.

Not too tight now.

Spirit, look out!

What's wrong, Scrooge?

I thought you enjoyed looking down

on the world.

Spirit, I believe I know this place.

Yes, it's old Fezzywig's.

I couldn't have worked for a kinder man.

Why, it's old Fezzywig himself.

And all of my very dearest friends.

And that shy lad in the corner, that's me.

Yes, that was before you became

a miserable miser consumed by greed.

Well, nobody's perfect.

And there, there's lovely Isabel.

Ebenezer.

- Ebenezer.

- Yes, Isabel?

My eyes are closed,

my lips are puckered,

and I'm standing under the mistletoe.

You're also standing on my foot.

Oh, I remember

how much I was in love with her.

In ten years time,

you learned to love something else.

Why, it's my counting house.

Nine thousand nine hundred

and seventy-two.

- Nine thousand...

- Ebenezer.

Yes? What is it?

For years, I've had this honeymoon

cottage, Ebenezer.

I've been waiting for you

to keep your promise to marry me.

Now I must know,

have you made your decision?

I have. Your last payment on the cottage

was an hour late.

I'm foreclosing the mortgage.

You loved your gold

more than that precious creature.

And you lost her forever.

Nine thousand nine hundred

and seventy...

three.

Please, spirit,

I can no longer bear these memories.

Take me home.

Remember, Scrooge,

you fashioned these memories yourself.

Why was I so foolish?

Why? Why?

What's this?

Fee, fi, fo, fum, I smell...

I mean, I smell

a stingy little Englishman.

I think I do.

Yeah, I do.

Please, let me go.

Don't eat me.

Why would the Ghost

of Christmas Present, that's me,

want to eat a distasteful little miser

like you?

Especially when there are so many

good things to enjoy in life. See?

Mince pies.

Turkeys.

Suckling pig.

And don't forget the chocolate pot roast

with pishmachio...

With smishmachio... With:

With yogurt.

But where did all this come from?

From the heart, Scrooge.

It's the food of generosity.

Which you have long denied

your fellow man.

Generosity.

Nobody has ever shown me generosity.

You've never given them reason to.

And yet, there are some who still find

enough warmth in their hearts

even for the likes of you.

No acquaintance of mine, I assure you.

You'll see.

Here we are.

Why did you bring me to this old shack?

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