Pee-wee's Big Holiday Page #3

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You're looking at some of the most

sought-after retail items in the world.

Please do not touch the merchandise,

however tempted you may be.

- I won't, I promise.

- Okay.

- Hey, what's that over there?

- Hmm?

I think that's a...

- tumbleweed.

- Oh!

Forgot that word.

Ooh, pecan logs.

Mmm!

Here.

A solar-powered calculator

the size of a business card.

Complimentary.

Ooh, thanks.

Want anything else?

I'm feeling generous.

Top Secret Disguise Kit?

Wise choice!

It's yours.

You never know when

you're gonna need one of those.

Ah, they sell themselves.

Ew! Snake farm.

Yuck. Ugh!

Have I mentioned I hate snakes?

Ah, Pee-wee.

Blech!

Yuck.

Ugh!

I think I'll just wait out here.

Come on.

By the time we leave this place,

I bet you'll be a snake lover, Pee-wee.

Bet me!

Come on.

Baby rattlers are the most dangerous,

because their venom is the strongest.

That's stupid.

Come on, I can't wait

for you to see this place.

They got a snake in here

as big as that bus.

Clay and Jimmy, behold the Cuatro Fuego.

Light four flames at the same time.

What do you think, honey?

We'll take four boxes.

- Deal.

- Deal.

Lame.

Yawn.

Stupid.

It was a pleasure doing

business with you, as always.

How you liking the Snake Farm, Pee-wee?

I thought it would be a little scarier.

You want scary, huh?

If you're really looking to see

something scary...

who's he gotta see, Jimmy?

The Monster.

That is, if you're brave enough.

I think I could handle it.

Well, let's go.

You'll have to sign this release form

before you go in.

We take no responsibility

for any damage that occurs to you,

physically or mentally.

Including death.

Now, initial here.

Here.

And here.

Here.

Here and here.

Here.

And here.

Here.

Here.

Here. Oh, oh, oh...

I forgot this. Here.

And here.

Okay, I'm ready.

- Let's go, let's get this over with.

- Okay, be my guest.

That's it?

Rip-off.

Uh-oh.

Getting dark.

Sure would be nice

to see some sort of sign of civilizat...

Hello, there.

Sorry, I don't mean to trespass.

Trespass?

No such thing in the heartland, stranger.

They call me Farmer Brown.

They call me Pee-wee Herman.

Pleased to meet you.

What brings you to my farm, Pee-wee?

Well...

Say no more.

You've got yourself a place to stay.

Thanks, Mr. Br...

I mean, Farmer Brown.

- Hungry, by any chance?

- Ooh, I'm starving.

Pee-wee, meet my daughters.

Meatloaf?

I'm Linda. Freckled and furious.

Howdy.

Ambrosia salad.

Louise. Perky and fun.

Tomato soup.

Donna. Gregarious and wily.

Mmm.

Green bean casserole.

Diane. Petite and polite.

Mmm.

Waxed beans.

Janice. Tall and studious.

The way she said "waxed."

Mashed potatoes.

Betty. Smart and coy.

That looks delicious.

Biscuits and gravy.

Pam. Thrifty and thoughtful.

Yum.

Melon balls.

Judy. Tan and demure.

Pigs-in-a-blanket.

Peggy. Athletic and peppy.

That's it? Just nine?

Uh, where should I sit?

By me.

Slow down, girls.

Pee-wee'll sit next to me.

Aw!

Would you like to say a few words,

Pee-wee?

Oh, sure.

Uh...

Encyclopedia...

pimple...

and hairball.

Amen.

Amen.

Mmm.

Dinner sure was delicious, girls.

Thank you, Pee-wee.

Ladies, it's getting late.

Bedtime.

Aw!

They are my prized jewels, Pee-wee.

You are a lucky man, Farmer Brown.

- I better be hittin' the hay.

- Just one thing, Pee-wee.

