Rich and Strange

---

Hello, Emily.

Hello, Fred.

I think you'll lik e me in

this dress when it's done.

Oh. Have you broken

your umbrella?

I made you steak and

kidney pudding for tonight.

And i was wondering

whether you'd like

to stay in and listen to the wireless

or go out

to the pictures.

Mr. Baker will give his 12th

talk on accountancy in 3 minutes.

The pictures then,

dear?

Damn the pictures and the

wireless and the office.

I want some life!

Life, i tell you!

Like that.

What you want, dear, is

some little liver pills

and some fruit torte.

I don't want any pills.

I want some of

the good things of life.

Money.

Why should you be able

to spend less on yourself

than some women do

on their rotten poodles?

Why shouldn't you have

a hairdresser

and a lady's maid?

Why, Fred, i never

expect those things.

That's just it.

The good little women

like you don't want enough.

Get out of there!

I think the best place

for us is a gas oven.

Fred!

To talk about gas ovens

when we've

a roof over our heads.

Food, beds...

oh, and lots of things.

Is that the post?

Oh, let it be

the gas bill.

Serves you jolly

well right if it is,

talking about

gas ovens.

Oh, thanks.

Have you left everything ready

for me outside, mrs. Porter?

Yes, ma'am.

Thank you.

Good night. Good night,

ma'am. Good night, sir.

Good night,

mrs. Porter.

Is it the income tax?

Em! Quick, look.

Oh!

See this, em?

Now you can have

some real clothes.

Oh! My new dress!

Hurry up, old james,

you'll be late for the office.

You know, em, i always

got into the sea.

I hear it's a bit

rough in the channel.

Hello. We're off.

Come on, em.

Let's take a snap.

I say, em, i think i'll pop

down and get you some sick...

i mean, magazines.

Yeah, but...

oh, my god. The curtain's gone up too soon.

D.

They're not dresse

i mean...

Let's get out of here.

I don't like it.

Why not?

Somebody

just pinched me.

Where?

You know where.

You leave it to me.

So long, folks.

See you tomorrow.

What's in that

parcel, Fred?

For you.

Whoo!

I couldn't wear

this.

People will think

we aren't married.

don't feel

a bit as if we are.

One of the sailors told me

it was a bit rough outside.

Yes,

i heard that, too.

I say, em...

i think i'll go do

wn to the cabin

and, um, i mean,

you know...

to see if everything's

all right.

All right, Fred.

Oh, excuse me.

Oh, hello, commander.

How do you do,

miss emory?

Are we going to have

a lot of fun and mischief?

I hope so.

We're not off yet.

Just about that much.

It's a marvelous night,

isn't it?

Yes, isn't it?

Is your husband

feeling better?

Oh, yes,

he's much better.

He's really

a very good sailor,

but he's not

used to it.

Yes.

Oh, commander gordon,

aren't you coming down?

We're all waiting

for you.

Do you mind if i have

one more pipe in peace?

Oh.

Oh.

You know, these bright

young people

make one feel

awfully old at times.

Oh, i like to keep them

enjoying themselves.

Come in.

How do we go now, sir?

Would you like to try

a little something?

Tell my wife.

She'll get me

a grave.

Very good, sir.

Here's another.

May i draw on this?

Sorry?

Yes. If you want to.

You're the crazies

t person, really.

Why do you say that?

I don't know.

You're delicious.

I could sit and listen

to you all the afternoon.

You're laughing at me.

No, no, i'm not,

really.

Funny you should say that

because i always find it

so difficult to talk

to people.

Do you?

Yes.

But not to you.

I find it quite easy...

much easier than i could

to my husband.

Do you know...

i see...

i beg your pardon.

Oh, no.

Oh, please, i didn't

mean to interrupt.

Go on.

Well, what i was

saying was

you know, i couldn't

understand it at first.

But now i think

i know why it is.

Oh? Why?

Well, you see,

you're just a man

and not my husband.

And if you

get bored with me,

all you've got to do

is to get up and go away

and it doesn't matter.

Yes, but it would

matter very much.

Have you ever been

in love, mr. Gordon?

No, i can't say

that i have.

That's a pity.

That's a pity

because it's difficult

for you to understand.

You see, i love Fred

and he loves me.

And naturally, i want

him to think well of me.

When i talk to him,

i'm always so frightened

of saying something

foolish.

You see, he's

terribly clever.

And i'm not, eh?

No.

Oh, i think you're

interesting and amusing.

And you like the things that i like... yes.

Well, that doesn't

take much doing, does it?

No, i suppose not.

No, i don't think

you're clever.

No, i supposed

i'm not really.

I say, it's

a very lucky thing

that, uh, we're no

t in love, isn't it?

Yes. Isn't it?

Love is a very difficult

business, mr. Gordon.

You'd be surprised.

It makes everything

difficult and dangerous.

You know, i don't think

love makes people brave

like it says in books.

I think

it makes them timid.

I think it makes them

frightened when they're happy

and sadder

when they're sad.

You see, everything's

multiplied by two...

sickness, death,

the future.

It all means

so much more.

Oh, i'm afraid i haven't

made myself very clear.

Yes, you have.

You see, love's a

wonderful thing, mr. Gordon.

Yes.

The kind of love that

you're describing must be.

You know, i think

i shall have to try it.

You must.

You're just

cut out for it.

But do be sure

you get the right girl.

It'd be a crime

if you were wasted.

Mrs. Hill...

will you give me

an honest answer

to a straight question?

Why, yes.

Are you trying

to pull my leg?

Pull your leg?

I don't quite know

why i said that.

H.

It's rather foolis

forgive me,

will you?

Oh, yes, of course.

What i was searching

to say. I mean...

hello, gordon.

Why, hello, colonel.

Oh, and, um, this i presume is mrs. Gordon.

Oh, there you are.

Now, come along, ken.

You distinctly promised

me you wouldn't run away.

I want you to help me

feed the seagulls.

If you come along

with me, colonel.

There you are.

No, no, commander,

don't be silly.

If i may intrude for just

a teeny weenie second.

It's just struck me,

i have the very thing

for your poor ill husband.

That's very kind

of you.

I have a perfectly

marvelous plaster.

You just put one on

and the effects?

Magical.

But what do you?

There's one on the...

next the skin.

I guarantee he'll be

up tomorrow, i really do.

I guarantee it.

Thank you so much.

Oh, it's nothing.

I really only carry them for the

benefit of the less fortunate.

Don't you think the world would

be a better place, commander,

if we all did that sort of

thing a little more often?

Yes, i suppose so.

I'm afraid i don't

bother very much

about other people.

I don't believe it.

No, no. I don't believe it

shall i fetch the plasters later on?

What?

Oh, yes, yes.

Now, commander,

what about a 4 at bridge?

I'm afraid not.

I promised to take

mrs. Hill for a stroll.

If you'll excuse me.

What a perfect gentle knight

you are, commander.

Good evening.

Like to see a ship we

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