Pee-wee's Big Holiday Page #4

---

Hey, good luck in the contest.

I really hope you guys win.

- Aw!

- Thank you.

And thanks for the makeover!

Mwuah!

- Bye, Pee-wee.

- Bye, Pee-wee.

Good luck.

How much longer

do I have to wait for my car?

I'm in the prime of my life here.

You!

Why don't you take a picture?

It'll last longer.

Come over here.

Is that helicopter on your head

operational?

Ooh, dog-do.

You're funny!

Amusing.

Bet you'll get a kick out of this.

Easy there, sport.

There's only four of these babies

in existence.

Here.

Whoo!

Whoa!

What is this thing?

It's a flying car, darling.

I'm flying her back to New York City.

That's where I'm going.

I knew you weren't from here.

You stick out.

You've got cosmopolitan

written all over you.

Unless you object to being in Manhattan

in five hours...

...be my co-pilot.

- Get in!

- Yes, ma'am!

Ooh!

Oh, breathtaking view, is it not?

Welcome to the skies.

The name's Penny King.

Pee-wee Herman.

How'd you get your hands on a flying car,

Miss King?

I'm the heiress

to the King Doorbell fortune.

Every time you ring, I hear ka-ching.

Do you live in Manhattan?

Oh, this will be my first visit.

Fascinating.

Tell me everything.

Well, I'm out on the road.

So I could live a little.

Live a little?

I say live a lot.

Live it up.

People like us crave fun and excitement.

Which do you prefer,

salted or honey roasted?

Oh, I don't know.

I can't decide.

Well, why decide, baby?

Take 'em both.

- Sandwich?

- Oh.

Ooh!

Pee-wee!

You're eating the garnish.

I never thought of that.

You're a trendsetter.

Engine failure.

That can't be good, right?

Oh, don't sweat it, kid.

Here.

Au revoir, Pee-wee.

C'est la vie! Live it up!

It's all good.

It's all good!

It's all good.

It's not all good.

It's not all good.

Welcome back to life.

They call me Grizzly Bear Daniels.

- They call me Pee-wee Herman.

- Where are we?

The woods.

In the mountains.

I gotta be on my way.

- How do you get out of here?

- You don't!

Not without a seasoned guide.

Someone who knows these woods

like the back of their weathered hand.

Someone who's lived with nature

since they decided to live alone,

off the grid as a hermit,

and leave the dog-eat-dog world

of certified public accounting.

Is it you you're talking about?

Come on.

Follow me.

I'm your only way out.

Where are we going? It seems

like we're going deeper into the woods.

What was that?

Bigfoot!

Nah, I'm kidding.

I'm kidding.

What do you think,

I'm a crazy man living in the woods?

I don't know.

Are you?

Welcome to my cave.

"Cave"?

Did you say "cave"?

Oh, my.

What a beautiful abode.

Rustic.

Who's your decorator?

Davy Crockett?

Well, listen,

I love what you've done with it.

I simply love it!

So, I'm gonna let you let me run, okay?

You just got here.

Sit it.

Don't move a muscle.

I'm gonna slip into something

a little more comfortable.

Please welcome Grizzly Bear Daniels!

Dad, Dad

Why didn't you love me?

I said, Dad, Dad

Why don't you hug me?

You told me I don't know how to behave

And then I found myself

Living in a cave

I said, Dad, Dad

Why didn't you love me?

I said, Dad, Dad

Why don't you hug me?

Where we headed?

Our village is two miles away.

We'll be there in five hours.

What's up with you guys?

Abe, Ezekiel, you time traveling?

No, no.

We are Amish.

- Gesundheit.

- No, Amish.

Gesundheit.

- No, Amish.

- Gesundheit!

No, no. Amish.

- Gesundheit.

- No, no...

We Amish people

live a simple life.

Gesundheit.

With no reliance on modern technology.

- Wow! You don't even have cars?

- Nope.

- What about lawn mowers?

- No.

Manual only.

- How about hair dryers?

- Nope.

- How do you dry your hair?

- The wind.

- Air.

- Oh.

- How about electric butter churns?

- No.

We churn by hand.

Stop it! Shut up!

Whoa!

Wow!

Cool village.

Amish-y.

So, Abe, Zeke, what do you guys

do for fun around here?

- We work.

- Yeah.

Whoa, slow down.

Hold on there.

What do you like to do for fu-un?

Uh... Oh, check this one out.

Yay! Yay! Thank you!

Thank you.

My goodness,

there's not been this much excitement

since Yoder's horse learned how to count.

You know, being here with all of you,

I feel something.

Peace.

Serenity.

I feel at home here with all you Amishes.

Oh, that's wonderful, Brother Pee-wee.

Now, I'd like to introduce you

to some other guests

- we're having dinner with tonight.

- Oh.

Ruth, Miriam, Orpah,

I would like you to meet Pee-wee Herman.

Wait a minute.

These women are... Ow!

Out-of-towners.

That's right.

We're out-of-towners.

No, they're... Ow!

Owl hunters.

It's our hobby.

No, these women are...

Fudge!

Fudge makers.

From way back.

They're from an Amish village in...

Oh, where did you say it was?

- Las Vegas.

- Yes.

Interesting.

I've never heard of an Amish community

in Las Vegas.

Wow! I love this scrapple!

I'm digging this corn soup! Mmm!

This bologna and chow-chow

is worth the price of admission.

So, Brother Pee-wee,

will you be spending the night here?

Well, I guess I could leave

early in the morning for New York.

We can take you into the city

on horse and buggy tomorrow morning.

If they have a horse and buggy

tomorrow morning.

Time for bed.

But it's 6:
00 p.m.

We should've been in bed an hour ago.

We need to go to bed, everybody.

Shut up.

- You shut up.

- Both of you, shut up.

Fancy meeting you here.

I don't know what you got

up your sleeve, kid,

but if I were you, I'd get off that buggy.

No.

You kidnapped me, stole my car,

and left me tied to a chair.

I should be calling the police.

Amish don't have police,

or phones.

Pee-wee,

I beg you, please don't blow our cover.

Me, Pepper, and Frecks will drop you

in New York City on our way to Canada.

Why would I go anywhere with you?

You and your friends

are nothing but trouble.

Now you're stealing

their horse and buggy?

What is wrong with you guys?

Don't you care about anything?

You know what?

You're right.

And when you're right, you're right.

"Dear the Amish...

Sorry, we are stealing

your horse and buggy,

but we are leaving you

enough dough

to buy a fleet of horses and buggies."

You happy, wimp?

Come on!

What's it gonna be, Herman?

You joining us or not?

Pee-wee.

It's your big holiday.

Come on.

What are we waiting for?

I was wrong about you, kid.

Freckles, saddle up the hay-burner.

Pee-wee?

- Yeah?

- Herman.

Hop up here in front.

Take the reins.

Giddyup.

Yee-haw! Yee-haw!

Ladies, it's been real and it's been fun.

And it's been real fun.

Grab Manhattan by the horns, dude.

You're badass, Herman.

You got my respect, rebel.

Thanks.

- I...

- Here.

No, keep it.

It's yours.

It's got your name on it.

Pee-wee's your name, too.

It's our name.

Four days ago, you were the guy

who was going to New York.

And look at you now.

Here you are.

You made it, baby.

Arrivederci, Pee-wee.

Arrivederci, Pee-wee.

Can someone

get me a tissue?

- No, I mean it.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote