She's Funny That Way Page #8

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Just, just, just get over here.

Now, they're all

five in the ring...

Okay.

Hello, Vickie, this is Dr. Do...

Yeah. Yeah, tonight.

The barclay. 8:
00 P.M.

Under the usual name.

You remember that

girl, Glo stick?

Anyone like that?

Right this way, sir.

Thank you, son.

-Hello?

-Seth O'Malley?

I'm just confirming

she's on her way.

She'll be there in half an hour.

Great, thanks. I'm

in a different room.

Yeah, I know.

You told me...

Hang on a minute.

I want a description.

Okay.

-Yes?

-Seth?

How about now?

-Delta?

-No, the Queen of Sheba.

Okay, hang on, Sheba. I'm just on

the other line. Long distance, okay?

-Vickie?

-She's tall and blond and...

Stop her! I can't

see her right now.

Stop her? I can't stop

her. She's in transit.

-Has she got a cellphone?

-Yeah.

Well, call her and tell her to

go on to her next appointment.

I'll call you later maybe.

Well I'll try, but her cellphone

hasn't been working so well.

Okay, call her and

then call me back.

Okay.

-Hey.

-Yes?

Well, come on over.

Where are you, at your

parents'? I'm in 1328.

-Yes, I'll be right there.

-See you soon.

Sorry...

It's okay.

Did you not get the call?

You call me.

No. Vickie. She called to tell you

to go to your next appointment.

I'm busy now.

Busy? Okay.

It's okay, I will wait for here.

No, no, no, no.

Another lady is coming now.

-Yes.

-Yes?

-Who I happen to love.

-Yes.

Do you understand?

My English is not so fast.

God.

Vickie, she tell me come here.

Room

1-3-2-8.

-Yes?

-Yeah.

You don't understand.

I call Vickie.

-Wait, wait, wait, no, no, no...

-Yes.

Wait, don't do that.

You need to go.

Yes. It's ringing.

Jesus Christ...

It's all very confusing.

And it's... Confusing.

Very.

-You know, Josh knows about us now.

-He does?

So does Seth.

Yeah, well... I figured that.

All that's left is Delta...

You mean I should

stay in the play?

Are you kidding?

Of course. Why not?

We're professionals.

No, Kandi, you have to go

back down to the lobby now

and make your call there, okay?

No, Vickie, she tell me,

"hang on".

I hang.

Sh*t!

-Who is it?

-It's me, Sethy.

-Delta!

-Yes.

Just a second! Pants!

Bathroom! Get in the bathroom!

I call Vickie.

You get in there now.

Okay...

How many women do you think he's

done this with? Why does he do this?

What is it all about? Do you

have any idea what's going on?

What is this whole "changed my life"

business? What is the...

What are you talking about?

I thought you wanted

to talk about us.

Go back by the Serpentine

and Hyde Park and...

Just hold me for a moment,

will you?

Come here.

I still got it for you, Del.

Darling,

let me use your bathroom.

My what?

Your bathroom...

My bathroom!

Well, the, the,

the toilet's broken.

I need to call them again.

I don't need to use your toilet.

You don't need to use my toilet.

No, I don't need

to use your toilet.

Well, then I guess if you

don't need to use the toilet...

Please, stop saying toilet!

You are weird.

Hello, Kandi?

Kandi?

Kandi, is that you? I put

you on hold, are you there?

Delta... Delta, darling,

listen, it's not what you think.

Delta!

Delta! Delta!

1329, it should be right

next door to where you are.

Okay, thanks Vickie.

Delta, it was a

misunderstanding.

She wasn't supposed

to come to my room.

Come on, Seth. You can

do better than that.

Why would I have you come over

with her? It doesn't make any sense!

The girl needed to use the bathroom...

She got scared. I don't know!

Lady, it's my fault.

I supposed

to go 1-3-2-9.

Wrong room.

Thanks for bathtub, mister.

-You see? I told you.

-I still don't believe you.

You love your hookers, too.

Just like my husband.

No, it's because I can't

have you. He has you.

Nobody has me.

Good night.

Yes. Arnold Albertson's

room, please?

Hello?

Who? Arnold?

Yes, this is me.

Who is this?

Delta! No, no...

Delta, darling. Where,

where, where are you?

Downstairs?

What are you doing here?

I thought... No, no, no. Yes,

I'm happy to hear from you.

You know, the last time I spoke

to you you were in jail, and...

Yes, come right up.

My God...

Why'd you tell her

to come up here?

We're in a code red, do you

understand what that means?

We have a tornado

coming up the elevator

and it's about to

touch down here.

Now you've got to go.

We're gonna put you...

Jesus, that's the fastest

elevator I've ever seen!

Bathroom!

-I think I'm gonna throw up.

-Do it quietly.

Hi, honey.

Arnold, how long have

you been doing this?

-Doing what?

-Doing what you've been doing.

Obviously, you've

done it more than once.

This whole "Squirrels

To The Nuts" thing

is obviously your own

special little bit.

I thought it was

just ours, Arnold.

Something you said to help me get

through a difficult time in my career.

Evidently you've been using

it as some kind of seduction,

a kind of lure, a kind of a general

serenade for whoever wants to listen.

Delta, darling,

it's more complicated...

Than meets the eye, yes, I'm sure.

Well please, tell me. What is it?

Research for some wonderful

new play you're planning?

Some new film, perhaps?

Well, in a way, yes. I'm

touched by women's stories.

Apparently!

No, it's... I'm

sort of a feminist...

Yeah, sure.

That's not the right word,

but kind of a mental aware...

Odd perfume you're

wearing, Arnold.

Had a little "Squirrels To

The Nuts" up here lately?

What are you talking

about? No! I...

I don't believe this.

Twice in a night?

Delta. Delta. Delta,

don't open the door.

Delta, it's not

what you think it is.

He's right, you know.

It... It's really not.

Okay, you know what?

This is the Topper!

And now comes my exit.

Out of the room,

out of the hotel,

out of this play,

out of my life!

Good luck to you both!

Delta, stop!

Wait!

Delta! Delta!

I don't wanna hear

anything more! Ever!

It's not what it looks like!

Well, it's not exactly first time

I've seen Izzy leave Arnold's room,

-to be honest, sorry.

-How interesting.

It seems that everybody in the

entire world knew what was going on

except for me.

-Stupid, stupid me.

-You're not stupid.

So glad you boys stick

together in a time of crisis.

Seth, what are you even doing

here? You're always lurking.

Just loitering there, with your

scarves and your little dog.

Just stay out of it!

You're the lunatic, chasing

dames with a wife like this.

It seems all men like

chasing dames, Seth.

No, miss Simmons, he was

just trying to help.

You know, he changed my

life. He gave me $30,000

and today I got

my first apartment.

-He what?

-Thirty thousand dollars? U.S.?

-Yeah.

-I can't handle any more!

For one night?

You must be good.

No, no, no, you

don't understand...

I was trying...

You happy?

Where do you get the

right to be so judgmental!

Listen, mate! You don't want to fight

me, I'll kick the sh*t out of you!

-Trained on the streets of London!

-Really?

Is that the same London where you

seduced my wife, seven years ago?

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