Porky's 3: Revenge Page #2

---

Sorry. We gotta have dinner

with the Franklins.

- Aw!

- Oh, well.

Listen, if it's that important,

I mean...

Have a great time!

- Bye-bye.

- Drive fast.

Have fun.

Well, ladies, let's go.

- Let's orgy!

- Let's get it on!

- Hell, no. Let's get it off.

- Hold it!

What? What's this?

Now, you'll line up like

good little Roman soldiers.

Pay attention.

Follow the rules.

First, we all get undressed.

- They're taking it off.

- Let's go, gentlemen.

We're gonna get laid!

We're gonna get laid!

I hope you don't get scared.

It's amazing what my fertile

mind can come up with.

I can't believe they're

gonna go through with it.

We're gonna get laid!

Well, Billy, you'll finally

get to see your girl naked.

- She's not bad, either.

- Oh, very funny.

- Hey, hey, hey.

- Come on. In the pool!

Last one in is the last one in.

Roman soldiers in the deep end.

Orgy time!

This water's cold.

Hey, where's Meat?

Oh, sheesh!

Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!

What's the matter with you?

- Can't swim.

- Oh, great.

Okay, soldiers. Get it off!

- We're gonna get laid!

- We're gonna get laid!

In the Roman army,

there were gladiators, slaves...

horsemen and cannoneers.

Cannoneer...

I'm definitely a cannoneer.

- And Eunuchs.

- What's a Eunuch?

- It's a guy with no balls.

- I'm a horseman!

You start swimming toward us.

And make it graceful.

Come to your ladies, heroes.

Stay in formation.

- What about your cannoneer?

- Graceful!

I'm the cannoneer. What are you guys

gonna do, leave me here or what?

Back to the deep end.

Come get it, fellas.

Okay. Who wants

to get dressed first?

Come on. Come and get it.

Here, boy.

Here, boy.

Yoo-hoo!

- What are you doing?

- We're going to make a movie.

Ja, ja. A movie.

Well, Meat, we're naked in a pool.

Would you please go get our clothes?

No way. If they're making a movie,

I gotta be the main attraction.

Meat's right. Pee Wee, you go.

You're the short subject.

Ha, ha.

Ha, ha, ha!

I'm naked, treading

water in a pool.

- You're making jokes.

- Jokes. Ja, ja.

Ja, ja.

- Go find a plug for the lights.

- Ja, ja. Plug.

Okay, you guys. quit stalling.

Who's gonna be first?

What the hell.

I always wanted to be a star.

Oh, he's not gonna do it.

He is gonna do it.

Get a shot ofthis, babe.

Well, girls,

how about that orgy, huh?

It's not supposed to work like this.

We're gonna get laid!

Here comes your main attraction.

Oh, no!

Oh, we're not gonna get laid.

Right!

We're not gonna get laid!

We thought we'd come back

early tojoin the...

uh, you came back a little late.

You missed a wonderful party.

Yeah, it was

really a great spread.

Your daughter Connie

really is lovely.

I hope we can call on her again.

Hey, we don't want to be rude,

but we gotta get up early for

basketball practice tomorrow.

- Well, hate to eat and run.

- You know what they say.

- The early bird gets in the bush.

- Take it easy.

You got my shoes up there?

It was the most humiliating

experience of my life.

I mean, it wasn't bad enough we're

running around the pool bare-assed...

with our winkies

flopping in the breeze...

You got a winkie, not me.

You decide you're gonna go out

and greet her folks bare-ass naked.

- Really good idea.

- I liked it. I don't care.

Oh, I'm glad you guys liked it. You love

running around naked with your friends?

- I'm watching the road.

- No, you're not watching the road!

My mom's gonna kill

me when she finds out.

Don't worry about it.

- I don't think you're in my league.

- That's what's gonna happen.

I'm gonna start hanging

out with myself.

You hang out with yourself...

a lot, by the looks of it.

Hey, you know why you're pissed off?

You're pissed off...

because you didn't

get to be a cannoneer.

When we went there, you thought it

was gonna work. Everything was fine.

You had your hand on my ass,

that's why.

- I couldn't avoid it!

- Hey, slow down. There's Brian.

Hey, Brian! Whoa!

What the hell happened to you?

Yeah, aren't you a little

bit late for the orgy?

We've got something

important to do. Pick me up.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Brian's burning oil.

- So, how was your orgy?

- Why weren't you there?

Yeah.

uh-oh.

What went wrong?

No orgy, huh?

There was a tender moment

with Connie's parents.

Oh, I see. Come on. Drive.

- Where are we going?

- Porky's.

Porky's? What are we

going to Porky's for?

No! No way, Brian!

- Look. Coach Good enough's in trouble.

- What are you talking about?

The coach is a good guy.

He's helped us out a lot oftimes...

and now I think it's our

turn let's help him out.

Well, I agree with that,

but we go to Porky's...

and then what do we do

when we get there?

Easy. We shoot pictures

of his illegal gambling casino...

and then we take them to the D.A.

Oh, come on. Porky ain't

gonna let us anywhere near his place.

Meat, ifyou remember,

we didn't have a written invitation

the last time we called.

- Great body.

- Look at that ass.

- I could lick her waist.

- No, you don't lick a waist.

That's not one of

the designated areas.

- How you doing, babe?

- Hmm?

Hey, Meat!

See you later.

- Come on, man!

- Meat, give her a shot, huh?

- uh...

- Hi. I'm Blossom.

Why do they call you Meat?

Why do they call you Blossom?

- What happened?

- We happened.

I guess he hasn't fixed it

up since our last visit.

He must've. I mean, I heard

the coach say he was there.

unbelievable.

Son of a b*tch got a boat.

What do we do now?

Let's go.

- Where are we going?

- It's got to dock somewhere.

Oh, yeah? What'll we do

when we get there?

Let's just get there.

unbelievable.

Sam, you drink that damn stuff

faster than they can make it.

Big b*obs! Great broads.

Mr. Johnson, sure am glad

you won all that money tonight.

Thanks for the tip.

Move your ass! Don't get

in the way of a high roller!

I almost forgot what a mean

son of a b*tch he is.

Good night, Bob.

Come on back again.

- Sure will.

- Take care.

You get your ass inside.

I want to talk to you.

Come on, knock it off. will ya?

Keep your hands off. Be a nice girl.

Get away from...

Leave me alone, for God's sake.

- You know, you guys are morons!

- Shh!

- I don't want to shush.

- Keep it down.

- Keep this down, huh?

- Look where you are.

It wasjust a little joke.

A little joke?

She practically raped me.

She said she was gonna leave me

out there on the highway...

unless I promised to show her

why they call me Meat.

Are you still talking?

You think this is funny, right? Huh?

You, come on.

Get out of my car.

Guys, enough, enough. We still got

to find a way to get onto his boat.

Hi, Daddy!

Hi, baby. Blossom, you have

a good time tonight, child?

Yes, I did, Daddy.

Is that Porky's daughter?

- That's it.

- What's it?

- Meat, do you know how to use a camera?

- Forwhat?

'Cause you gotta take this...

and go with that girl into the casino

and take a few photos ofthe layout.

uh, w-w-wait a minute.

She's gonna let me...

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes