Romy and Michele's High School Reunion Page #2

Synopsis: Romy and Michele have been through it all, including being tortured by the Popular crowd when in high school. When they receive word of a 10 year reunion, they come to realize their lives aren't as impressive as they'd like them to be. Instead of staying home they go to the reunion with business outfits, cell phones, and one heck of a bogus success story.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): David Mirkin
Production: Touchstone Pictures
  4 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.2
Metacritic:
59
Rotten Tomatoes:
71%
R
Year:
1997
92 min
2,479 Views


for us to have our|picture taken together?

Yeah, well, Danny Weller, like,|"lodged the complaint," and, you know-

'Cause, "alphabetically,|he's supposed to be between us. "

And then we said, "Okay, Danny.|If you want to be between us...

you can come to Michele's house on|Friday night, and we'll be waiting. "

That's right. He came over and|we're like, "Danny, it was a joke. "

I know! And then we turned|the sprinklers on him!

Oh, my God.|Didn't he die?

- I think so.|- Yeah.

- Oh, my God. Michele. Look|at the "A" group. - Mm-hmm.

Christie Masters,|Kelly Possenger...

Lisa Luder|and Cheryl Quick.

So, who would you say|was in the "B" group?

Oh. The drama crowd. You know,|like Casey Degan and Mark Black.

- Uh-huh. God, I had the hugest|crush on Casey. 'Member? - Oh, yeah.

God, I wonder why|he never liked me.

Young man, there's|no need to feel down

I said, young man-

So, what group would|you say we were in?

Well, we definitely|weren't in the "A" group.

But you know what? We weren't|really in the "B" group, either.

Okay, we weren't in|the "C" group, were we?

What? Oh, no. Michele, come on. I mean, that|was like, all the honour students and like...

the rejects; you know, like|Sandy Frink and Heather Mooney.

- Eeew, look at them.|- We were definitely not in that group.

- Ecch.|- She blinded me with Science

Michele! Oh, Michele.|Over here!

Want me to get your|huge notebook for you?

Oh! Heather! I wanna take another picture|of you and Sandy for the yearbook and-

Oh! I wanna|interview you too...

because I think it would make a really|interesting article for the "Roundup. "

Ohh, Toby! F*** off.

Okay. But can I take|a picture of you first?

So, Romy, what group|were we in?

Well, you know, I'm not sure that|we were really in any group.

I think maybe we were|more like loners.

- Oh, my God! There we are!|- Yeah, and alone. Look.

You know, even though I had to wear that|stupid back brace, and you were kinda fat...

we were still totally|cutting edge.

- I love it when it's hamburger day.|- Uh-huh.

Okay, smile! Great!|Thanks a lot!

- Can I take your picture?|- Oh, please. - Hello, girls.

Don't forget, you have|detention after school today.

- Oh, we won't, Mr Lish.|- Yeah, we're really looking forward to it.

- God!|- Can you believe he just got married?

- Like, how desperate is she?|- I know, it's like: "Hi. This is my husband.

He dissects crayfish, but he|has a really good personality. "

He's the kind of man|that I desire

Sets the summer sun|on fire

- I want candy|- Oh, my God.

- I want candy|- Michele. Billy Christianson.

- Oh, he's so cute. - He|is cute. - Really cute.

- Hey - Hi,|Billy. - Hey

Hey

Hey

- Hey|- Ow! Billy!

Oh, Billy, gosh,|you're so slimy.

I cannot believe he's|with Christie Masters.

I know. She is, like,|so transparent.

Did you hear her report|in Miss Weigatt's class?

She actually thinks she's gonna be a|TV anchorwoman. What a "deludanoid. "

Those weirdos are|staring at us again.

- They're obsessed with us.|- Look at what they're wearing.

Where do you even get|outfits that hideous?

They made them in Home Ec|from their own patterns.

Actually, I think|they're semi-interesting.

In a freakish, off-putting|sort of way. Never mind.

- Christie. - Uh. -|Come on, I'm hungry.

No, Billy. Wait.|I wanna have some fun.

Lisa, gimme the bag.

Here you go.|You are so bad.

- What? What?|- She is out of control.

Michele? Christie Masters|is coming over here.

- Wow. She never comes over.|- Okay, just act cool.

