Parker's Anchor Page #3

that means I don't get to do my normal routine?

And take my clothes off when I walk in the front door.

- Krystal, if you want, I'll make breakfast.

- I mean, I'm just trying to be myself.

This time, I happened to sing a song, not unheard of.

- Kevin, you want breakfast?

- I feel like you're not even listening to me.

- [Corinne] Oh, we are listening to all of your words.

- [Kevin] Oh, great.

- Do you want breakfast?

- Sure.

- [Corinne] How was the game?

- [Kevin] Uh, it was good, we had a lot of fun.

- [Krystal] Does that mean you lost?

- No, it doesn't mean we lost.

It means I'm trying to instill in the kids

that it's more important to have fun

than to win or lose.

- That's a good lesson.

- Thanks, they totally haven't grasped it.

- Mm, you're the head coach now?

- I am, yeah, which I like, and I think the kids

look up to me and respect me, probably 'cause my style

is pretty on par.

- [Krystal] Obviously, yeah.

- He totally gets it from me.

- I notice the Christmas decorations are out

before Thanksgiving.

- Hey, it's two days away.

- You're a crazy person now.

- [Kevin] Oh, so she wasn't always crazy?

- I will leave them there until after Thanksgiving.

- [Krystal] There?

- Yes, it's nice to have them out and ready to go.

Look, it may be Black Friday for the rest of America,

but for us, it is Christmas Tree Friday.

- You've changed, I don't even know who you are.

- So, I dropped some food on my boxers.

Um, but it's cool, I'm just gonna take 'em off,

so everyone, carry on.

- I've got nowhere to go, but I'm gonna get ready.

- So it's just me and you.

- I have to finish getting ready for work.

Oh, remind me I have something important to tell you.

- Okay.

That worked better than I thought.

I've got eggs on this one

Pancakes on this one

(murmuring and humming)

Time between us

Than most have in years

I try to find an occupation

Something to pass the time

The distance is real

Without our line

- Bartender, let me get two Adios Amgioses.

- No.

That says it all

All my life

- So, did you pick a song?

- No.

- Why, I told you, you are singing,

so you need to pick a song.

- I don't even know these songs.

I got this for you.

- Thank you.

When we meet

Our urgencies, have no fear

- [Little Girl] My mom was now surrounded by friends,

but she still felt very alone at sea.

Oh, oh, you're the sweetest thing

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, you're the sweetest thing

Oh, oh, oh, oh

- What song are we doing?

- I'm not gonna tell you.

Don't worry about it, you'll know it.

- When does Kevin get out of practice?

I'm gonna put him up there for me.

- I'm sure he'll be here soon, and no, you will not.

- Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for coming out tonight.

We have a very special song for you this evening.

- [Little Girl] My dad is really silly.

- There is something that we are all victims of,

and sometimes, when you want to move past something

emotionally, you just have to sing about that experience.

And that is what we are going to do for you right now,

so are y'all ready?

Alright.

- [Krystal] Is that Kevin's brother?

- [Corinne] Yeah.

- [Jared] Hit it, DJ.

- I don't understand what's happening.

- [Corinne] Just watch.

My hair had a party last night

It must have got into a terrible fight

'Cause when my head hit the pillow

It was lookin' alright

My hair had a party last night

My hair had a party last night

When I laid down, everything was alright

It started out friendly

(upbeat music)

(crowd applauding and cheering)

- [Corinne] Good job, babe.

- [Kevin] Thanks.

- It's a good thing you let the kids dance,

they're really good at it.

Should they be here in a bar?

- Oh, it's fine, we got special permission.

- [Krystal] Well, that's just good parenting.

- Ooh, gotta run, love you.

- Love you.

- They do a show with the kids every time.

- Of course he does.

That's not weird.

- [Man] We're on break, it's not gonna happen.

No.

- [Jared] We should probably take the kids home.

- [Kevin] Okay.

- [Jared] So I'll be right back, okay?

- Oh, hey, you two, I was just, uh, I was just gonna go

drop the kids off home, but I wanted to say hi before I go.

- [Krystal] Yes, and great job, very impressive performance.

- Thank you very much, I appreciate that.

It was impressive, wasn't it?

Oh, you know what, I got, like, one more minute for my fans.

What were you saying about the performance?

- [Corinne] Jared.

- [Jared] Yeah?

- [Corinne] Get outta here.

- Okay, I'll get outta here.

There's a couple of drinks coming for you, so enjoy.

- [Krystal] Oh, thank you.

- I'll take that.

My name is Ivory Bill

I'm a woodpecker, you see

Now that we're friends, the story begins

Just call me Ivory

I know what they were thinking

Another young bird with dreams

So I had to get out so I flew down south

To seek a better tree

My name is Ivory Bill

You ain't seen me in a long time 'til

You spotted me up in the tall, tall trees

Mosquito eatin', larvae-seeking

In the swamps of Arkansas

So come and see me and the family

Peck peck peckin' in the trees

I spent some time in Hollywood

Tryin' to make it in the biz

But nobody's seeking that larvae-eatin'

Bird that sounds like this

- Went to the store.

Here's one of those fancy-schmancy coffeemakers.

Be home in an hour.

(peaceful music)

- [Kevin] Hey, Krystal.

- Hey, Kevin, um, I'm just checking in.

You guys have been grocery-shopping a long time,

and I didn't hear from Corrine and I called her

and she didn't pick up, so just checking in.

- [Kevin] We were in a car accident.

- [Corinne] We are fine!

- [Kevin] We are at the hospital.

- [Kevin] I'm fine, Corinne is going to get checked out.

- [Krystal] Okay, I'll be right there.

- There's no need.

I have so much to do, can we please just go, I'm fine.

- No, we are waiting here for the doctor

to come check you out and say that everything is okay.

- Oh, my God, this is ridiculous, I'm fine.

- We were just in an accident.

Excuse me for being concerned about my family.

- You are blowing this way out of proportion.

I barely spilt my coffee, I'm fine.

You should not be drinking coffee now that you are pregnant.

- [Krystal] You're pregnant?

- Um, yes, I'm pregnant.

- Why didn't you tell me?

Is the baby okay, are you okay?

- I'm fine, I'm fine.

- We're waiting for the doctor.

- I'll go to the waiting room.

Congratulations.

- Hey, Krys.

Kevin.

- [Kevin] I'm sorry, but she was gonna find out eventually.

- I know.

I know, I just hope that she's okay.

(somber music)

(Jared whistling)

- Krystal.

- Hi.

- Hey.

You alright?

- [Krystal] Yeah, fine.

- Can I go talk to her?

- No, you're waiting for the doctor, wait.

- Can I have my coffee, at least?

Kidding.

- [Receptionist] Shane Metzel, the doctor will see you now.

- Shane Metzel?

Wetzel Metzel, Wetzel Metzel pretzel.

Did you go in to see 'em yet?

- Oh, Kevin and Corinne?

- Mm-hmm. - Yes, they're fine,

I'm sorry, I didn't want you to think

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