Stay away

from my daughters tonight!

I will.

I really will.

Milk and cookies?

I'm kind of still full

from dinner, but thanks.

Can I come in?

I have extra blankets.

It's 80 degrees in here.

- Is that a yes?

- No.

But thanks.

Remember me? Linda? I've got blankets.

I'm saving myself for marriage.

Let me in!

- I wanna snuggle!

- I promised your dad, no.

- Catch me!

- No.

What are you doing here?

I was here first.

Hi, Pee-wee.

Boo!

Why, hello.

Fancy meeting you here.

What up?

Rise and shine.

Well, come on.

I got a surprise.

Good morning, Pee-wee.

Excuse me, where are we going?

Oh, that's the surprise.

To the wedding chapel where my daughter

is getting married today.

Oh, congratulations.

Who's your lucky new son-in-law?

Well, he's riding in the truck with me.

I don't see him.

It's you.

All the girls sure like you.

Every one of 'em.

You know, all breakfast,

it was "Pee-wee-this" and "Pee-wee-that."

Which one of 'em

are you thinkin' about marryin'?

What about Pam?

She's great at impressions.

- Gee, I don't...

- Did you know Judy is a flautist?

And don't get Linda started on submarines.

So, well, who's it gonna be?

Geez Louise.

Louise!

Congratulations, he picked you!

Yahoo! I'm getting married!

Louise!

We're gathered here today

to honor the deep love

between these two soul mates.

Louise Bobbie J. Brown,

do you take Pee-wee Aloysius Herman

to be your lawful wedded husband?

I do.

And Pee-wee Aloysius Herman,

do you take Louise Bobbie James Brown

to be your lawful wedded wife?

I...

I...

I...

Uh... I...

What?

Oh, I hear nature calling.

I've gotta use the restroom.

I'll be right back.

Excuse me, won't you?

Drat!

Well, howdy, cowboy.

Howdy, partners.

Excuse the intrusion

to this most joyous occasion.

Hey, Peanut, you think these two kids

are made for each other?

Nay!

All right, then.

Well, then, let's get going.

Come on, girl.

Have a good day, cowboy.

Ooh, ooh! Look at you.

You? You're coming with us.

- This your lucky day.

- Ooh!

Right, and that's how we three met.

Best friends since beauty school.

That's a lot of hairdos ago.

- Okay.

- You tell him.

What about you, Wanda?

How'd you get involved?

I had the bus.

And look at us all now.

Four friends on our way to represent

Freewheelin' Hair Mobile Salon

at the National Hair Competition.

And if we win, we get to go to

the International Hair Competition.

- What do you mean "if"?

- Well, I mean...

- Wanda, pull over.

- Pulling over.

Demo.

My friends, let's show Pee-wee

what's definitely gonna make us win.

Ooh, wow!

Hairy. Whoa!

Big.

Who doesn't like giant hair?

You haven't even heard our theme.

Patriotism.

The United States of America.

Wow!

It's way bigger than I thought.

I'm not gonna make it.

The party's in two days.

Look where I am.

Look where I need to be.

I won't get there in time.

What's wrong, baby?

I might as well give up

and go back to Fairville.

My friend won't even notice

I'm not at his party.

Oh, I bet he will.

I would notice if Brook or Lane or Wanda

didn't show up to my party.

Pee-wee,

the hair-spray that holds

Freewheelin' Hair together,

upright and pert,

is our friendship.

We endorse friendship.

To friendship.

Come on.

Thanks, you guys.

I just know that you're gonna make it

to New York City

in time for your friend's party, Pee-wee.

I can feel it.

And you know what, Pee-wee?

You are going to look fabulous.

Ooh... Are you thinking

what I'm thinking?

Ooh, probably.

Ooh, ooh, I think I probably know, too.

Makeover!

- We're here, girl.

- We're actually here.

Here I come!

Helicopter-y.

Have fun at the party, Pee-wee.

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