- Hi. - Hi. -|Hi, Christie.

- So. You girls gonna try out for the spring musical?|- Us?

Yeah, you should.|It'll be fun.

- Okay. Why not?|- Yeah. So, um, what musical are they doing?

- "The Music Man. "|- You're kidding!

Oh, the Wells Fargo wagon|Is a-comin' down the street

I love "The Music Man. "

Okay. Can I have|the rest of this?

Um, w-

Mm. It's good.

See ya!

She can be really nice|when she wants to be.

Michele!

- Uh-oh. Don't look now. Here come the|Frink-a-zoid. - Oh, God! He is such a geek!

Hi, Michele. Gee, Michele,|you're looking really lovely today.

Okay. See you in Biology.

I- I-I thought I ought|to tell you, Michele, that...

Christie Masters stuck|magnets on your back.

- What?|- She stuck-

Michele, you do have|magnets on your back!

Oh, my God.|Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.|Help me.

Oh, my God.

Oh, don't let them see you get upset.|That's what they want.

Oh, my God.

- Hey!|- I'm pretending you just did something hilarious.

Now, you laugh at me.|Come on, do it.

God, that was so rude. I mean, you|couldn't help it if you had scoliosis.

I know. And what a b*tch, taking|your hamburger. I mean, what was that?

God, remember the prom?|You got so thin by then.

Oh, I know. I was so lucky, getting|mono. That was, like, the best diet ever.

I wonder, if I had gotten my brace off|sooner, if somebody would have invited me.

I mean, other|than Sandy Frink.

Well, nobody|invited me either.

Well, at least we looked fantastic,|and that is the most important thing.

- We were cool on craze|- Oh, gee. Nice outfits. Really.

- When I, you - Oh, look, it's the|Madonna twins. - And everyone we knew

Could believe, do, and share|in what was true, Oh, I said

Okay, this is so typical.|Of course, we're like the only ones...

who don't look like|we're going to a hoedown.

- Oh, I know. This town is like so unhip.|- Ecch.

- I can't wait till we move to L.A.|- Me too!

Everything's gonna happen for us there,|Michele, and we'll never look back.

- Okay.|- Dance hall days

- Dance hall days|- Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

That hurt.|But it looked really good.

Dance hall days

Oh, everybody!

- Dance hall, dance hall days|- Okay, everyone.

Uh, it's the moment|we've all been waiting for.

It's time to announce|the king and queen of the prom.

- Ahh!|- And the winners are...

Billy Christianson|and Christie Masters!

Ohh! Ohh!

- Duh.|- Oh, it's me!

Boo-hoo!|I'm so surprised!

Thank you. Thank you.

God, Billy looks|cute in his tux.

- He does look cute.|- Really cute.

Do you think, since it's the last night of|school and I might never see him again...

that maybe he would|dance with me?

I bet he would.|I mean, it's senior prom.

Nobody's going to say "no"|to anyone tonight.

Michele, since this is the|last night of school and all...

would you care|to dance with me once?

No.

I'll dance with you.

Nah. It's no fun unless|you really love the person.

Thanks, anyway.

Okay. Who can name the capitals|of all the 50 states?

Okay, Toby. F*** off.

Heather! Can't you be|a little bit more sensitive?

Me? Me? Me be|more sensitive?

You are a jerk-off!

Another kiss|is what it takes

- Albuquerque.|- You can't sleep

- You can't eat|- Albany.

There's no doubt

You're in deep

Your throat is tight|You can't breathe

Another kiss is all you need|Whoa-oh-ohh

- Why are you tormenting me?|- You like to think you're immune to the stuff

- Why don't you go f*** a sheep or your sister or yourself?|- Oh, yeah

Brain-dead|redneck a**hole!

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Robin Schiff

Robin Schiff is a Hollywood writer-producer, best known for the movie Romy and Michele's High School Reunion starring Lisa Kudrow and Mira Sorvino. Schiff was a member of the comedy troupe The Groundlings. She does an interview series once a year for the Writers Guild Foundation called Anatomy Of A Script, where she and Winnie Holzman (writer of the musical Wicked and creator of My So Called Life) discuss the craft with other well-known writers. Schiff also teaches a writing class with Wendy Goldman (whom she met at The Groundlings) called Improv For Writing. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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