She's Out of My League Page #10

- Well, yeah.

- Where are we going?

- Just buckle up!

We should be on our way shortly,

so just sit back, relax and...

The white zone is for

immediate loading and unloading...

You're gonna tell me what's going on?

In ten minutes, Kirk is leaving on

a plane for Branson with a horrible,

- horrible girl.

- Marnie?

- Yes. Let's go.

- If Kirk's getting back together

- with Marnie, I'm not going!

- In fourth grade, I peed in my pants.

On several occasions.

Everybody started calling me Stainer.

Know how I made it through

those dark days?

- Plastic underwear?

- In part.

But also Kirk. You see,

he told me to own that name.

Call myself Stainer,

so that nobody could hurt me.

- What's your point?

- Kirk's the best guy I know.

But he's like... He's like a spider.

You know? He's more afraid of you

than you are of him.

And he also, he has long legs and...

Look. If you want him,

you gotta go get him.

- We're moving. Where is the package?

- It's here.

OK, we couldn't get him off the plane,

so we've gotta get you on.

Oh, thank you, Stainer!

This is so exciting. Yes!

Oh, sh*t. Follow me.

- Excuse me!

- Hey!

- Come on!

- Boarding passes and IDs out.

- Let's keep it moving!

- One second.

Whoa, whoa! What the hell are you doing?

Putting her on a plane, that's what.

Well, unless she has a

first class ticket, back of the line.

Fuller, you have a choice.

You can step aside or you can fight me.

If that's how you want to go,

I warn you, I will go dark side.

OK? I will rip out your hair,

I'll bite your chin off,

and I will stab you in the eyes

with confiscated scissors.

'Cause I am an insane motherf***er!

You know that from the break room!

What's it gonna be?!

Yes!

Please check your seat belts.

We're preparing for departure.

Branson!

They've gone. We missed it.

No, no, no. No. No, this is not...

This is supposed to happen.

This isn't how this works.

- Yeah? Talk to Jack.

- Stop the plane.

Dude, done and done.

Yeah, that's how we roll.

Oh, come here, beautiful.

Time to go to work.

Ladies and gentlemen,

this is the Captain.

We got some kinda light on up here.

Some kind of mechanical problem.

Anyway, we're gonna have to deplane.

Oh, man! What's "deplane" mean?

Come on, Jack. Come on.

Come on, Jack!

That's it! Yeah. Let's go, let's go.

Look, Kirk, I do not know

what's gotten into you,

but I just want to say I forgive you

and we are going to go to Branson,

and we are going to enjoy it!

OK, you got something

off your chest, and that is fine.

And it's over now. We are gonna

pretend that it never happened.

Why are you walking so fast?

Kirk! We're solid, baby!

We're... Oh, that is it.

- That is it! Motherf***er!

- Excuse me. Sorry.

- Sorry. Excuse me. I'm sorry.

- I will catch you, Kirk!

- No...

- I will catch you!

- Excuse me.

- I'm faster than you!

Sorry.

I will catch you if it's

the last thing that I do...

- Who is it?

- It's Kirk. Kirk, where are you?

Stainer, you were right, buddy.

I just got off the plane.

I'm gonna go find Molly.

That's great, except

we're right here. I'm with Molly.

What?!

We came to find you. We're at the gate!

Turn around. we're here.

All right, I'm comin' to you.

Comin' to you!

Excuse me! Sorry, sorry!

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, God.

Hey, wait! Cart, wait!

What the hell?

- Oh, my God!

- Go!

Hey!

Would you stop it?!

I think we should see other people!

Oh, Jesus, Mary and Joseph.

- You OK?

- Yeah.

- Hey.

- Hey.

- What are you doin' here?

- It was Patty and Stainer's idea.

I just...

I just knew that I had to come find you.

- I nearly...

- Kirk, shut up. Let me speak.

That's a good idea.

You are out of shape.

- It's true.

- Yeah, I know.

Not what I thought you were gonna say.

You're uncoordinated.

You're not a college graduate,

you've never been to Europe,

and your car really is a shitbox.

- That's good.

- You were right.

I did ask you out because I thought

you'd be safe and I wouldn't get hurt.

And, yes, I lied to my parents because

I was worried what they'd think.

I'm sorry.

But I'm here to tell you that

I don't care if you want to be a pilot,

a TSA agent or shovel

elephant sh*t at the circus.

Because I missed you.

And I just want us to be together.

- Jesus...

- You really having to think about this?

- Shut up, Patty.

- You shut up!

I don't remember what the

specific question was, but...

- I do.

- You do?

- I will.

- You will?

I missed you.

Guys, this is...

It's a tale as old as time, you know?

Song as old as rhyme.

Think she's still not wearin' underwear?

- Just stop it.

- I heard you.

Seriously. tell me where we're going!

- Nope.

- Why won't you tell me?

You won't show me the tickets.

I'm gonna find out.

- Just trust me, OK?

- Oh, you're so annoying!

Ah, thar she blows!

OK, that is not nearly big enough.

What the hell are you doing?

I've been taking a few lessons lately.

- That's what you've been up to?

- Yep.

I should ask you,

did you pack your bags yourself?

- Yes, I did.

- All right, good.

Everything seems to be in order.

You ever been to San Francisco?

- Yes.

- Good, 'cause we're going to Cleveland.

Pittsburgh tower,

November-five-four-five-Charlie-Papa

requesting takeoff clearance

on runway two-niner.

Five-Charlie-Papa.

you are cleared for takeoff.

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